One Night with Severus Snape
by xHanachanx
Summary: What happens when Lily Evans is faced with a possible divorce and a familiar face from the past appears?
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

Hello everyone!

This is my first fan fiction, I hope people enjoy!

I do **not** own Harry Potter (although I wish I did)

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"Oh shoot!"

I, Lily Evans, was late, late for class on my first day.

'_First impressions are the most important and lasting!_' I could almost hear my friends' voice piercing through my head.

Clearly, my reputation will always be 'the late one.' Had I listened to Mary, I would have been on time, but how is it possible to wake up when they make the beds so damn comfy! It's almost expected that I sleep in!

I looked at the hallways; I was given two choices, left or right. One way led to class, the other led to well, somewhere else.

Hogwarts is a rather large school; if I had woken earlier the perfects would have led me to class. Never mind that, I needed to make a decision, left or right.

Little did the 1st year me know that my choice in direction would cause me to run into someone who would have a large impact on my life.

***

Morning, I feel my stomach flip a few times. I have already made enemies, Lily has been sorted into Gryffindor, and I'm late. How much worse can this get? At least I have been sorted to Slytherin, the house of greatness.

It has been the first time in years that I haven't woken up to mothers' sobs and fathers yells. I'm pleased to be away from home but can't help feel a bit of anxiety and hope for the safety for my mother. The retched man should be executed for his behavior, now if it were me; I would never do that to my beloved Lily.

I needed to run, I loathed the idea of the attention I would get for being late for my class. The only thing I look forward to is that Gryffindor and Slytherin share classes. The others can sod off; the only one I care about is…

_**Thud!**_

I fell to the ground, and looked up to the person who had run into me.

"Lily?" I gasped.

"Oh Sev!" Lily smiled as she gathered her textbooks from the ground.

Lily explained how she didn't know where she was going so I led her to class, we chatted the differences between the houses.

When we arrived to class, everyone fell silent and stared at us.

"Arriving late are we?" Our professor frowned at us.

"Sorry Prof-" Lily began to apologize.

"It's my fault. I dropped my wand on the way to class and she helped me find it." I quickly said.

"I see." Our professor raised an eyebrow. The fucking idiots from Gryffindor were snickering.

"I expect this mistake to not be repeated again."

"Thank you" We both muttered.

Halfway through class, Lily passed me a note.

'Thank you' the note had said. When I looked up the smile she had given me was beautiful.

That smile will forever remain in my heart.

***

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A/N: I hope people enjoyed! Reviews would be awesome? I'll tried to update ASAP


	2. Chapter 2: Lost in emotions

Thanks for the reviews everyone!  
I'm loving the visitor traffic report on fan fiction now –nerdy laugh-! Seeing people from all over the world is reading this is pretty wicked!

I also have to edit the beginning where I stated that "this is my first fan fiction." I actually meant: "This is the first fan fiction I've written **in a while.**" Sorry, I lied.

Now here's chapter two. I hope people enjoy!

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My chest feels heavy, I feel like I can't breathe. It feels like I'm having a panic attack that lasts all day. Why did things turn out like this? _Why?_ I wanted to know. James wants time alone? Why?! I noticed something was wrong; I kept trying to talk to him! But he never talked…

I saw something like this coming, but I thought we sorted through this! The whole thing keeps replaying in my mind. He bloody sent me an owl about it; we live together for god sake! Couldn't he just have told me in person? He told me he's felt like this for a couple of months now.

He doesn't want to be with me anymore after all these years…He told me to ignore his owls because he would try to contact me because he still loves me! Selfish git! He can just go sod off! Actually I would prefer that he stay, with me of course. I saw this coming, I tried to keep it together but I couldn't. What was I going to do? We got a cozy little home together, but I couldn't stay there! I'm hurt, and he knows it.

I can hear James making himself coffee. What am I going to do? Just seeing his face makes my heart feel like its being twisted. I called Mary sobbing telling her I just want to die. I know I'm being dramatic but it's true. I almost feel that I have nothing to live for, we have no children, I mean we almost did but my pregnancy ended with a miscarriage. I'm sure that put a lot of strain on our relationship but still, he could have said something before things reached to this point. We only married a short time ago, now a divorce? What am I going to tell people? That's it! I'm not going to let my pride get in the way. I will walk over to James and beg him to stay.

***

I am so so so stupid! I just ran out! Where the bloody hell do I go? I can't go home to James nor can I go to my parents!

I can still feel my legs shaking. He rejected me. He doesn't want to talk about it. I feel like he's completely shut me out. God why? I must have been someone awful in my past life to deserve something like this.

I slowly start to tear up as memories of James and I flow into my mind.  
It was like a never ending bad dream. Yesterday, we were alright. We were telling each other how much we love each other, cuddling, kissing. What happened? This is all so confusing. It's like he's a different person all the sudden.

I sat down and rested my head in my hands. I needed to think what I was going to do. How am I going to come back in to our home after **that **conversation? I've made such a fool of myself! Suddenly I decided that going to Diagon Alley would be the best idea. It would pass time, plus I can go shopping. _For my new life._ Those words sunk into my heart harder than a pile of bricks.

I silently sneaked into our home and searched for the floo powder.

"Diagon Alley." I muttered.

_  
Bang!_  
Next thing I knew I was in Diagon Alley. I looked at the time only to realize I haven't eaten since morning. It was time for dinner, I didn't want to eat. I went to the Leaky Cauldron for a bite to eat, but I had trouble keeping it down. I must have been stressed, but I don't have time to concentrate on that. I don't want to think about anything, all I wanted was to be in someone's arms, to feel loved. But it looks like I'm going to have to wait a while.

***

I sat in a dingy hotel room looking at the letter Remus had sent me. Apparently, James is drinking and called him on the verge of tears. It hurt, he could have called me. Things could be better. _STOP!! _I needed to stop thinking. I don't want to think about him or anything. I need to get out, anything but stay in here. All I would do is cause myself to fall into a deeper pit of depression. I know! I'll go to Florean Frotescue's Ice Cream Parlor! What I need is a big thing of ice cream, that'll make me feel better.

As I left the hotel, I felt overwhelmed. I just stood there, and looked at the crowd. People were smiling, there were a bunch of handsome men out there. Who knows, maybe the person I'm really meant to be with is somewhere in this crowd.

Either way, I needed him fast. 

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A/N: Hope people enjoyed chapter 2! I tried to update as fast as I could. I'll try to make the next chapter longer, and sorry if it seems like I'm dragging this on. I just want to show how upset she is (Which I'm sure you've noticed) Thanks for the reviews!


	3. Chapter 3 Cambyses

One Night With Severus Snape

Hello everyone! Sorry for the long wait, just have been busy (but not anymore!)

I would like to thank **matrice**, **starsmile** and **ujemaima** for the wonderful reviews!

I do not own Harry Potter, which means no cash for me.

Chapter 3, enjoy :)

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On the way to Florean Frotescue's Ice Cream Parlor I walked by the Quality Quidditch Supply Shop and I couldn't help but think about how well James had played. My stomach gave me a heavy feeling as if it were telling me to stop thinking about James and hurry onto the ice cream.

Diagon Alley was packed as usual; it was close to a new term so lots of students were shopping for their new stuff. I couldn't help but smile when I saw the children who were obvious first years; it felt like it was just yesterday when Severus took me here for the first time, the sounds and the image of how amazing the place still remains in my head.

As angry as I am about Severus calling me the 'm' word, I am sad how things ended. When I say it to James he just laughs and says that what he had done was unforgivable. He didn't deserve to be forgiven. Even though it has been a while since the event happen, I can't help but wonder if I was as angry as I was because I had developed feelings for him at the time. It hurts when a friend betrays you but it hurts even more when someone who is more than a friend betrays you. Had it been more than just a crush? I mean, others had called me a mudblood before and it didn't hurt as much.

_STOP!_

How long had I liked him?

_STOP!_

If only he wasn't so interested in the dark arts…

_STOP!_

My conscious was right, I needed to stop thinking. My precious ice cream was melting away.

***

Later that night, I had a date with a gentleman that had approached me while I was eating away at my wonderful ice cream. It had only been a short time that I was single, and I already had a date. I think a part of me just wanted to get a date to make James jealous and realize that I was a popular lady and that if he wants to go than, fine, there are other men who are happy to take his place. Another part of me felt guilty, thought it wasn't a good idea because James might take me back and seeing that James is the jealous type, he wouldn't take the fact that I went on a date with another man would send him through the roof. But there was always that constant reminder that James said he was not going to take me back, that this is for the best.

After the kind (and handsome might I add) wizard invited me for a bite to eat at the Leaky Cauldron, I quickly went to Gringotts for some money to pretty myself up a bit.

Mary still hadn't contacted me after I went crying to her; she's probably exhausted with me. Selena has contacted me to see if anything had changed, most likely for gossip reasons. She's always been like that.

I decided to tell Selena about my date with the handsome stranger, I figured that since she likes to blabber quite a bit, James would most likely hear about before the date was even over.

When I did contact her, I was right. She needed to know ALL the details.

"What's his name?" Selena whispered. The interview had started.

"Cambyses Poure" I answered.

"How old is he?"

"I'm not sure, but he looks about our age."

"What's he like?"

"Oh…I'm not sure how to describe him…Wait! You know the wizard on the cover of the _Witches Weekly_? He looks like that, except has sandy blonde hair instead of black." I sighed. He was almost too good to be true.

"Ohoho! Sounds like a really handsome man!" Selena giggled.

"Yeah, a lot better than James" I sighed.

He had probably found himself some hot witch by now her name was probably something like Alexia. Probably a witch who's a top model (all natural body of course) and she probably even helps poor stray animals on her spare time.

It probably didn't even matter that I was going on a date with a handsome charming wizard tonight. He had Alexia now! She made everything alright, everyone loves her and she loves everyone right back. He's probably having a nice meal with her right now, that she prepared and telling her how much he loves her all while I'm here going on a date with a complete random stranger that could possibly be a serial killer for all I know.

Stupid Alexia.

***

As I waited for Cambyses, I thought of all the things that were possibly wrong with him. Why such a charming man who could be a model picked me. As I ordered a drink for myself, I thought of more reasons that he could be a rapist.

"Lily!" Cambyses said as he rubbed my back.

_Too touchy _was what I could think of.

"Hello Cambyses" I smiled. I can't lose to kindness to that Alexia. She probably doesn't exist, but she could. She might even be better than I imagine.

Remus had sent me an owl kindly reassuring me that James was still alone and miserable. James must have asked Remus to keep Alexia a secret for now.

_He probably felt too sorry for me to tell me about "Alexia" _I thought as I chugged the remainder of my drink down.

Cambyses talked about his interest in potions and his hope to have a career creating potions.

_Just like Severus_

Severus wouldn't have done this to me.  
_  
NO!_

It isn't over with me and James! Not yet! At any moment I'll receive an owl from James who'll say he misses me and he wants me back!

I continued to nod at what Cambyses was saying. I would occasionally listen in at parts of what Cambyses was saying.

"…He really is a git."

"…You're beautiful."

"…Last year when we were studying…"

Occasionally I would throw in the gasps and giggles but my mind was somewhere else.

"…Hogwarts is such a lovely school."

"Oh! You went to Hogwarts?" I interrupted.

"Yes I do. I'm entering 7th year in September." He grinned.

_Wait….What?!_

"Pardon me?" I smiled.

"I'm entering 7th year this year. I'm in Ravenclaw."

_He's bloody younger than me?! Oh my god!_

I needed a way out, suddenly he didn't look as handsome as he did at first. I mean he still was handsome but he looked more like a child.

"You shouldn't be in the Leaky Cauldron than young man!" I whispered.

_Oh no, what if I get blamed for a minor being in here!_ I thought

"You're here escorting me! It's alright!" He winked.

I needed out now. An excuse.

"…Oh that's right! I…er…need to go to the ladies room for a bit."

"I need to go to the bathroom too!" He winked.

_Merlin's beard!_

I paced through the crowd to hopefully lose Cambyses. It wasn't going so well.

If he wasn't younger than me, I might have agreed. ..Maybe not. He seemed rather…experienced with doing this kind of stuff. Stupid womanizer! At such a young age!

As I was walking (rather fast, I might add) Cambyses was still right behind me. This guy does not know when to cut it! If he wasn't this good looking it may have been easier.

Suddenly I looked up. I don't think I'll ever know why I reacted this way but it's like my body could sense security.

There right in front me I saw Severus and what did I do? I clinged on to him.

After all those years of how I imagined us meeting again, how he would have to _beg _me…I clung on to him.

***

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A/N: Thanks for reading! I'll try to update again soon...More reviews the faster I work? heh heh


	4. Chapter 4: Severus

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone, I started working on chapter 4 the other night and was able to come out with more material than I expected to. Maybe I need to write while I'm in bed more often. Either way this is chapter 4!

I would like to thank **matrice** again for another well detailed review. I really appreciate it!

Anyways, enjoy!

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I was sitting alone at the leaky cauldron, a usual habit of mine on a Saturday evening. Especially since a new school year was starting and that meant teaching those idiotic students again. I'd had better embrace my remainder of my alone time.

As I took another sip of my drink I looked around. I see the regulars, some as lonely as I and some with a new witch each week. Some of the witches that come during the night can be rather desperate, which makes it easier for the frisky wizards. I mean, earlier Lucius was here but he left with a rather busty witch, she probably has had practically the entire wizarding world in her at least twice. If Narcissa ever found out, there would be hell but the chances of that are really unlikely. I mean if she did find out she would most likely come to me for advice, maybe even ask me help her to plan revenge. I don't mind helping her but anyone else can bugger off, I would like to think I have made things clear that I really don't give a shit about their problems.

It was only during the day that the children are allowed in here, so it was night that was much more preferable for me. More time to be alone, I mean I would invite people but I doubt a large gathering of death eaters would make anyone else around happy. Especially with that new girl, Regulus' cousin…Bellatrix. Really peculiar girl, really. She belongs in a psychiatric unit at St Mungos Hospital, but I guess that's why the dark lord is so fond of her.

As I was starting my third drink I turned to see a very beautiful woman in the corner. I guess it was true that alcohol improves looks, this witch was beautiful. She was almost like…

_Like Lily…_

It was like the clone of Lily was right before my eyes.

Merlin, I must be drunk if I am having hallucinations of Lily.

No I couldn't possibly be that drunk already.

Which meant Lily was right before my eyes.

But she doesn't seem to be with Potter, unless Potter used a potion to make himself beefier and blonde but... she has a look of sadness in her eyes.

No, she's probably perfectly happy. I'm just imagining that she looks unhappy with beefy Potter

_Lily..._

The love of my life was right before me.

_What do I do?_

Any intelligent wizard knows not to approach the fiery red head especially when she hates you.

_Hate…_

Those words sunk into me heavily like a pile of bricks.

_What do I do?!_

No apology was ever going to excuse what I did.

_So what are you going to do?!_

I needed to go home to rest. I'll most likely need to brew a hangover potion.

I need to leave here out of love.  
The best thing I can do is leave here before she notices me, because there is no doubt that if she sees me her night will be ruined.

As I paid my tab I turned to look once last time to see her. She was gone. Maybe it was all my imagination.

Imagination or not I really needed to get myself to home.

"Apparate safely" The bartender had reminded me as I headed towards the exit.

I closed my eyes for a second, so I could imagine her one last time before I returned home to sleep my sorrows off.

Just as I was fondly remembering the smile she had given me years ago, some dimwit had grabbed me from behind.

I immediately grabbed my want and pointed it towards the idiot who dare attack me. When I turned to glare at the pompous, I started back into the emerald green eyes of someone very familiar.　The eyes I had longed for were staring right back at me.

"L-Lily?" I manage to gasp out.

My mind was blank trying to process exactly what was going on.

We continued to stare at each other and she did not let go.

Merlin I must have looked like a fool. My mouth was moving but I couldn't really say anything. I didn't know what to say. I could feel my heart beating fast and praying that she didn't hear how fast it was beating.

It had been 4 years since Hogwarts, there was so much to say.

Suddenly the young man from earlier had broken the silence.

"Lil, babes. Why are you running away from me?"  
He winked at her and than his eyes starting trailing up slowly and noticing me.

From the way Lily was holding on to me and the way he spoke it was clear he had been harassing her.

"Good evening Mr. Poure"

"P-Proffesor Snape. How good to see you!" Cambyses squeaked.

"Attempting to womanize someone much too high for your league Mr. Poure?"As I returned a smirk. All the girls in the school (including some teachers) were practically drooling at Cambyses Poure, I personally think it's sleazy.

"Like you can have any standards" He muttered.

"Remember . I'm not the one who has been spotted in a place a minor shouldn't be in. And depending on what is said, you may be suspended or even expelled. I'll be having a word with the headmaster." I curled my lips. He knew that he needed to suck up big time.

Poure squeaked and ran off.

***

Seeing Severus scare off Cambyses was _amazing_.

I mean, it startled me that the Severus I knew from school had quickly snapped back at someone. If he had that attitude in school, James would have never picked on him. I never even knew he was capable of snapping back so fast.

I slightly blushed when he had put his arm around me while shooing Cambyses off.

He had matured so much. He wasn't as lanky as he was in school. His voice. Oh Merlin! his voice! It could easily make any woman melt.

He may not be the most attractive person in the world, but he was making my heart pound really fast.

I couldn't help but stare at his lips and wonder what they would be like to kiss. The way he curved his lips and the smirk!

What had I missed?

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed! **Reviews make me write faster!!**


	5. Chapter 5: Glamorous Life style

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone! Another update on the story, I really am not lying when I say reviews make me work faster. Each time I see the reviews, I get way too happy and write away. I would like to thank **matrice** and **ujemaima** for their wonderful reviews! Yes, Cambyses is a git and Severus is quite smexy –giggle- and yes, it's true, with the feelings Lily still has for James, it can hurt Severus quite a bit.

Speaking of Severus being sexy, the other day when I was on good ol' google, I came a across a shirtless picture of Severus that said _"I will be waiting for you mistress." _The look on his face made me laugh a little too hard than expected. How I didn't see this before, I will never know. Either way it made my day. Anyways, enough rambling from me, here's chapter 4..no wait it's 5? Anyways, here's a new chapter!

Enjoy!

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Lily Evans had always been an intelligent woman.  
I say woman because no girl could ever posses the beauty and intelligence any one could have.  
_She was my angel.  
_  
Why she threw it all away on Potter I will never know.  
The arrogant bastard didn't deserve her.

_Neither do you…_

And because I knew that, it tore me up inside.

The day I first saw her, I knew she was special. Every day I would secretly watch her and her sister as they played and when I got home at night I would embrace the smile I saw. That smile always kept me alive even in the darkest times, even now.

When I witnessed her first perform magic, I thanked the lord because there was finally an opportunity to talk to her. Every day before I went to go and watch her I would tell myself that I would talk to her, I now had an excuse. Magic was something we had in common, I could talk to her about that, but every day I chickened out.

Then one day, I finally did it.

"Y-You're a witch." I stammered. _I did it!_

I didn't know how she would take it, seeing that most people (especially of the female species) don't quite enjoy being called a witch. She took it surprisingly well but that sister of hers didn't, but than again, her sister never took anything well.

And here was my second chance to make amends for the past.

***

Just as Severus felt the touch of Lily's body against his, he immediately flushed. He could feel his face burning up. He had hoped the lighting would have concealed the color his face had just turned.

As the two of them watched Cambyses scurry off it occurred to them both that they should have prepared themselves more for the reunion with each other.

_Severus, you see her? Don't do anything stupid_. Severus was quickly telling himself.

While Lily on the other hand kept thinking on how the reunion wasn't how she had imagined.

"Severus…" Lily said uneasily, slowly letting go of him.

"Lily…" Severus croaked out.

They both had wanted to say so much but either not knowing where to start or pride kept getting in the way.

Lily knew that having a reunion between her and Severus was not a good idea, especially seeing that she was in such a vulnerable state.

_He's probably moved on by now. Look at him! He clearly doesn't want to be here! I must be the only one who hasn't moved on. How foolish of me… _Lily thought to herself.

Little did she know that Severus was thinking the exact same thing as she was.

"Thanks for helping me out there…"Lily trailed off. She could barely even make eye contact with him.

"Not a problem." Severus replied easily.

"I guess I should get going…" Lily said, her heart was telling her to stay but her mind was telling her to go.

_No! Don't leave yet!! _Severus thought.

"Wait!" Severus yelled. It was completely out of character for him to do that.  
_  
Merlin, why did I do that?  
_  
"I er…was hoping…that we could…er…catch up?"  
_Real smooth you git.  
_  
She gave a quick sigh and agreed. She had to stop herself from putting her arms around his neck and hug him. As annoyed as she was at him, she still craved to have the relationship they had before. She could tell him anything, she had missed him. No one could ever be the same as he was to her; he held a special place in her heart.

They both headed towards a nearby muggle pub and couldn't stop thinking on what they were going to say to each other.

As they sat down in the corner away from the crowd they ordered a drink. They both needed one.

Few drinks later, neither of them had still said a word.

It had been Severus' 3rd drink and Lily was not far behind. There had been a silence that neither of them had the courage to break. Severus would occasionally run his fingers through his hair and let out a heavy sigh, while Lily would stare at her drink for a while than consume a large portion of it.

After a while the silence was broken by another sigh by Severus.

"I'm really sorry," he blurted out. "I just don't know where to start." As he took another swig of liquid courage, he had acknowledged in his mind that apologizing about the past out of the blue would cause things to become even more awkward.

Lily looked up in surprise. She had finally looked at him.

"It's alright Sev; I guess there's a lot to say at once huh?" She smiled and took another sip of her drink. To her relief he sheepishly returned her smile.

"How are you?" He finally asked.

"Absolutely fantastic, I'm in a middle of a possible divorce" Lily spoke gloomily. "He won't even speak to me." She added. She immediately regretted even saying that all the sudden, dumping all that on him on their first reunion.

Severus couldn't help but feel a tinge of hope.

"Oh?" He queried, pretending not to care. But on the inside he was jumping up and down like an 8 year old. Nothing had made him this happy except for when…Never!

"Yeah, all he says is he wants to be alone. I asked him if it was because he wanted to be with other women. He said that wasn't it, he just doesn't want to be with anyone, he wants to be single." Lily said with a tinge of hurt in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry to hear." Severus lied. He was angry inside, _that git! _He thought. _How could he do that to her?! He was throwing away someone that was really special. He could never find a girl such as her even if he tried!_"I'm really sorry," Lily smiled sadly. "I shouldn't have dumped all that on you. How have you been doing?" She knew that Severus wasn't good at consoling people.

"You really mustn't apologize." Severus sighed. "You were always there for me; the least I could do is return the favor." He said this time taking a gulp of whisky, he was mixing drinks.

"As you can see I am living quite the glamorous lifestyle." He sarcastically said.

Lily let out a small chuckle in return, she loved his sarcasm.

In all reality, his life sucked. He was lonely and depressed, the closest thing he had was probably a stripper, but he had to buy her "love." He did have Lucius, but he felt more like he was Lucius' henchman than anything. No, he shouldn't think that, he had his books. _  
_

_How pitiful_. He quietly thought to himself. He was nothing without Lily, he was a reject.

As more and more time went on, both of them were talking like old times.

Lily had missed this, things were going smoothly. If felt like old times, except better. It was a dark time but there was even more laughter than before. At times, she had so much fun that she forgot what was going on between her and James. She was having more fun than she had in a long time.

It was getting late, by the time they realized the time they decided that they make plans to meet again to continue talking.

Severus watched Lily apparate before he did so himself. Luck was finally turning in his favor, and that never happened to Severus Snape ever. He was almost waiting for something bad to happen. He went to sleep smiling for the first time in years, he couldn't wait to meet Lily again tomorrow.

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A/N: Thanks for reading! Hope you're enjoying it so far! Will update again soon! Remember, reviews make me work faster tee hee


	6. Chapter 6 Candle light dinner?

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone, another chapter update from moi! I would like to thank **ujemaima**, **David Fishwick**, and **matrice **for their lovely reviews!

So in all honesty, last chapter ended quite differently from what I had originally planned in my notebook. It ended with Lily exploding angrily at poor Severus; basically she Christian Bale'd him at the end. I like this option better.

**Also I won't be able to update till Monday**, since I will be travelling but I will have my handy notebook on me. And the more reviews the longer the chapter will be muwahaha.

Well here's chapter six, enjoy  
I don't own Harry Potter, please don't sue…please.

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Severus woke up in pain. He was right to expect something bad to happen after something so good happened.

_Had it really happened? _

Before he started to debate with himself again whether or not the meeting with Lily happened the pain distracted him yet again. Last night, after getting home he had been so happy he completely forgot to brew himself a hangover potion. He stumbled around his house groaning loudly in pain.

_Bloody hell _he thought to himself, even he had to acknowledge that he had drunken way to much alcohol the night before.

_How many was it, at the very least 7?_Idiot," He muttered under his breath remembering that he mixed drinks. He was surprised that he didn't get up and start dancing on the table while ripping his shirt off or yelling something ridiculous as '_Take me man meat!'_ Severus has seen something like this happen to his fellow death eaters way to many times.

"

He clumsily dug through his cluttered cupboard to finally find the small vial with the very lovely potion that would cure his hangover. Being Severus meant he had thought of all the bad things that could ever happen, so that's why he was smart enough to have an extra vial prepared just in case he forgot to make one upon coming home, which would mean having to live through that terrible hangover for much longer than he would like. Now, some people may call that behavior of his being as catastrophizing but he saw it as thinking ahead.

As the pain slowly disappeared, he began to replay the entire night again in his head. In his mind he knew that he had talked to Lily but it still hadn't hit. He was expecting to wake up from all this. There had been too many times where he dreamt about the two of the reconciling their friendship but each time he woke up disappointed and started the day crappier than usual. Severus felt like his heart was being squeezed from just the memory of losing her. He gave a small smile to himself, it was painful losing Lily before, now was his chance to redeem himself.

Maybe this is where his life turns for the best  
_  
it's about time _he thought to himself, life had a lot to make up for.

***  
Lily woke up feeling not quite refreshingly as she would like, she ran to the bathroom to reacquaint herself with the toilet for the 3rd time in the morning.

_Bloody hell, _she thought _I am never drinking again…_But she knew that she would probably drink again. _I just shouldn't drink as much_ she sighed to herself.

While staring into the toilet bowl Lily had time to think, she was disappointed to know that James had not replied to the owl she sent him yesterday morning. She fought the urge to send him another one through the day, but thankfully Severus had distracted her through the night so she didn't have to fight to not owl him again yesterday. Now the problem was this morning, she wanted to owl him so badly. It didn't help that she had dreamt of James appearing and telling her he wanted her back. Speaking of which, James never came in and saved her from her date with Cambyses, Severus did instead.

_I need to get over James_ Lily angrily thought to herself but knew that it would be a difficult task. She just needed another distraction. She decided to take a bath to distract herself from the urge of sending James an owl about 5 million times.

As she started the water for the tub, she couldn't help but smile to herself. The friendship she and Severus once had was back on track again, if not better. She was excited about seeing Severus again, too excited. As she was happily thinking about the night her and Severus had, she realized that the tub was about to overflow. She slowly put her foot into the nice warm bath; she felt her nerves slowly relaxing. It was a brilliantidea to take a bath.

After about 5 minutes, she started thinking about James again. The thought that he hadn't even contacted her once made her upset. She absolutely _needed_ to talk to him, if she didn't; she really was going to lose him. She would rather try rather than wondering her entire life of what could have happened. She looked at the time; she had a few hours before she was going to meet Severus. She was sure that things were going to change, Severus would understand and be and be happy to accept a rain check. He would be happy for her! After that she would have to get James to apologize to Severus for his attitude in the past, than all three of them can be good friends! Plus it was Sunday, she was sure that James was going to be home.

She blow dried her hair, did her makeup and added some perfume. She looked hot, it was going to be hard for James to resist her.

Before apparating, she took a look in the mirror one last time. She took a deep breath and than apparated.

_**Crack!**_Before she knew it, she was back in her and James' home. The smell hadn't changed; it was so much better than her dingy hotel room.

"Hello?" A voice called, it was James. She heard him walk closer; her heart was beating harder and harder. She almost felt the urge to hide, she felt like she was breaking into her own home. When she saw him walk in, she felt like she couldn't breathe.

"Lily." James frowned.

"We need to talk James, and you know it." Lily said quickly said, she was nervous as hell.

"That doesn't mean I have to." He grumbled.

"James, it's always like that! You never wanted to talk, it always was once excuse after another! You said you'd been upset for months; I gave you an opportunity to talk to me. I _asked_ you if anything was wrong, you still refused to talk. Why didn't you say anything than?!" Lily tearfully said.

"Because I didn't want to talk about it." James sighed rubbing his temples. He was stressed; Lily did not come at a good time. She did have a point; it wasn't like during the course of 4 months he didn't have any time to talk to her. He was just sucked when it came to communication.

"It's no easier for you than it is for me" James finally said.

_Was he kidding? _Lily thought angrily to herself.

"You have to be shitting me! Of course it's been harder you have had a lot of time and consideration and might I add, without giving me a chance. While I get a 'surprise, I've been upset for months now! Bye!' I still have yet to process things; you refuse to talk to me. How the hell should I move on when information is kept from me?" Lily yelled angrily, she had a good point.

James grabbed a nearby chair, sat down and rubbed his temples. He let out a huge sigh, she was right but he just didn't want to admit it. He really didn't want to be with her anymore, he didn't want any other woman and he knew that what he was doing was really unfair to Lily.

"You need to go." James finally said, he knew he couldn't handle this anymore.

"What?" Lily asked. _No! It's not supposed to end like this _she thought to herself.

"No" she stubbornly said.

"I need you to leave" James firmly said. "We can't do this anymore; I'll be contacting the lawyer soon about our divorce."

"No…You can't do this to me." Lily's voice shook.

"I'm sorry" James looked down looking ashamed.

"If you're sorry than work it out!" She screamed.

"Nope" James replied coldly. He was really starting to irritate her.

"You need to move on Lily." James sighed.

"I already am." Lily spat out to James' surprise. She had no idea where that came from.

"I've already had a date with a nice handsome younger man. And now I have a date with someone we both knew from school." Lily said with venom in her voice.

"Oh?" James said, he was surprised. He pretended not to be surprised but she moved fast, than again she was a good catch and he knew it. Selena hadn't mentioned of there being another man, she had explained in explicit detail of the younger man. It made him jealous but he didn't want to admit it, he never would admit to it anyways.

"Ah! Well if you don't mind me, I have a date to get ready for." Lily hissed, she remembered that James was a jealous man. He was going to stop her or come apparating after her.

"He's a very handsome and clever man" she grinned wickedly before apparating back into her hotel room.

Okay, going on a date with Severus was a little farfetched but from the eyes of anyone it would _look _like a date. Going on a date with Severus was a rather weird idea, now she was going to be all fidgety during their date.  
_No, not a date_ Lily thought to herself. She felt like she was 15 all over again.  
She slightly flushed at the idea of her and Severus having a candle light dinner, but the more she thought about it, the funnier the idea was. The idea of _Severus _and _candle light dinner _did not mix well.  
She pictured the whole thing, Severus would have written her a _poem_, and the moon would be shining over them as he hold her hand and look deep into her eyes and say "_I love you Lily." _

_Wait, what? _Lily caught herself thinking. The words _I love you Lily _echoed in her mind. She blushed for a moment; it was weird because usually she imagined James' words. Now it was Severus, she must be going mad.

After pretending to be busy in her hotel room for about 15 minutes, she came to conclusion that James was not going to apparate after her in hopes to have her back. He probably was laughing about it with that girl again, _Alexia_.  
Alexia probably was comforting him, that's probably he wanted me to leave. He had _Alexia _now, well…She had Severus!

_Lily, Alexia doesn't actually exist and Severus is just a friend_ Lily told herself. James was right; she needed to move on, as much as it hurt, it was time. She decided to get ready for her pretend date with Severus, she wondered how James would react if he knew it was Severus. _Might as well look good while I'm at it_, Lily thought as she rolled her eyes.

So what did Lily do? She went for some retail therapy ofcourse.

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A/n: I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter, see you guys on monday! R&R please!


	7. Chapter 7: Hard situation

A/N: Hello everyone, thanks for waiting for me to update. Over the past few days I lacked internet access and over the weekend I remembered there is such thing as time difference. It is Monday morning in Canada, unfortunately my notebook is in the suitcase and before I left I tore out the beginning of the chapter and shoved it into my purse oh so graciously, so I will update what I have no and update more later today. So thank you all for your patience. I would like to thank **matrice**, **ujemaima, **and** David Fishwick **for their reviews. I really do appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. As you've probably noticed it is more than just one night with Severus blah blah blah.

I don't own HP, I wish I did but sadly I don't

Anyways heres chapter 7, enjoy.

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Severus Snape has not exactly ever been known as a handsome young man. In fact, the only person that has ever called him handsome was his mother, if that counted at all. And it also was when he was about 4 years old, hopefully her words haven't expired. He really didn't care until now about his appearance. He contemplated getting his hair cut and finally fixing his nose but if Lily asked the awkward question of what prompted him to change all the sudden, he would most likely be unable to think of a good enough excuse. If it came to small changes, he could probably change his wardrobe a bit, the only piece of clothing he had was that outfit that worked incredibly well with that cape of his. It created fear among students, and he wasn't exactly teaching at Hogwarts to be complimented on the choice of colors he wore or how greatly handsome he was (although a few comments wouldn't hurt.) However, if a student or even another teacher ever complimented him he would most likely reply something along the lines of:

"_There are more important things that need to be concentrated on perhaps your school work instead of simply gazing at men like an idiot. Now, turn to page 394._" Anyways, anything other than black, white and the occasional hint of green, it really didn't suit him. What others do you expect him to wear? _Pink_?

Severus Snape was lonely but he isn't exactly inexperienced. He has had about 3 or 4 women, only one he was really serious with. A large portion of women hinted that they were highly attracted to the fact that he was capable of intimidating anyone.

_If only they knew how I was in school..._ Severus often scoffed to himself. But other than women from the past he really didn't have anyone, he had the occasional comfort from his hand or a nice lap dance from a stripper, but again, that usually ended with his hand, because even strippers had standards.

When he first became a death eater, he participated in rituals of raping young muggle women. It was one of the main reasons he wanted to become a death eater other than gaining power, being respected and making _others _fear _him, _instead of the other way around. However, all the kicking and screaming was not exactly a turn on in his books and tears can't exactly be used as a lubricant.

"The more a woman fights, it turns a man on" Lucius argued once.

Severus really didn't see the logic in that nor did he ever want to see the logic behind it, _whatever floats his boat_ Severus silently thought to himself. Another reason why he refused to participate in this ritual was because the general behavior reminded him of his father, someone he vowed to never become since he was a small child. So whenever the event took place, Severus just simply stated that he would not degrade himself to fuck, not even touch a filthy mudblood. The dark lord smiled and favored him even more and even gained a large amount of respect from other Death Eaters, a portion of them eventually started saying the same thing. Whether or not they meant it was one thing, but Severus sometimes figured that some of them were simply looking for an excuse because they felt guilty. Either way, it was an excuse good enough to not make Severus participate.

Severus also wasn't exactly too fond of his lovely dark mark on his arm. Once a rather drunk muggle commented that it was a 'pretty cool tattoo' when Severus just finished a pretty nasty fight which conveniently tore most of his sleeve off. Unfortunately for the muggle, Severus had not exactly been in the greatest of moods and the man happened to slightly resemble (keyword: _slightly_) James Potter. The poor man's memory was erased but not before Severus cast a few Cruciatus curses on the poor fellow before he left. Upon hearing what Severus had done, Lord Voldemort was quite pleased and praised him even more. Oddly enough, Voldemort was one of the main reasons he hadn't tried to leave. Being a death eater he received fine praises from the dark lord and other death eaters, he had a social circle, not the most stable, but it wasn't like Severus had anyone else.

***

When Severus arrived early, he was surprised Lily had already been there. She looked bloody amazing; any man was a fool for not thinking that she was beautiful.

Lily had gone out shopping a few hours earlier, she needed it and retail therapy has proved that it works yet again.

"Sorry to keep you waiting: Severus had said in his usual tone. He realized that it was _Lily _he was talking to not a simple dimwit that was either a student or a Death Eater. Little did he know that Lily was practically melting by the sound of his voice.

"Not a worry, I just got here myself!" Lily lied. The truth was she'd been waiting for about 20 minutes, it wasn't that he was late, he was early, she just happened to come _extra_ early. She had gone shopping, bought a few new outfits, bought new make up from the muggle world. Truth was, Lily was really excited to see Severus. She was already planning the next time they meet in her mind; they would go shopping together perhaps? Maybe the two of them could learn ballroom dancing together, go have a picnic, talk about _intelligent_ subjects, something James couldn't quite do. The more she thought about it, the more romantic the plans became. Poor Severus didn't have a clue on what she was thinking but he was happy enough to be around her, in fact, he felt _honored. _

The two of them were at the same place they were as the night before, also the same seat. After a few minutes of chatting Severus noticed that her eyes were a bit swollen, usually he would ignore it or make a rather unpleasant comment followed by a cocky smirk but this was Lily. After a short debate with himself he finally decided to ask if anything was wrong. She smiled and opened up about her earlier meeting with James.

"That's really unforgivable." Severus simply said, but it wasn't all that simple. Severus was fuming; he was tempted to get all his Death Eater friends and simply Avada Kedavra the arrogant bastard. And then, it hit him, Lily wasn't living with James at the moment. This was hit moment to score some brownie points.

"Where are you staying right now?" Severus asked curiously.

"In a hotel room," Lily sighed.

Severus was horrified that Lily was staying in a hotel room, it should have been Potter that left to stay in a hotel room instead rather than just throwing her out there.

"Lily, come stay at my house." Severus quickly said.

"I possibly couldn't intrude…" Lily sighed, it was tempting she would have moral support all the time but it was a weird idea to be staying at the home of another man.

"I insist, I refuse to have you simply stay in a hotel. We are friends after all, that's what friends are for." Severus stated, the last bit hurt a tiny bit but this was his chance.

"…Really?" Lily asked a tad bit hopeful about the living arrangements. If Selena heard about this, she would go ballistic and it would probably send James through the roof.

"Well, let's grab a drink to celebrate a new resident in my house." Severus cheerfully said. He needed to get home fast to clean up, a simple spell would do.

"Cheers" Lily smiled as the two of them clinked their pint of beer together. If only James knew, how Severus Snape was slowly becoming a part of Lily's life.

That night the two of them were _smashed_. They both came to conclusion that it would be better to get Lily's belongings at the hotel when they were both sober.

As they arrived at Severus' house Severus gave her his room temporarily. He would sleep in the guest room seeing it was still messy.

"Oh Severus, I love you" Lily giggled through her words.

"I love you more!" Severus said, his words were awfully slurred.

"What if James finds out!" Lily giggled even harder, she was enjoying their pretend secret lovers moment.

"Than we are fucked," Severus said flailing his left arm in the air.

"This is so much fun" Lily said as she sprawled out on the floor. It was true, this was the most fun she had in ages. She felt happier than she was with James; it was like everything was going to be alright. Severus would keep her laughing; he was a supportive friend that every girl needed.

Severus was having a little too much fun, he hadn't opened up like this in a long long time. At one point he started doing impersonations of himself as a teacher at Hogwarts.

"You're silly little behavior is absolutely unacceptable. 20 points from Gryffindor, now back to page 394." Snape barked.

"Leave Gryffindor alone!!' Lily pouted than continued to laugh.

It was already 2:30 in the morning, it was well decided the two of them needed to sleep. Severus guided her to his room and offered to give her something to wear while she slept, she refused politely and said that she would just sleep in some of her clothes. Severus secretly wished that he could share his bed with her, but he really didn't trust himself and she probably wouldn't appreciate the idea.

He went to the kitchen to grab two vials of the hangover potion, he drank his and took the others to where Lily was sleeping. When he knocked on the door, Lily answered the door in nothing but a oversized t-shirt on.

"I..er…hope you don't mind, I found this so I figured that I could use it." She smiled.

Severus took one big gulp, she looked really sexy. Her long slender legs were not hidden and under the t-shirt you could see her beautiful curves. The shirt had fit her really well, he was just fighting hard not to drool and stutter like an idiot.

"I-I-I brought y-you a potion…" Severus said trying really hard not to grab her into his arms and ravish her until no tomorrow. "It's a hangover potion." He gulped again.

"Thank you" She smiled gently as Severus turned and paced towards his room.

"Severus?" Lily called again. Severus took a big gulp and closed his eyes. He finally turned around with a smile on his face.

"Yes, Lily?"

"Thank you for letting me stay." She than blew a kiss good night and pleasantly said she hoped he had sweet dreams.

_More like wet dreams_ Severus quickly thought than paced as fast as he could back to bed.

Lily living here was going to make things very hard for Severus, both figuratively and literally. Whatever was going to happen, he was going to have to fight to not make any moves on Lily.

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a/n: Hope you enjoyed this chapter, R&R please! See you in Chapter 8!


	8. Chapter 8: Morning

One night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone! The chapter I am loading today is rather short (I apologize) I was planning to work on it more but thought that I should update rather than keep you guys waiting. I will be sure to update again tomorrow. So I am sorry for this short chapter, but I hope you like it. I would like to thank **ujemaima, matrice, **and **David Fishwick** for their reviews. I love you guys, really. So as a thank you to them, I will publish this short chapter. I only had a short time because I am off to the gym and off to get drunk and merry, and most likely tonight I will drunkenly finish another chapter and update haha look forward to it.  
Lots of love,

xhanachanx

I do not own Harry Potter.

* * *

Severus woke up in the morning. At first he was wondering where the hell he was, after a while he remembered that he was sleeping in the guestroom. The image of Lily in his old t-shirt (that he never wore) from last night was masturbation material for a week. That shirt was suddenly his favorite shirt.

As he stumbled around the kitchen, he realized it was still 10 A.M. Only 7 hours of sleep, he was exhausted. He was tempted to creep into Lily's room to see if she was awake or sleeping. He would probably have to fight the urge to run his fingers through her lovely red hair and kiss her on her soft lips. Instead he decided to cook bacon and eggs for breakfast with slices of bread on the side.

As Lily was lying in bed she was awoken to something smelling awfully good, her appetite had finally returned. She clumsily stumbled out the bedroom to the dining room, the hangover potion worked wonders on her. As she finally found the dining room she caught a quick glimpse of Severus who was just in his trousers. She quickly blushed but couldn't help but peak through her fingers. After a few seconds of peeking, her hands slowly slide down her face; she couldn't keep her eyes off Severus. He no longer was a teenager; he had a body of a man. Lily felt a strong urge to touch and rub Severus' body _everywhere._ After a while of staring she noticed that he had a bandage wrapped around his arm, she wondered what it was.

When Severus walked in the dining room with 2 plates in his hands he was completely unaware that Lily was sitting there. He gave a small jump and nearly dropped the plates on the floor.

"Lily!" Severus quickly said "you're up!"

"Good morning," Lily smiled. Little did Severus know that Lily was fighting the urge of sneaking a peek of his package.

"I made us some breakfast. I hope you're okay with eggs." He said has he placed a plate in front of her. He suddenly became very aware that he was just in his trousers, it was a habit of his.

"Oh wow Sev, this looks delicious!"  
Severus sighed in relief, his cooking was approved of.

Severus noticed Lily quickly glance at his trousers, he blushed.

"I'm really sorry," he said gesturing to his trousers. "I'm used to walking around the house like this. I'll be right back to put some clothes on. I apologize if I made you uncomfortable."

Lily slightly drooled at the idea of Severus walking around in his underwear all day.

"Oh no, it's alright. Please live like you normally would." Lily quickly said.  
"But…" Severus tried to continue but was interrupted.

"You haven't complained about me walking around like this!" Lily gestured to her in his shirt.

_What kind of man would stop you _Severus wondered to himself.

"So it would only be fair." Lily finally said. "Plus I trust you not to try anything." In a way she felt like she was challenging him to do something. She curiously wondered what would happen if he did. Would she fight it? Most likely not…or would she? She started to think of James and there was another tiny clench from her heart.

"_I don't trust myself." _Severus quietly muttered.

"Hm?" Lily finally snapped out of her brief James moment.

"You're absolutely right," Severus put on his most convincing smile. Severus could not stop staring at his shirt on her. She looked surprisingly sexy, well _anything_ would look good on Lily. He would give anything to slide off the shirt and make sweet love to her on the dining room table.

Severus couldn't help that the two of them eating together in the morning made him feel like they were a cheerful married couple. He wondered what was going t happen with James. While talking to her, she had made it clear that she still had feelings for James. It had hurt Severus quite a bit. The bloody tool always got what he wanted. He wished for a moment that he was James.

As Severus was looking down at his eggs, Lily stole a few glances at Severus' body once again. He was looking good, although she was curious about his arm being bandaged.

"What happened there?" Lily curiously asked about his arm.

Severus was about to open his mouth and explain that he was hiding his dark mark but than realized that Lily's reaction would not be good and most likely their friendship would end there again.

"I had a really nasty burn," Severus lied. "From brewing one of my potions" he added without missing a beat.

Lily made a sad face which made him feel awful about lying to her. He prayed that she would not find out, ever.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, are you alright?" Lily asked, you could tell that she was quite worried.

Severus hated his dark mark more than ever, it was not exactly the most appealing thing to most people unless you are a proud pureblood. Most people would be terrified if they saw it.

Severus began to stress out, he wondered how he was going to go for a meeting and he what he would tell her whenever he was going to leave. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He needed an excuse fast.

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A/N: R&R Lots of love! See you next chapter!


	9. Chapter 9: James

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone, here is chapter 9, the chapter that I wrote while I was drunk. I surprisingly did a lot better than I expected, maybe I should drink before I write fanfiction...  
I would like to thank **matrice **and **David Fishwick** for their wonderful reviews. Thanks :) I would like to clarify that at this point Severus isn't a spy, he is still in the phase of his life where he is following Voldy.

Anyways, enjoy chapter 9! And remember, **R&R** please!  
I don't own Harry Potter.

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James Potter slowly slid down in his chair, he was in shock. Lily had already made plans for a date. In fact, she already had two! Selena had already informed him that the first date was a handsome young man named Cambyses, who apparently could pass as a _Witches Weekly _model. This already made James jealous; James had always had a competitive streak so he felt the need to one up her. But he didn't know where to start. Maybe if he slept with her sister Petunia? No, she seemed to have a thing for bigger men, James certainly was not her type. Not that he wanted to be, he probably wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole.

James was very curious who Lily's second date was, Selena seemed not to know, so maybe Lily was just lying to make him jealous. But apparently it was someone they knew from school. Maybe it was that boy Alexander Sergius from Ravenclaw, the two always seemed to get along _too _well for James' liking. When James asked Remus, he simply stated that he hadn't heard from Lily since Friday morning. James was beginning to worry, was Lily getting on without him? Not it possibly couldn't be, she couldn't possibly live without him. She was a good catch; it wouldn't be hard for her to find a good man once she moved on. But she was head over heels for James; she couldn't possibly get over him in…4 days.

It bugged James that Remus was staying neutral throughout the entire thing, we he was happy that he could still be friends with Remus. They had been so close, they were best of friends; they were called the Marauders for Merlin's sake. At least James had Sirius; he had urged James to move on. Peter was by James' side, he was trying his best to make James pleased. James acted as if nothing was wrong but he was hurt be his own decision, but he was too proud to ask for Lily back.

James realized that he needed to stop thinking of her in order to move on. But that didn't mean James did not miss her.

He really missed her.

***  
Before Lily was to go get her stuff from her hotel room, she and Severus decided to talk of plans.

Severus offered to help Lily move the stuff she had in her hotel room into the house; she politely refused and said she could do it herself. So in the meantime, Severus decided this would be a good time to clean his room that Lily was staying in so there would be more room for her stuff. As soon as she apparated to the hotel, he ran into his room and saw the t-shirt that she was wearing earlier. He paced over to the shirt and held it in his arms; he could smell her sweet fragrance. After about a minute, he realized it was time to get to work.

By the time Lily had returned she was very surprised to see the room Severus had lent her clean. He even made her bed! As she walked over to the bed she saw that he had even left a vase full of lilies for her.

Looking at Severus Snape one would never guess that he could at times be a bit of a cheese ball. He was clumsy but he made up for it with the occasional romantic gestures. He knew the lilies he left for Lily would make her happy. Was he right? Of course. He also left a potion to make the room have a sweet scent of vanilla; the room was now slightly more feminine.

When Severus left the guestroom, which was now his room, he saw Lily pull a small suitcase into her room.

"Is that all?" Severus raised his eyebrow, she didn't bring much.

"Yeah," Lily smiled. When she had originally packed her stuff, she had hoped that her and James would have gotten back together by now. She had realized at some point, she would have to go back to get the rest of her stuff from her old place. She was slowly starting to acknowledge that maybe things weren't meant to be between her and James. But because she was aware of this, it didn't mean she wanted to understand, she wanted to pretend that nothing was wrong. It was almost easier that way. She was still deeply hurt, at times it felt like she couldn't breathe. She just wanted this to be one big sick joke, she wanted to sit on the floor of the corner of the room and cry.

She needed to move on whether she liked it or not. It was no use to drag things on, and in order to move on she needed to cut contact with him. So she decided to send James one last owl, the moment she sent it, she regretted it. She couldn't stop crying.

When James received the owl from Lily, he was pretty excited, he felt relieved to hear from her. But when he opened the letter he was in for a surprise.

"Well, read it." Sirius loudly said.

James was in so much pain he couldn't say a word, his mouth opened but nothing could come out. Sirius just sighed and snatched it from his hands and decided to read the letter out loud.

"_Dear James,_" Sirius read as Peter looked at him with his eyes wide open, curious to know what the contents of the letter were.

"_This will be the last memory you have of me. After yesterday, I realized that you were right. It was time I moved on, I send this letter to ask you to ignore my letters from now on. I will head over there to get my stuff soon. Please and thank you. Goodbye._To James' surprise Lily had turned the tables on him. It now seemed like Lily was dumping him.

Signed,

Lily Evans."

"Harsh" Sirius said grabbing himself another coffee.  
"It's alright…you'll find someone better." Peter added while nibbling on a piece of biscuit.

"That's right James!" Sirius exclaimed.  
"Remember in Hogwarts, you were pretty popular with the girls. You could get any girl you want, it's her loss if she doesn't want to be with you." He added.

"Yeah" James silently said staring off into space. When Sirius read the letter to James it hurt him. It suddenly all became very real to him. It was like it was him that couldn't live without Lily.

As positive as Sirius tried to stay, he knew that James was hurt. Lily was a beautiful woman; they were both made for each other. She was always a gentle person that everyone admired; she was like a mother to everyone. Sirius quietly wished that the two of them would work things out but he needed James to feel better, it was almost like James was broken. He had never seen a man look as distraught as James did.

***

When Severus found Lily, he found her sitting on the floor sobbing. Helping people stop crying was not his specialty; he took a deep breath and hoped that he could succeed.

"Lily…" Severus gently called to her sitting at her side. Lily continued to sob as her put his arm on her back.

"I don't know why things had to be like this." She sobbed uncontrollably  
"Everything was supposed to be perfect, he didn't tell me anything was wrong!"

Severus brought her for a hug and uncomfortably gave her a pat on the back; she rested her head against his chest and let out another wail.

"He didn't give us a chance," she continued. "We were going to have children together, we were supposed to grow old together, and now I have _nothing_." Severus cringed at the idea of James Potter reproducing. There didn't need to be any more of James Potter in the world, if anything there needed to be less.

"H-H-He doesn't want to be with anyone. I need to move on but I don't want to. I'm afraid; he's the best I will ever have. Yeah other men want me, but they only want to fuck me. I want to be _loved_." She continued through her tears. Severus had to fight the urge to tell her how much he loved her but, hepushed the thought aside.

"Lily, don't you dare say that you can't get any better." Severus said. What the fuck was James Potter doing, it was like he was slowly killing her self esteem over the years. The Lily he grew up with was always a confident young woman.  
"He isn't a man if he can't treat someone he loves with respect." Severus angrily said. He hated seeing how hurt Lily was, how could any man do this to her, how _dare _he! What Severus had said made Lily's heart hurt because she knew it was true. She grabbed onto his chest and continued to cry away while Severus soothingly stroked her hair.

Severus was pretty happy; Lily Evans was in _his_ arms, he was _touching_ her all while James Potter was probably with some bimbo to make himself feel more intelligent. For once, Severus had won.

That night Severus prepared a nice dinner in hopes to get Lily's spirits up. She didn't seem to eat that much, it actually worried Severus a bit. He noticed that Lily had a bit of trouble keeping food down, it was probably the stress. He decided that it may actually be a good idea to brew a potion to help her keep things down. It tore Severus apart because it was like Lily's body was reacting to the loss of James; it was like she couldn't live without bloody James fucking Potter.

Lily was exhausted from all the crying she did that day and decided to call it a night early. She wished Severus a good night and went into her room. Severus rubbed his temples, she almost seemed broken. He wondered if there was anything he could do to make her feel better; perhaps brewing a potion that would make her happy? No that would be disrespectful to her. Take her out for more drinking? No in the end she may become an alcoholic. After a few debates in his head he finally came to conclusion that doing small things would probably make her happy.

***  
The next morning, Lily, who was no longer sleeping in Severus' t-shirt to his disappointment, asked him a favor over breakfast.

"It would depend on what kind of favor" Severus asked. But deep down inside he would do anything she wanted him to do whether he liked it or not.

"Well," Lily began than took a deep breath. "I was hoping that you could come with me when I would go get my stuff from home. You know, for moral support."

Severus sighed in relief; she wasn't going to ask him to help her get back with Potter. Speaking of which, she seemed a lot better than she did last night.

"Of course," Severus smirked. "I'll help you pack if you need me to."  
This made Lily happy, things would go by quickly and he would probably help her stay on track.

"Great, I was thinking tomorrow around 1 we would go, James will not be back till 5 so we would have plenty of time." Lily smiled.

Severus nodded, he was a tad bit nervous of the off chance that James might be there, but Severus was an adult now. He needed to be brave whether he liked it or not, for Lily's sake. Severus had encountered many fearful situations with no problem as a Death Eater, but anything that had to do with James Potter caused him to be afraid like nothing had before. Severus gently reminded himself that the chances of Potter being there was as low as Lily loving him back.  
"After last night, I figure I need to move on." Lily finally said. "I'm done shedding my tears; it's time for me to move on." She smiled.

Severus was extremely pleased to hear this. It was something he was slightly praying for over the past few days. This also meant that Lily's appetite would probably return over the next while.

Lily and Severus went through the plans that night, she would give him the stuff as he would put them in the boxes and she would probably be throwing some stuff out. Once they had everything packed, they would leave. And before they left, she would place her key on the dining room table.

Lily both feared and dreaded the next day. It was going to require a large amount of concentration and she would have to move fast. Just thinking about it made her sick, tomorrow was going to be a long day.

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A/N: Thanks for reading, see you next chapter. Please review!! Hope you enjoying the story so far!


	10. Chapter 10: Voldy

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone here's chapter 10! I hope people enjoy this chapter, I would like to thank **David Fishwick**, **matrice**, and **starsmile** for their reviews! Made me want to update faster haha So I am updating right away! I love you guys!!

Please read and review!  
I don't own HP...no making money for me.

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When Lily woke up in the morning she felt like she was going to vomit, her stomach started flip flopping at the thought of James. She had a dream of James apologizing and the two of them getting back together, she really wished that she was living in that dream instead of real life. Today was the day she was going to get her stuff and after today, she will never go back to the place she once called home ever again. She'll never wake up to James smiling at her in their bed. She felt sick, she felt anxious about today. A tear rolled down her face as she remembered the days how James would practically force his feelings on her and she would hate it. Is this how it felt to love someone who wouldn't love you back? Another tear trickled down her face, it was really over and the next time she was going to see James when they were going to meet with a divorce lawyer. Lily was surprised James hadn't contacted a lawyer yet; maybe he already contacted one and forged her signature in fear that she wouldn't sign it.

Lily felt herself gag; the stress was really getting to her. She quickly ran into the bedroom only to have a little bit of vomit come out. The stress induced vomiting was really becoming exhausting, she needed to stop. As she headed towards the dining room, she passed by Severus' room, the door was slightly cracked open, she slowly peeked in and saw that Severus was not in his room. She couldn't help but notice that he had a rather large book collection, something she was interested in. She decided that it would be best to head towards the dining room before Severus caught her sticking her head far into his room. When she arrived to the dining room she saw a pink colored drink in her cup she read a small note with Severus' scribbling on it. When she read it she couldn't help but smile, Severus always had a look on his face that made things clear that he didn't care about anything. But that same man had noticed that she was having trouble keeping food down, he really cared for her. He even wrote down that he would be back by 9 in the morning and there was food she could help herself to in the fridge. Although she still loved James, she was beginning to notice feelings rising for Severus. Was it because he had been there for her when she needed someone the most? Lily didn't know what to do with her feelings, she was afraid of simply just using Severus as a rebound. But she wanted someone to make her feel loved or cared for and Severus did. Lily was wondering where Severus was off to, it was still 6 AM, which meant 3 hours to herself. Lily knew that her current emotional state was not a good idea to be alone; she needed something to distract her. Suddenly, the bookshelves full of books in Severus' room came into her head.

***

Severus Snape was not happy. At 4 in the freaking morning his arm started glowing, the fucking dark lord summoned him. At least he could hide the look of disdain behind his mask. Before he left he left a note for Lily just in case she woke up before he came back. He left the potion for her that he made before he went to sleep that night before apparating. When he arrived he noticed some other Death Eaters, he could hear some of them yawning. Some of them were whispering about the possible reasons the Dark Lord had summoned them. Severus figured that it was the Dark Lord just being paranoid again, he probably thought that some homeless muggle was actually a wizard in disguise plotted the downfall of the Dark Lord. Severus continued to think of other possibilities but Voldemort being paranoid was the only thing that seemed to convince him the most.

As soon as Voldemort entered, the room instantly fell silent.

"Welcome," Voldemort hissed. "I have gathered you all for a very important reason" he said as he slowly paced around.

_No shit _Severus thought to himself.

"I have recently discovered from a source that Albus Dumbledore is starting to for a group to plot my down fall."

_Must be Quirinus Quirrell _Severus noted to himself.

"It's going to be called _the Order of the Phoenix_." Voldemort continued, "We need to start recruiting to our side, I sense a war coming."

"That's a brilliant idea, master." Bellatrix purred.  
Severus couldn't help but think how much of a suck up she was. Although married to Rudolphus Lestrange, she always seemed to come onto someone.

"I'll be sure to keep a closer eye on Dumbledore, master" Severus said.  
Voldemort was very pleased by this idea.

"Splendid," Voldemort let out a smile. "I would like to speak to you privately, everyone else is dismissed." Severus was starting to miss his comfortable bed more.

***

Lily was running her finger on the spine of all the books Severus had stashed on his bookshelf. She was nearly squealing with joy. She hadn't seen this many books since Hogwarts, James wasn't exactly a huge fan of reading, he preferred sports.

She began flipping through pages and reading a few pages of each book that was available. The fact Severus enjoyed reading as much as she did was almost a turn on. He was intelligent and enjoyed studying as much as she did in Hogwarts. Lily found one particular book that she thought looked rather interesting; it was a book on how to brew various types of potions and the meaning behind the name of each potion. She carried the book to the living room and laid on the couch the skim through the list of potions. When she opened the book there were many that she had never even heard of before, she couldn't help but notice that on many of the pages, Severus had crossed out some of the ingredients and changed it or add foot notes.

When she flipped the page, she found a picture that was faced down. Out of curiosity she flipped it over, expecting a really dorky picture of Severus. Instead it was a picture of another woman. In the picture, Severus and the other woman were embracing each other and she gave a rather intimate kiss to Severus, a gesture that made Lily a bit jealous inside. She was actually jealous! The woman had long chestnut brown hair, her smile was beautiful. Lily had always seen Severus Snape look rather miserable most of the time, when she saw the loving smile Severus had given the woman in the photo, it made her jealous. No Lily had to stop she had to stop! She was developing feelings for Severus; it wasn't fair to Severus for her to suddenly love him. She took a deep breath; she couldn't keep her eyes off the photo. The gentle smile Severus gave was shocking; she could see the look of love in his eyes. He looked beautiful, so handsome, she wanted to somehow get into the photo and steal him. Lily looked up and around to confirm that no one was actually around, once she was sure, she gently smiled and kissed the photo of Severus. Just then she heard a loud crack from Severus' bedroom, Lily quickly hid the picture in her pocket.

Severus was exhausted; it was 8:45 in the morning, which meant he was gone for nearly 5 hours. He gently pulled his mask off and replayed the conversation between him and the Dark Lord just had.

"Severus, you are one of my most trusted servants, not to mention one of my favorite." Voldemort grinned.

"Thank you master," Severus bowed.

"I would like you to continue to keep an eye on Dumbledore, tell me additional information if you find out. However, do not mention that you know of the Order of the Phoenix." Voldemort coyly said as sliding down cozily on his leather chair.

"Understood master," Severus gave another bow.

As Severus continued to undress he was interrupted by a beautiful voice.

"Severus!" He heard her yell; he could hear her coming towards his room.

_Shit!_ Severus was still in his Death Eater robes, he rushed them off as fast as he could. He could hear her getting closer and closer. He couldn't be caught wearing the robes, he had to hide them or else…She just can't find out! What was he going to tell her if she asked where he was?

_Merlin's beard! _Severus muttered under his breath as he shoved his robes in a nearby dresser. He began frantically searching for his usual robes. Hogwarts. Yes! He'll tell her he had an early staff meeting at Hogwarts!

"Severus! You're back!" Lily exclaimed as she slammed the door open on poor Severus while he was still in his trunks.

"Hi Lily…" Severus flushed, he felt like he was 15 all over again.

"Oh…I'm sorry…" Lily blushed. She ran over because she was really excited that he was back home, she was nervous that Severus would notice that she had a certain picture of his but he hadn't seemed like he noticed so far. She just had to make sure he was distracted enough so he didn't notice.  
"Sorry, I was just going to grab a quick nap before we left to get your stuff." Severus said quickly sliding into the covers.

Both Severus and Lily were too busy trying to conceal something to notice the other was trying to hide something.

"I'll be sure to wake up before it's time" Severus grinned nervously. Things were okay so far, she hadn't even asked where he went.

"Oh sure, see you in a few hours!" Lily smiled. As she left the room she instantly realized that Severus could be trying to look for the photo before or after his nap. She panicked, she quickly ran back towards his room. She slammed the door open yet again.

"Is it time already?" Severus grumbled.

"No no! Keep sleeping! I…er…well…" Lily stuttered. She desperately needed an excuse to keep an eye on him. "I…er…decided to join you for your nap!" She couldn't believe what she was saying.

"What?" Severus sat up in shock. This must be a crazy dream.

"I'm going to join you!" Lily smiled innocently.

"I…I…er…ok." Severus stuttered, he didn't know what to say. This was turning out to be a wonderful dream.

"Do you have anything I could wear; I er…don't feel like leaving this room quite yet!" She quickly added. She didn't want to get his bed dirty, also that way if she did actually fall asleep the picture wouldn't slip out of her jeans pocket by accident.

"Er…Yeah." Severus slowly got out of his bed and walked towards the dresser. He had to stop himself because that's where his Death Eater robes were. Instead he opened one of his drawers and found an old dress shirt of his.

"This is all I have" Severus held it up.

"Perfect!" Lily said and snatched it out of his hands. She really didn't care at this moment; she was surprised that Severus wasn't eyeing her like she was crazy yet. It must be the lack of sleep; things were going well for Lily.

"I'll change into something as well…" Severus muttered. He wasn't used to sleeping in something other than his underwear for a long time.

"Oh no, just stay in bed. Whatever you do, do not leave the bed." Lily commanded. She was afraid that he would notice something different, that something was missing. "Turn away for a bit while I change!" She added.

Severus turned away without a complaint; he wanted to sneak a peek. Lily Evans was undressing in his room.

_This must be a dream_ Severus thought to himself. Severus slightly flinched as he felt Lily's warm body slide up against his.

"Just a quick hug!" Lily smiled. She was being so suspicious and she knew it, she was just happy Severus hadn't questioned her behavior yet. Severus on the other hand was fighting hard to keep his junior down. Lily was still holding him tightly, she had trouble letting go. She loved touching his chest; she was beginning to have quite a sexual attraction to Severus. She slowly started to rub his body; she couldn't help herself it was like her body already knew what it was doing.

At this point Severus was 100% sure that it was a dream. Lily Evans would never do this, nothing like this would ever happen to him in real life.

Severus turned around and locked eyes with her. They were inseparable now, Severus brushed his hand against her cheek and ran his fingers through her hair, the two of them continued to stare at each other. Severus pulled her body closer to his. Lily closed her eyes as she felt the warm sensation of his lips slowly licking and kissing her neck. She nearly let out a moan of pleasure as his hands were running over her body. Her body was hot, she felt like she was on fire.

James couldn't make her feel this riled up, Severus cared for her pleasure, and it was sensual. She let out smalls gasps of pleasure as she gently ran her hands down Severus' back.

Severus liked the way his arms fit around her, how she perfectly fit against his body.

"Severus" Lily gasped in pleasure, she ached to have him. Her hands wandered his chest feeling the strength of a man she could only dream about. Each kiss he gave was soft and tender, and each touch was like an electric current went through her body.

Suddenly Severus stopped.

"I'm sorry," he quickly said and sat up. He knew what he was doing was really wrong, it wasn't a dream it was reality.

"It must be too early for you" He smiled sadly at her. Lily was in shock, she wanted more but her heart was aching because of James. She hated that Severus was right, it was indeed too early.  
"I don't want to treat you like you are just a piece of meat." He finally said after a few minutes of silence. "I truly do care about you, and I will wait if you need me to." Severus finally added.

Lily was touched by his words, she was a bit bummed that he stopped but he respected her, it was clear that he truly cared about her. She immediately jumped into Severus' arms and started sobbing again.

"Thank you" She whispered.

"Don't thank me," he gently whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair.

In the end, Severus didn't get his sleep but he was happy with the way things were going.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chappie! Read and review! See you next chapter!


	11. Chapter 11: Packing

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone, sorry to make you wait for an update. I was out traveling (again.) But I am back! I don't think anyone knows how happy I was to see the reviews I got, I was bragging to people who in turn told me they didn't care. But I was happy. I would like say a special thanks to **matrice**, **starsmile**, **ujemaima**, **David boreanaz's wife247** and **David Fishwick**. Thank you for your kind reviews; you guys give me the drive to update! I'm trying not to write anything too crazy because I am for an unknown reason watching a fat kid dance while rubbing whip cream on his nipple. Anyways, enough from me. Enjoy the new chapter.

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Severus had minimal sleep earlier that day; he was still wondering whether or not he should join Lily who was resting on his bed. Severus was a little miffed at himself at how he completely cock blocked himself. Opportunities like that were very rare for Severus, especially with a beauty like Lily Evans. It was like he said no to receive the grand prize for the lottery. Such an opportunity would most likely never come again, especially because he stopped in the middle of things. He couldn't go through with it not only because he realized it wasn't a dream but also because he had respect for her. His lack of sleep was making it harder for him to be a bit enthusiastic; also his lack of release didn't make things easier. It was a well known fact that if a man hasn't blown his load in over 72 hours, he will no longer pretend to give a shit about your feelings. Lily was different though, he wanted to care for her, love her like no one else ever had. Severus took everything in him to be less bitter than his usual self. Severus could feel the presence of blue balls kicking in, he needed to relax. Lily was comfortably resting beside him, Severus was afraid that she was going to leave if he fell asleep, he didn't want to go through losing her all over again. Severus gently brushed aside a strand of hair from her face.

Severus sighed; he started to feel himself throb. He felt the rush of wanting her, her smell and touch lingered on his body. He craved to feel her against his body again, he wanted to take her and make her so satisfied that she would never think of any other man again. He stared at her soft, lips that were full, pink and kissable. He craved her touch, to have her hands to run down his back again while moaning in ecstasy. Severus shifted uncomfortably so his boxers wouldn't become a tent. He continued to fight the urge of wanting to touch Lily _everywhere_. Things were becoming very hard (pun intended), Severus took another deep breath and decided that he needed to take care of things and left to the bathroom.

As Severus arrived at the bathroom he slowly slid off his boxers and hopped into the shower, he gently rubbed his erect member and let out a shudder of pleasure. He could feel himself throbbing harder and harder, he wanted to cum. Severus' breathing had become shallow and he let out a moan of pleasure as he gripped on tighter and stroked faster. It hadn't taken long for Severus to finish, he hadn't had a release in a while and the semi-action he had earlier didn't help.

When Severus had finished his shower, he saw that it was still 11, which meant that he still had a few hours to catch up and sleep. A little sleep wouldn't hurt. He quietly and carefully slid under the sheets and felt Lily's leg brush up against his. The last thing he saw before he closed his eyes was the face of an angel, his beloved Lily Evans.

Severus was awakened by an owl flapping his beautiful golden brown wings in his face. Severus turned to see that it was 1:45 and groaned in agony, there was 30 more minutes that he could have had for his pleasant but short nap.

"What is it now?" Severus' tired, dry voice whispered towards the owl. Lily was still sleeping and he had no intentions of waking her up until it was time to go. Severus noticed a rolled parchment the owl had delivered for him. His arm stretched out to take the piece of parchment, it was from Bellatrix. He let out a groan and wondered what in the world she wanted from him.

_Dear Severus,_

_During today's meeting I found it thoroughly impressive of your willing to help with the Dark Lord. I would appreciate it if you came to my mansion so we could discuss matters of the Lord and ways we could help him succeed his role as the ultimate ruler of the wizarding world. Please come sometime after 3._

_Signed,_

_Bellatrix Lestrange_

Severus let out another groan; he really did not want to spend time with that girl. It was pretty obvious that she had gotten a house elf to write the letter for her, because it was in no way possible that she could write so politely. The owl continued to sit there waiting for Severus to write a reply, while Severus slipped out of bed to grab a fresh piece of parchment to write his reply. Bellatrix being the sister-in-law of Lucius and a fellow death eater, he knew that this was something he couldn't simply decline to.

_Dear Bellatrix Lestrange, _Severus started.

_Thank you for your kind letter, I would be happy to attend a meeting regarding our loyalty to our Lord and how we can help him succeed. I will be over tomorrow night around 4:30 in the evening._

_Severus Snape_

He hastily handed the parchment over to the Owl who immediately flew away after he received Severus' reply. The moment the Owl had flown away, Severus regretted even replying in the first place. Since it was nearing 2:00 he figured that waking Lily up early may be a good idea.

"Lily" Severus gently called as he rubbed her back. Lily let out a gentle groan and went back to sleep.

"Lily" Severus called out again.

"James…" Lily mumbled. Severus' heart suddenly clenched in pain, it was painful to know that the woman you had deeply loved for most of your life, had loved someone who happened to be your worst enemy.

"Lily" Severus sighed this time, he gently shook her.

"James," Lily groaned out again. "I'm not in the mood for that right now. Get back to sleep" she mumbled as she pushed Severus away.

Severus' blood was now boiling knowing that the man he absolutely loathed was invading Lily's mind. The thought that Potter had laid his hands on Lily made him even angrier. Severus took a deep breath desperately trying to keep his voice as calm as possible.

"Lils, its Severus." He finally said. He hadn't called her that in a long time.

Lily's eyes shot wide open, she immediately realized that she had mistaken Severus for James.

"I...um...I thought that you were um…well…Oh my god…I…" Lily desperately tried to explain but was way too embarrassed to form a real sentence. Severus immediately burst into a fit of laughter. It was highly entertaining seeing Lily Evans, someone who was so well put together not being able to form a sentence.

Lily was surprised by Severus' laughter.

_The woman in the picture must have really changed him _Lily jealously thought to herself. When the two of them were growing up he was more of a darker boy. Suddenly, she remembered that she was supposed to be guarding Severus from finding the photo that she had found. She quickly confirmed that the photo was still safely stored away in her jeans pocket. It didn't look like Severus had quite noticed that it was missing yet.

"It's time to get going," Severus gently smiled at her.

Lily's heart sank, she was most definitely not ready for this, maybe in a few years she will look back on this day as a great day, or maybe James was waiting for her to come back. Lily was hoping that James would realize how much he missed her, which was the only thing Lily looked forward to.

_There's a slight possibility that James would be at home waiting for me. I bet he's anxiously waiting so he can take me back! _Lily told herself, but it wasn't like she was in a Jane Austen novel where things seemed to always work out for the heroine in the end. This was reality; she needed to work for things herself. So before they left, Lily quickly cast a quick glamour charm.

When Lily had come out of the bathroom, Severus was amazed at how beautiful she was, however he knew all too well why Lily had cast a glamour charm. It was to get that damned Potters attention in case he was home. Severus could also smell the sweet perfume Lily had on her, whatever it was, it smelled amazing. Little did he know that Lily had worn it so, when she finally packed all her stuff and left, the lingering smell could make James think of her even more.

"You look _beautiful_," Severus finally said aloud. Lily felt sexy again; after Severus had stopped himself she didn't feel that wanted .She questioned whether she had said something to upset him. However, his compliment towards her made her feel good again. Oddly enough, Severus' view was very important to her.

Once they had apparated into Lily's old home, she took a deep breath. Everything still the same, there was the familiar smell to the place she once called home. However, Lily knew that now was not the time to feel nostalgic, she needed to pack.

Severus looked around to see the trail of James Potter. There were pictures of James with his friends, some with Lily, lots of Quidditch jerseys and autographs from famous Quidditch players. To Severus' disgust he saw a picture of Lily and James happily holding each other and smiling towards the camera, it made Severus sick. He was very tempted to tear it in half and keep the end with Lily on it and burn the end with Potter on it. The smile she had given to the camera was a beautiful, almost angelic smile that could probably make someone with so much chaos feel at ease. Severus was brought back to reality by a soft sob. He quickly turned around to see Lily clutching a sweater to her chest while sobbing uncontrollably.

It was the sweater Lily had gotten for James when the two of them first started dating. That day, James had tore off what he had on and quickly put on the new sweater and gave her a sheepish grin. He wore it almost every day when she first gave it to him until his mother angrily zapped on a different sweater for hygienic reasons.

"Lils…" Severus sighed. It was clear that the sweater held sentimental values and she could not let go.

"I wonder if James would still wear it if I left it for him." She sniffled. Severus wasn't sure what to say, comforting someone was not his area of expertise.

"Toss it" Severus said blankly.

Lily shook her head and took a deep breath to consume the smell of James from the sweater, it brought back more memories and more tears.

Severus took a deep breath, it was clear that this was going to take a lot longer than it was planned. The two of them had underestimated exactly how difficult this was going to be.

"What about this?" Severus held up a small jewelry box above the waste bin.

Lily let out another wail of despair. It was clear that tossing it was not an option.

"He gave that to me last year" Lily hiccupped through the tears. Severus awkwardly put it down like it was tainted all the sudden. Potter had specifically chosen that jewelry box for her. Severus gave out another sigh; this was going way too fast for her.

"How about this," Severus started "I'll pack up all the things for you while you go down and leave the key on the dining room table like you said you would." Lily gave a look of fear for a moment.

"Do not worry, I will not discard anything" He added.

"I-I'm really sorry Severus…" Lily started.

"Do not apologize." Severus simply stated. She really had nothing to be sorry about.

"No, I really am. Most people wouldn't put up with all this crying I've done, thank you." She said as she left the room.

"I would do anything for you" Severus muttered quietly enough so Lily could not hear him as she left the room.

Severus took a look around and gave a flick of his wand as items sorted themselves into boxes. Some of the things that crept into the boxes made him flush; he had seen everything from bras, panties to lingerie that was obviously used for more than just casual wear. Suddenly there was a rather loud cracking sound and a flash of green light.

James Potter had apparated into the room.

***

When James had arrived home, he was surprised to find someone very familiar in his home.

"Well, well, well." James looked at Severus in disgust.

"If it isn't old Snivellus," James slowly paced around Severus. Severus slowly slid his hand in his robe to grab his wand just to be safe, with James Potter you could never tell what he was going to do. James quickly turned around and pushed Severus against the wall. He pointed his wand to his face.

"What are you doing in my home?" James angrily said pushing the wand closer to his face.

"I'm helping Lily, Potter." Severus spat as he pushed James off of him. "Get your wand away from my face unless you want to deal with the ministry later for assault."

"Helping Lily? Last I heard, she wouldn't even talk to a freak like you." James laughed that was close to a cackle. "She really did herself a favor by getting rid of you."

"You'd be surprised; I'm taking my role as a man unlike certain people." Severus spat back and gave a small smirk.

"You always liked to stick your abnormally large nose into other people's business don't you Snivellus?"

"Why you arrogant piece of…" Severus angrily returned with his wand but was interrupted.

"_Everte Statum!_" James nearly hissed as Severus was thrown against the wall.

James was in a horrible mood than usual, as an Auror he had put up with so much shit that day, so much that his boss felt sorry for him and sent him home early. Snivellus breaking and entering into his home was more than enough, and on top of that, with LILY.

"_Confundo!" _Severus yelled but missed. Severus had not been prepared for his reunion with his childhood bully. Clearly, this man had not grown up.

***

Lily slowly walked down the stairs; this was probably going to be the last time she was going to be in this house. She smiled to herself with the fond memories that the place had given her. She wanting and needing to move on. She walked into the dining room and left the key to the house on the table. As she was walking away, she gave a quick halt. She closed her eyes, turned around and headed back to the table. Tears started flowing out as she looked at her hand with her wedding band on. She slowly slid it off her finger as more and more tears came out. She squeezed it in her hand momentarily and then, left it on the table along with the key. This was it; this was her way of moving on. Suddenly she heard a rather large CRACK upstairs; she became very worried and ran up the steps. She was worried that Severus had injured himself, or broke something. When she came running towards the door, to her surprise James was there. Just before she was about to get up and run up to him, Severus spoke.

"Why you arrogant piece of…" Severus was angry, Lily didn't know why but she couldn't move. Suddenly James yelled a spell that sent Severus flying against the wall.

"Sto-" Lily went to yell but was interrupted by Severus throwing another spell back that missed.

"_Duro!" _James yelled but luckily Severus had dodged the spell.

"St-" Lily tried to continue but went unnoticed by the two again. James quickly walked up to Severus and grabbed him by the neck of his shirt.

"You keep your damn hands off Lily, you sick freak." James said pointing his wand in Severus' face yet again. "Freaks don't have happy endings." James gave another laugh.

"That's enough!" Lily finally yelled. Both James and Severus gave a quick jump to the fiery red heads voice. Lily quickly walked over to the two of them and pushed James off Severus.

"I can't believe you James" Lily finally snapped. What had she seen in him? She believed that he had matured but the man hadn't at all. "Are you alright Sev?" Lily gently asked Severus.

"What are you two lovebirds?" James disgustingly spat, suddenly it came to him. "I see. So it was Snivellus that was your second date, how charming."

"What?" Severus blurted out, him and Lily on a _date_? Oh he wish it were true.

"Yes!" Lily fiercely replied as she clung on to his arm defensively. "It was very lovely, and he was more of a gentleman that you ever will be."

Severus was very confused at this point, Lily Evans was praising him. She was saying that he was better than James Potter! How marvelous!

"Oh how cute! Why don't you two already move in together, clearly you guys are _so _in love!" James sarcastically said.

"We are! In fact," Lily glared back at James "we already share the same bed with each other. Come on Sev, let's go back _home_."

"Why you greasy little git" James angrily gritted through his teeth. The truth was James was in shock, had Lily truly moved on without him? Reality was starting to sink in, but James couldn't lose he wanted to win.

"Filthy whore" He spat out as Lily apparated away. Severus stormed towards James and got in his face.

"Do you know what this is?" Severus angrily whispered as he pulled up his sleeve to slightly reveal his dark mark. "You need to be more careful, otherwise, a few of us may happen to _drop _in." Severus gave a cold smirk than apparated as James Potter slowly sank down onto the floor in surprise. Snivellus had just stood up to him and James just took it without retaliating.

As Severus apparated back and went towards Lily he nearly tripped on one of the boxes with Lily's stuff.

"That arrogant coward!" Lily angrily said shoving the majority of the stuff in a garbage bag. "To think that I once loved him is unbelievable!"

Severus was a tad bit surprised, Lily had so much trouble throwing stuff away, and now, she was doing it like it was no problem at all.

"I'm really sorry for dragging you in like that Severus."

"Please don't apologize, I simply wish for the best for you." He smiled back as he brushed a strand of hair away from her face. For once in his life, he was better than James Potter.

"Thank you Severus, that means so much to me." She said holding both of his hands and that was when Severus noticed her wedding band was gone.

"You're…You're ring…" He said out loud. He was in shock, only about 20 minutes ago she was crying her eyes out over him and now she had thrown the band away.

"I left it on the dining room table for him to discover, I don't think he knows yet." Lily sheepishly grinned.

"Truly amazing Lily. That's a rather big step for you, are you really alright with it?" Severus finally said.

"I'm not sure but you know what? I'm glad I did it." The truth was even how angry she was with James, she missed the ring, and she felt naked without it.

There was no turning back now, she left the ring but was still tempted to run back and put it back on. The ring had been a comfort for her, to remind her that someone loves her. But now, she had no one that loved her back. Her heart ached as gave a smile to Severus with a tear slowly going down her face. Severus looked her back in the eye and gently wiped her tears with his hands, it hurt seeing the one you loved in so much pain. He wondered how someone could even try to hurt an angel like her.

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a/n: Hope you enjoyed that chapter! Sorry for taking so long! **Read and Review** please!! See you next chapter!!


	12. Chapter 12: Bellatrix

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everybody, long time no update. Here I am FINALLY updating, can't believe it's chapter 12 already! Blah blah blah stuff people don't care about blah blah blah. Anyways, I would like to give a huge thank you to: **David Boreanaz's wife247**, **starsmile**, **Marauderhater**,** matrice**, **ujemaima**, **David Fishwick**, and **MJScream**. I don't know what I would do without you guys, thank you always for reviewing. Now I present you, with chapter 12.

I do not own HP blah blah blah.

Enjoy!

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James Potter paced around the room and angrily kicked a pile of paper. He probably shouldn't have done that, seeing that it was important paper work.

"_Motherfucker_!" He yelled angrily sending a spell towards an innocent trash bin. He couldn't believe it! The greasy git was sleeping with his, well _formally_ his woman. He always knew that the grease ball had feelings for Lily (it was pretty obvious, everyone except Lily knew.) He never saw him as a threat (who would?) Severus Snape was nothing but a joke. James angrily punched the wall, causing the frames on the wall to fall.

_Shit _James thought to himself. He really needed to calm down. He walked over to pick up one of the frames that had been dropped to the floor. The picture he had picked up was of Lily and James from a year ago.

"What the bloody hell happened?" He muttered as he sat into a nearby chair.

_The slut ran off with another man even before the divorce forms were filed _a thought crept in the corner of his mind. James let out a violent cry and smashed the picture into the floor, causing the frame to shatter into a million pieces. As he sat there with his face in his hands, his mind produced memories of the two of them when they were happy. It was worse that she was with Snape, yeah sure any other guy would still suck, but the fact that it was Severus fucking Snape made things worse. James took a deep breath, taming the angry monster within him. He looked at the room, it was a mess. He immediately regretted his temper tantrum.

"_Tersus_" He muttered as the mess cleared itself. James picked the picture from under the shattered glass and walked down the stairs with his eyes on the two of them. He was feeling very numb, in a way he knew why she had moved on. He gave no sign of ever taking her back. He felt empty, lonely and depressed.

By the time he had gotten to the living room, he heard a knock on the door. James quickly crumpled up the picture and threw it in the fireplace without a second thought.

"Jaaaammeessss!" A familiar voice called in a sing song voice.

When James opened the door, it revealed none other than Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew.

"You two should have just apparated into the house" James gave a weak smile. Ever since he and Lily split, the two had come to check on him every single day.

"Why, that would be impolite!" Sirius gave a boyish grin.

"Hullo James" Peter politely said.

"Hi Peter. Sirius, I've already said that I don't mind."

"We'll be sure to do that next time, thank you for the warm invitation." Sirius smiled as he waltzed into the house.

"You say that every day," James sighed. "Have a seat, I'll make us something to drink."

"No, you sit down." Sirius pushed James towards the dining room "My dog senses tell me you've had a long day. I'll figure things out." He winked, than took off before James could say otherwise. Sirius could see the exhaustion in his best friends face, something was wrong.

"I really should store dog treats for when you're good Sirius." James muttered.

"I heard that!" Sirius called out as Peter laughed loudly.

"How was your day?" Peter smiled as the two sat themselves down. Before James could give an answer, he spotted the key Lily had left on the table. James gave a deep sigh trying to keep his cool while Peter gave out a nervous squeak and shifted his eyes towards the kitchen hoping that Sirius would hurry up. James closed his eyes and took another deep breath.

_It's only a key_ he told himself as he continued to take deep breaths.

"uhm..James…I…"Peter's shaky voice interrupted James' breathing techniques. When James snapped his eyes open to see Peter holding up a small diamond ring, that was the end of it.

"FUCKING CUNT!" James angrily yelled tossing the key across the room. As Peter flinched, he dropped the ring and quickly scurried off to retrieve the key. James immediately grabbed the ring and held his hands. He squeezed the ring in his hands, almost leaving an imprint on his hand and rested his head on his arms.

When Sirius walked in with a pot full of coffee in his hands, he spotted the look for desperation on Peters face. When he turned to look at James, what he saw was a man that was broken.

"Oh shit" Sirius quickly said noticing the ring in James' hands.

"Lily came didn't she?" Sirius gently asked as he knelt beside James. After a few minutes of silence James finally answered.

"She came with that bloody git Snivellus"

"Excuse me?" Sirius was not quite sure if he heard right. James slowly raised his head and looked Sirius in the eye.

"She came with Snivellus." His voice shook as he clenched his fists.

"Oh James…" Sirius gave a sympathetic look.

"She was with bloody Severus Snape!" James angry voice echoed the house as he banged his fists against the table.

"Seriously…?" Peter nervously squeaked from the corner.

"With Snape?" Sirius asked wide eyed.

"She's slept with the greasy git." James growled through his teeth.

"Blimey…"Sirius legs gave in. "She said that?"

"Well…That's not _exactly_ what she said but she said they shared the bed…" James trailed off.

"That's the same thing!" Peter said. "What happened?" He asked as he pushed the key into his pocket, now would not be a good time to give the key back to James.

James let out a big heavy sigh.

"My boss let me home early so when I apparated home, I caught Snivellus sneaking around in my bedroom. I asked what he was doing in my house. The bloody coward than sent a spell my way, but I was able to throw him off. I told him to stay away, he then showed me his death mark, than Lily came in and hid behind him and she told me that they were together now. I finally sent a spell to Snape and the two apparated away in fear."

"The bloody git is _actually_ a death eater?" Sirius stared in shock.

"That means he could actually come after us and get revenge…"Peter scrunched up in fear.

"I know, but I'm sure I managed to scare him off for good. He always was a weak prick." James boasted. He was beginning to convince himself that his story was the _real _story.

"That's so brave of you" Peter said in awe.

"So Lily's gone…" Sirius' words sank down like a brick.

Before James was going to answer, reality started to sink in. Lily was gone, she was no longer his. He really wasn't going to ever hold her in his arms again. It felt like Lily was gone for thousands of years; he craved her and her touch.

"James?" Sirius quietly called but got no answer in return. James was off in his world.

"I've really lost her…" James croaked. Suddenly the comfortable position of 'the husband of Lily' was gone. There was no one to pick up the pieces.

***

Severus carefully carried the passed out Lily into his room; Lily's reaction after getting home was rather worrisome. She would fluctuate between losing interest in life and having a moment of absolute hatred for James. Severus didn't mind the second part, in fact he was absolutely _pleased _that Lily was finally opening her eyes and realizing that James Potter was in fact nothing but a low life prick. He was nothing but an overgrown child always whining how unfair life was or making himself sound heroic for small things.

After Lily had finished unpacking she raided Severus' rather large collection of alcohol. After downing a few drinks (few being the understatement of the year) she began swearing like a sailor and talking about what she hated of James. After a few moments, she began tearing up and crying how worthless her life was and now that she was alone and unworthy, no one would ever take her. After 3-4 cycles of that she finally passed out. Severus was rather relieved that she passed out because as awesome as he is talking about James Potter behind his back, comforting someone was definitely not his area of expertise. Severus was surprised that the headstrong woman he knew was so unstable and insecure. It made him wonder how long she had suffered, his heart ached for her.

When Severus laid her on his bed, he was tempted to change her into some pajamas but imagining how angry she would be if she noticed he undressed her, letting her stay as is was suddenly a much more brilliant idea. When he turned the light off, he prayed that he wouldn't do or say anything stupid in his sleep. As he laid in the dark he began to think over what had happened that day. Lily had said that the two of them had gone on a few _dates_, and shared that the bed together. It almost made it seem like they were lovers.

_You wish_ a voice in his head had said. Suddenly, he realized the reality of showing James Potter his death mark. His enemy now knew of his weakness, his enemy also happened to be a bloody Auror. What would Lily do if she found out that he was a Death Eater? What would Lily do if they took him off to Azkaban? He would lose her for sure, especially because Death Eaters weren't exactly known for being friendly muggle lovers.

"You idiot" Severus quietly told himself. He silently pondered what he was going to do about the Death Eater situation. He couldn't exactly hand in a two weeks' notice and disappear, but then again, Voldemort would ensure that you disappear; in fact he would _personally _do the honors of killing you off. Severus gave a shudder, turned to his side and looked straight at Lily, he couldn't leave her alone, and especially the state she was in now. A new year was going to start, which meant living arrangements would have to be made. Maybe he could stay on school grounds only during the night shifts and go home on the other nights. He would ask her to come but no, that would be impossible. That old fart would most definitely say no, or ask the poor woman about James.

Severus needed to sleep, he had a meeting with Bellatrix Lestrange tomorrow, and he needed the all the energy he could get. As Severus blankly stared at the ceiling he started thinking of what kind of conversation to strike up with Rudolphus, perhaps Quidditch? No, Severus could care less for it. It reminded him all too much of James Potter. He'll think of something later, he really needed to sleep.

***

When Lily woke up she was surprised to see Severus sleeping by her side. When her mind ran through what had happened yesterday her stomach gave a quick flip, it was over between her and James. Her plan to win him back had failed; instead she jumped in to save Severus. The look of shock on James face was almost worth it.

_It made him jealous!_ She thought in victory. But a part of her wondered if he looked like that because he still cared of it was because the man she was with was Severs of all people.

_Shut up Lily_ she told herself. _He doesn't love you anymore. He probably doesn't care anyways._

She groaned in pain as her head throbbed painfully. She did not feel well at all. Her stomach was not happy at all. She wanted to puke but at the same time she really didn't feel like puking the contents of her stomach.

_Oh please don't make me puke_ she silently prayed. She stared at Severus, his features were relaxed and his lips were slightly spread. It was those lips that touched her neck yesterday. Her body gave away goose bumps just by the memory, she wanted to relive yesterday minus that part with James.

_Those lips touched me…_Lily thought as she flushed. As she continued to stare at Severus she was tempted to kiss his cheek. Finally her stomach reminded her that she needed to get herself down to the bathroom faster than she could say 'Quidditch.' She placed her feet on the aged hardwood floor and ran to the bathroom as fast as she could. Thankfully she made it just in time. As she reacquainted herself with the toilet she thought about James. She really missed him but at the same time she hated him. After all those years of being together, how could he be so cruel? He called her a filthy whore! What was up with that? He was the one that snuck a peek when Mary was changing that one time, yes he was drunk but that still didn't excuse things.

Lily sat on the bathroom floor by the toilet (just in case.) The memories from last night played in her mind.

"Oh Merlin" Lily said aloud. She remembered how she told Severus that she wanted to die. She sunk her head into the toilet bowel and let the remainder of what was in her stomach out. When she got up and looked in the mirror, her eyes were swollen from the crying last night.

_Merlin's beard Lily…You treated him like a walking talking journal. _Lily thought to herself. She slowly tiptoed back into the bedroom hoping not to wake Severus up.

"Good morning Lily" A voice greeted her in the corner of the room. Lily gave a quick jump and turned to see Severus buttoning up his shirt.

"Oh Sev, you scared me." She let out a sigh of relief. "Are you going somewhere?"

"Yes I should be gone for most of the day. Preparations for the new school year, which is starting tomorrow, need to be done."

"Ah…"

"Before I leave, I'll brew you another drink to help with that nausea, it looks like we'll need something for that hangover of yours. "

"Thanks Sev" Lily gave a quick blush. "Maybe you can teach me? So I won't be a bother in the future."

"Really Lily, I don't mind."Severus said walking towards one of his cupboards. "I actually may have an extra somewhere in my cupboard."

When Severus stretched his hand into the cupboard he retrieved his last vial of the hangover potion. He was _always_ prepared.

"Thanks again Sev" Lily said than downed the drink. "Much better!" she said giving a quick smile.

"Not a problem. I do however; need to be on my way."

"Have a great day Sev" Lily smiled, she was a tad bit sad to see him go.

"Oh," Severus stopped and turned his heel. "Before I forget, we need to talk about something when I return."

"…Ok" Lily nervously replied. Severus gave a quick smirk than apparated. Lily took a big gulp; that did not sound good.

_Oh my god, he's going to tell he doesn't want to be around me anymore!_ She did leave quite the impression yesterday. Whatever it was, Lily went to get a drink, and she _needed_ one.

***

Severus walked into his class room to see that there was a large amount of material for potions. He quick smile danced on his lips and he paced to the table. He ran his hand against the fine wooden table that had somehow managed to support the weight for all his new materials. It was wonderful; this was one of the very few things that made it worth working at Hogwarts.

"Severus," a voice called. It was none other than Albus Dumbledore.

"Good afternoon Headmaster" Severus gave a small and quick bow.

"It really makes me happy to see you so involved in your work, Severus."

_I could be better with Defense Against the Dark Arts_ Severus quickly thought.

"However, it does concern me that you do not look as passionate during the staff meeting earlier. Perhaps you are still bitter about not obtaining the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts?"

"Albus, I would be equally, no, much more passionate about teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts. Give me a chance." Severus replied. Severus would be better than any teacher that Hogwarts ever had if he could just teach that freaking course. Since he was younger teachers often praised him for his advanced knowledge. He was a Death Eater for Merlin's sake! Hogwarts really could not find a better teacher. Severus was eager to have that position; Voldemort kept pushing him to get the job so they could recruit students by making them gain interest of the Dark Arts.

"Although I wouldn't doubt your skills of teaching, I do believe that your position for teaching Potions should be as equally satisfying. We already have a different professor at the moment." Albus smiled. Severus held his tongue from answering. It was _always_ the same answer; the old man had no intention of ever giving him that position.

"Yes Headmaster" Severus sighed there was just no way the old man would budge. Severus still intended to continue to apply whenever the opportunity would arise.

"Headmaster?" Severus quickly called as Dumbledore headed towards the door.

"Hm?" Dumbledore turned his head to look at him.

"I…"Severus clenched his fists. "I wish to have a guests stay with me in my chambers…I was seeking your permission." After a few moments of silence Dumbledore's face softened.

"A lady friend? I was wondering where you've been this past week. Whom, may I ask?" Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. "Bellatrix?"

Severus resisted the urge to vomit at the thought of Bellatrix. He realized that his answer needed to be well thought out, but didn't have a good enough answer.

"I wish to keep them anonymous" Severus finally said.

"I'm sorry Severus, but I must decline. Voldemort has been on the rise, I cannot take the risk, for not only the sake of the students but the staff as well. I hope you can understand."

"It's Lily," Severus desperately said. He needed to protect her no matter what the costs were. "Lily Evans, sir."

***

Severus' talk with Dumbledore went better than expected, too well for his liking.

_Flashback_

"_Miss Evans? Surely, you mean Mrs. Potter Severus." Dumbledore sighed. _

"_No sir, Potter finally released the poor girl from his iron clutch." Severus said dully. Dumbledore let out a laugh at Severus' comment. _

"_Sir, I'm worried about her. She hasn't been doing…well." Dumbledore stopped laughing and looked Severus. He let out a sigh and looked at Severus once more. _

"_You really are serious aren't you? I do trust Miss Evans; I'll find a way to explain to the staff. However, it would be best if the students don't find out. If you can promise me that Severus, I will allow Miss Evans to reside in the castle." _

"_Yes Headmaster, I truly appreciate it." _

_End of Flash back_

Severus glanced at the clock it was already 4:21, it was almost time to apparate to the Lestrange manor. Severus gave a quick sigh; he still hadn't thought of what to talk about with Rudolphus, Voldemort was good enough of a conversation. Severus quickly turned around to look at his collection of new items for the school year, smiled than apparated.

When Severus arrived at the Lestrange Manor, it was 4:25.

"Master has been expecting you" A small gray house-elf in tattered clothing greeted Severus and led him to the living room.

"Severus" Bellatrix purred.

"Good to see you Bellatrix" Severus said as he sat himself down on the leather couch.

"Call me Bella, I'm doing well. Edgar, get us a drink." She instructed the house-elf who quickly scurried off into the kitchen. "So Severus, a new school year starts tomorrow. You must be busy."

"Yes but that will not get in my way of serving the Dark Lord."

"Your loyalty is quite impressive" Bellatrix looked up and smirked. She slowly moved towards Severus. "I personally believe that we are the more loyal ones among the Death Eaters, and it's clear that the Dark Lord knows." She said as Edgar placed the drink in front of them on the table.

"Indeed" Severus said downing half the drink that was given to him. Becoming drunk was something that would probably make him hate the world less.

"Quite a drinker aren't you" Bellatrix smiled wickedly, she was more than impressed.

"Yes" Severus said before taking another gulp of his drink.

"I would like it if you could take a look at a very important artifact that I plan to give to Voldemort as a present. Come this way."

"Of course," Severus said as he followed Bellatrix to the bedroom. "Where is this artifact?" Suddenly Bellatrix gave a wicked smile and waved her wand to close the doors. She than pushed Severus down on the bed and straddled him.

"What is the meaning of this?" Severus sneered pushing her off him. She quickly sat beside him again.

"I want you Severus" She said as she stroked his jaw line.

"You see Severus," Bellatrix said as her kisses trailed along his neck. "I love men that are powerful and smart."

"Get off me!" Severus pushed her off yet again and immediately stood up. He grabbed his wand and pointed it towards her. Bellatrix gave a small frown and gave a whimper as Severus continued to glare at her.

"You wouldn't hurt me would you?" Bellatrix asked slyly. "I mean no harm." Severus gave sigh, he hated that she was right. If he hurt her, he would get hell from not only Rudolphus but from Voldemort as well. He continued to look down on her and slowly lowered his wand.

"_Expelliarmus!_" Bellatrix yelled sending Severus' wand flying across the room. Bellatrix practically slithered towards Severus; she trailed her thin fingers across his chest and gave a quick smirk. "Naughty little Severus, thinking he can get away from me. We're going to have to teach you a lesson for be so naughty." Bellatrix said licking her blood red lips.

"_Limito!_"She yelled. Severus was held prisoner with leather straps.

"Where's Rudolphus?" Severus spat in anger.

"Why he's left for work" Bellatrix said innocently as she got on top of him.

"I demand you untie me this moment" Severus yelled.

"Naughty boy, who said you, could talk?"She cackled as she strengthened the straps.

"Untie me, slut." Severus angrily said as he gritted his teeth.

"Oh yes talk dirty!" Bellatrix grinned as she licked her lips; she turned around to wave her wand to close the curtains. "Whatever should we do with you?" Her whisper tickled his ear. She slid her hands against his chest and started biting his neck. "Don't resist me Severus, you know you want it." She left a trail of red kiss marks down his chest and got on her knees; she attempted to unbutton his shirt but became impatient and ripped his shirt open. She licked circles around his chest, Severus was tempted to not moan in pleasure, what she was doing was feeling good. He was beginning to feel himself get hard; he tried his best to keep it down but wasn't doing so well.

"Bellatrix please stop" He begged.

"Keep begging, I love it when they beg." She said as she slowly kissed his inner thigh while massaging his package with one hand. When her mouth finally reached his package she gave a wet kiss over his pants. "We should take these off" She said giving a wicked grin. Severus tried struggled through the straps as Bellatrix slowly ripped his pants from the pant leg. She gave a quick tisk, as she licked his leg.

"_Accio wand!_"Severus called, his wand slid across the floor to his hand. As soon as he got his wand he apparated out as fast as he could. When Severus arrived home he came home to find a drunken Lily, a _very_ drunk Lily.

"Hello Sev!"She said as walked over to Severus.

"Hi Lily" Severus mumbled he was exhausted.

"Wow Sev! What happened?" Lily asked noting his ripped clothing.

"I ran into a crazy woman."He lied, Lily gave a giggle but didn't know whether or not he was kidding. Severus went to the kitchen cabinet to retrieve some whisky, when he opened the cabinet he was surprised to see the amount of alcohol missing.

"How much did you drink?!" Severus turned to Lily who was lying on the floor laughing.

"Just a tiny bit" Lily giggled, Severus was beginning to worry about the amount of alcohol she had consumed the entire day. It was almost 6; she probably hadn't eaten anything all day. Severus rubbed his temples and let out a sigh, he didn't mind that most of the alcohol was gone; he was just worried about the decline in her mental health.

"Come on Lily, I'm taking you to bed." He said holding her hand but she refused to move away from the living room floor. "Come on Lils" She shook her head.

"I don't want to go to bed yet." She pouted; Severus finally lifted her off the floor and took her to his bed. "No more drinking for a while, I'm keeping an eye on you Lils, I'm worried."

"I'm fine!" Lily giggled. "I'm harming no one!"

"You're harming yourself."

"I'm not doing anything stupid, come on Severus, please don't mother me." Lily pleaded.

"Let's just get you to bed." Severus said as he laid her on the bed. "Are there any pajamas I can get from your stuff that you can change into?"

"James and I sleep naked" Lily winked. For a moment, Severus ignored James being in there and imagined Lily's naked body in his bed. He nearly flushed at the thought of it. "After I change, I'll go get you something." He finally said. Just as he was leaving Lily, she grabbed his arm.

"Yes?"

"Sev, please don't leave me…" It was clear that what James had done to her caused her trauma. Severus sat down beside her on her bed and brushed her hair behind her hair.

"Lily, I swear on my life," he smiled "I won't ever leave you."

"That's what James said, he vowed to me." Lily stared at him looking as if she was on the verge of tears.

"Lily, I swear no matter what, I will always love and care for you, I promise you." Severus smiled, he was quite proud that he said that without stuttering, it didn't really seem like Lily took that as a confession that he loved her like a passion of a thousand flaming homosexuals, but she did seem to trust him and that, made Severus very happy.

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A/n: Whew, that turned out longer than I thought it would! Thanks for waiting! **Read and** **Review** please! See you next chappie!


	13. Chapter 13: Hogwarts

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone! I apologize for the slow updates these days; I'm having a bit of trouble thinking of the plot you see…But it promise it will not always be like this. I would like to thank **David Boreanaz's wife247**, **IonicAmalgam**,** matrice**,** brandon279**, and **starsmile** for their wonderful reviews. You guys inspire me to write faster and keep writing instead of giving up, thank you! As of **brandon279**'s question regarding Severus being a spy or not, he is currently not a spy. Thanks for reading so far!

**I will not be able to update till May 4th or 5th because I will be in Japan! **But I will be back with an awesome chapter, thank you!

For the millionth time, I do not own Harry Potter. Otherwise I would be rich, instead of a poor college student. Wouldn't that be awesome…-emo tear-

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As Severus turned the lights off and left the room he let out a heavy sigh. Just before he closed the door, he looked at her one last time and gave a quick smirk. Her sleeping face was so innocent; it was almost unbelievable that the two had gotten so close again, except this time they were both adults. There was a better chance that Severus could protect Lily (instead of it being the other way around.) But then again, who would he protect her from? In Severus' eyes it seemed almost impossible that anyone would want to even think of hurting this beautiful angel. Severus couldn't help but think how much of an idiot James was to let such a treasure go.

_His loss_ Severus bitterly thought to himself.

_You're nothing but a friend to her_ a heavy voice reminded him.

"Goodnight" Severus whispered as he closed the door. He needed to get ready for tomorrow, speaking of tomorrow…He was a bit nervous about tomorrow; would Lily accompany him to Hogwarts if he asked her to? What was that old man Dumbledore going to tell the other staff? Severus felt a sudden shudder of fear; he was now in debt to that man. But it was for Lily, that didn't matter; he would do _anything_ for Lily, he would even risk his life for her.

Severus sat down and took another deep breath, what was he going to do about Bellatrix, that girl was nothing but trouble. What was the 'artifact' that she wanted to show him before she viciously pounced him?

_Most likely her vag!_ A voice laughed in his head. _But she said that it was a gift for the Dark Lord; could she have been possessed by something? _In reality, Severus could never believe why a woman (especially a pure-blood or a woman who had another man) would seriously want him. _Like I said, _a wicked voice laughed in his mind. _Probably her Eskimo Pie!_

Severus shoved the voice deeper in to the back of his head. He needed to think, the bitch was probably going to run and tell Rudolphus and the Dark Lord and claim that _he_ tried to have his way with_ her_. Just the thought of that made him absolutely nauseous.

But then again, would the Dark Lord even care?

_Of course he would you idiot! _A voice similar to his mother screeched in his head. _You know that the Dark Lord has a bit of a soft spot for the cunt!_

Severus hoped for a minute that if it was only Lily who had pounced on him instead. Before his mind wandered off Severus quickly tried to stop himself. A quick image of a "Dark" Lily popped up; she was wearing a long black dress with a generous amount of cleavage. On top of the dress she had a dark velvet corset on and she would say _"Severus, you've been a naughty boy haven't you?"_ She looked damn good no matter what.

_Stop you retched pig. Think more rationally._ Severus quickly reminded himself while wiping off a bit of drool. He rested his forehead on his own hand he needed to think of a way to persuade Lily to come to Hogwarts with him. The more he thought of ways of asking her, the cheesier the dialog had gotten:

"_Oh my lovely Lily, come with me! Come run far away to Hogwarts with me and we shall be forever happy!"_

"_Oh my darling Prince, of course! I'll go anywhere with you!"_

_-The two embrace- _

_-Fin-_

In all reality it probably was going to be like this:

"_Lily?I was…er…wondering…if…er…you…um wanted to come to Hogwarts with me?" _

_-Fin-_

He felt like he was 15 all over again, like he was asking her to come along to Hogsmead with him. There could be a small chance that she would agree, a man could only dream right?

Severus grunted angrily this was not a joke he really needed to think of ways to ask her. Suddenly it felt like he was almost _proposing _to her.

_You wish! _A negative thought laughed.

Maybe thinking about it was not a good idea right now. He hadn't even thought of what he was going to teach on the first day of class.

_I'll think about it tomorrow_ Severus though. He really didn't care; it wasn't like the first years would know that he wasn't prepared for the first class (than again, it was always the same speech every year: I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even put a stopper to death…and so on) The other years would be either too ignorant or too afraid to mention that Severus Snape was unprepared. In the end Severus decided it was a good idea to sleep early, after all he had a long day ahead of him.

*

Severus had awaked that morning to the piercing sound of his alarm clock and a frown on his face. 9 AM, he instantly regretted setting the alarm that early. He looked up at the familiar ceiling; he was going to start teaching dunderheads again for the next few months. Severus got up and groaned; his back ached from sleeping on the hard wood floor. As he stretched, he looked on the bed to notice that Lily was missing. A sharp pang of panic and terror hit, and his heart started viciously racing, Lily was gone. Had he lost her again? He possibly couldn't lose her all over again; he slammed the bedroom door and started frantically looking for her.

"Lily?" Severus' weak voice echoed the house. He glided over to the living room in hopes to find her but there was no such luck.

"Lily?" He said except a bit louder. It felt like someone was closing the door of happiness for his life. Severus angrily cursed his luck, why hadn't he seen this coming? Of course life wouldn't allow him to live the luxurious life of being happy.

"Merlin please…" Severus muttered with a hint of desperation in his voice as his black eyes darted around the room. Suddenly, like an answer to his prayers he smelt a faint sweet fragrance coming from the kitchen. In an instant he rushed up the stairs to the kitchen, when he arrived he was pleased to see Lily was not gone.

"Lily!" He gasped, however Lily did not turn around to acknowledge him. It was like he didn't exist. His heart clenched, he knew this feeling before. It was like he was being sucked into his childhood, when Tobias didn't even bother acknowledging his own son.

"Lily?" his voice pleaded to her back. Like a frightened child he slowly crept towards her and gently put his hand on her back and called her name again. Lily gave a quick jump and a small yelp of shock.

"Oh Sev you scared me!" She said as she gently removed her headphones.

"You were listening to music?" Severus raised an eyebrow.

"What's with that look? I've worked hard to cook us some breakfast!" Lily pouted. Severus let out a sigh of relief. She wasn't angry, she wasn't gone, and everything was okay.

"There's something important we need to discuss." Severus said. Lily gave a questioning look and followed Severus to the dining room. Severus' heart started beating faster and faster his chest felt like it was going to burst. It was now or never, he needed to ask her whether he really wanted to hear the answer or not.

When Severus and Lily reached the dining room, he had seen how beautifully the table was set. It was clear that Lily had worked hard since the morning to prep everything. As he sat down he saw the smile on Lily's face, and it dawned on him that it could be the last genuine smile he would see from her.

Severus went to open his mouth to begin but it felt like his mind went blank. What would he say? He wished that he thought things out more thoroughly.

Lily took a bite of the food she had prepared and looked up at Severus; she questioningly cocked her head and smile.

"Is something wrong Severus?" Lily finally asked. Severus quickly glanced up at Lily's beautifully green laden eyes. As soon as their eyes met he shifted his gaze away from her. Severus gave a loud gulp accompanied by a visibly bobbing Adam's apple.

"I'm going to be leaving for Hogwarts today," Severus began as he closely examined her face for any sign of interest. Severus Snape was taking a quite large risk by asking her to come and he knew it. "I would like it if you'd come with me."

"Hogwarts?" Lily's eyes shot open.

"Yes, we would leave tonight…" Severus said as he was desperately trying to conceal his fear of rejection.

"Oh…" Lily quietly said. Severus' stomach gave a quick clench just by the sound of her soft voice.

"You're more than welcome to stay here…"

"…That's alright Severus." Lily's firm voice sunk heavily into the pit of his stomach. This was the end. He immediately regretted asking.

"Understood" Severus croaked weakly. If only he had kept his mouth shut, if he said that he would be leaving today and would visit as often as he could. That way, he still could have been with her.

"I guess I'll have to start packing" Lily quietly said. Severus' heart was aching; he tried to speak but if felt like something was stuck in his throat. He continued to hang his head low and fought everything he had in him from showing the disappointment on his face. He heard Lily get up from her seat, Severus' heart screamed in pain, in his mind he was begging her not to go.

"Is Proffesor Dumbledore aware that I'm going to be there?" Lily's gentle voice broke the silence.

"What?" Severus said instantly jerking his head up.

"You aren't sneaking me in or anything are you?" Lily eyed him suspiciously.

"Of course not. Does that mean you are coming?" Severus found it difficult to conceal the happiness in his voice.

"If that's alright" Lily smiled. "Do I have much time to pack?"

"Not really" He replied honestly. He was extremely pleased; the world suddenly seemed like a much better place. "We can always come back during the weekend to pick up the rest of your stuff" he added.

"Give me half an hour" Lily grinned and ran off to her room. Severus' thin lips curled into a smirk. He decided that he would see to it that all his belongings were properly packed. He quickly turned on his heel and swept out of the room.

In a way she was a bit nervous but excited to see Dumbledore again. He was always kind to both her and James. _James_ the name made her feel like someone punched her in the stomach. Lily wondered what Severus had said to Dumbledore in order to persuade him into let her staying within the castle wall. But it was most definitely going to be pleasant to see her old professors. Lily searched through the pile of stuff that she had only unpacked a few days ago. Lily smiled to herself, she was happy that Severus ad asked her to come with him. Secretly, she was dreading Severus' departure, which meant her being all by herself. She wasn't too sure she was ready to be on her own yet, and having Severus' company was absolutely wonderful. However, asking Severus to stay was completely out of the question. It wasn't like he was going to put his entire life on hold until she felt better. It wasn't like he was her husband of anything; he didn't have the responsibility of taking care of her.

_Husband?_ Lily caught herself thinking. He wasn't even her boyfriend.

_Way to skip the stages Lily_ a thought viciously echoed in her mind. Lily continued to stuff items that she deemed as things that she needed in a small suitcase. As she was packing the memory of Severus' kisses trailing down her neck arose. Lily gave a quick blush; she could almost still feel his warm soft lips on her neck. Her body began to feel very hot.

"_Lily"_ his low and dangerous voice echoed in her head. Suddenly as a reminder to snap back into reality, the picture of the mysterious brunette and Severus embracing fell out from one of her pant pockets.

"Blimey!" Lily thought out loud, she still hadn't returned the picture to the original place. Lily tucked the picture carefully into her pocket, carefully enough so she wouldn't add a crease to the fine photo. Her eyes scanned through the bookshelf she was sure she took the book from. However, no matter how many times she examined the shelves, she had no such luck. Lily quickly scurried off to the living room, if it wasn't in the bedroom it was most likely there. Lily hoped that Severus wasn't in the living room.

_Knowing my luck he probably is there_ she thought to herself. To her relief he wasn't, now all she had to do was find the actual book. Lily read each book aloud in a loud whisper so she wouldn't miss the book she was frantically searching for. _Where is it?! _Lily desperately thought, feeling somewhat stressed. She would just yell _Accio Book_ but that probably would not end well considering the amount of books here would make a muggle library look pitiful in comparison.

"Are you ready?" Severus' silky voice crept up on her by surprise.

"Yes!" Lily nervously squealed. "I'm just…looking for a book."

"You wouldn't have happened to see the book _Potions: A recipe_?" She smiled. "I just loved the book so much I wanted to read more of it!"

"Ah, not to worry," Severus' black eyes glittered. "That book is one of my personal favorites; I've packed it with me."

"Excellent!" Lily forced a smile. She was _fucked_, royally fucked. "Well, I just need to zip up my bag and I'll be ready to go!" Lily laughed nervously. Severus raised an eyebrow at her odd laugh and started walking away. He paused and turned right at her.

"Come to my room when you're finished. The portkey is there."

"Portkey?"

"Yes, teachers have the choice between Portkey and the train." Severus' continued, "I personally find the train an utter waste of time." He then straightened his back and proceeded to walk back into his room. Lily grinned happily as she returned her room and shoved the picture before quickly zipping up her trunk. She felt like she had discovered a Hogwarts secret; in a way she could understand why students did not have the option of Portkey. It definitely gave an answer why she would never see certain teachers on the Hogwarts Express, another mystery solved!

When Lily walked into Severus' room with her suitcase behind her she laid her eyes on Severus who was straightening out the cuffs on his shirt. He then turned around to notice Lily was there and ready.

"Lily," Severus said in his usual tone. "Shall we go?" Lily gave an excited nod; she was looking forward to see exactly what form the portkey had taken.

"It should be activated in about 30 seconds; you'll want to hold on now." Severus said holding up a dusty old book. Lily nodded silently and reluctantly held onto the other side of the book, she immediately prepared herself for the two of them to go spinning but nothing happened. Than Lily stared at the Portkey in excitement but after about 20 seconds of waiting the remaining 10 seconds felt like it was a decade. She carefully examined Severus' hands; it reminded her how a lot had changed. His hands had gotten a bit larger than before, and they were no longer hands of a boy but now of a young man. Suddenly the two started spinning uncontrollably fast, than there was a blue flash of light. Next thing Lily knew she was in an unrecognizable room. Lily's eyes study her new surroundings; the wall was made of silvery grey stones and the beautifully aged oak flooring. There were 4 doors around her; the room had a unique fragrance that lingered. From what she could recognize, she could smell the faint fragrance of pine.

"Where are we?" she gasped as her eyes wandered around the room.

"My chambers" Severus muttered as he dusted himself. "Come this way."

Lily followed Severus as he led her to the door on the right. When he opened the door he revealed a large room with black painted walls with velvet green curtains over the windows. Across from the door was a walnut colored wooden wardrobe. At the other end the room there was a king sized bed, with dark forest green covers and black silk sheets.

"This will be your room, use it however as you wish."

"But where will you be sleeping?"

"I'll be sleeping in the study room, follow me." Severus said in his low voice. "I'll give you a tour." Lily left her bags and followed closely behind Severus and received the grand tour of the place.

The place consisted of 4 rooms, and 1.5 bathrooms. Every room except the bedroom had a smoky silver stone wall, the floor in every room except the bathing room was a beautiful almond colored wooden flooring. The bathing room was Lily's favorite room overall. The flooring was beautiful emerald marble flooring, it had the same starry ceiling as the Great Hall, and sage green color water was flowing out of the mouths of the two large stone serpents. Lily knew that she was going be using this room often.

The living room was behind two large doors, on the left side wall there was a see through fireplace installed, therefore one could look right through the wall and peek into the study room. At the end of the room there sat a well fitted counter with two single shelves on each side (which had mirror backings) and right in the middle of the shelves was a large window covered by the dark velvet curtains that were in every room. In front of the fire place there laid a large Persian carpet with a long black leather sofa near it. Also at the end there was another door which was where the toilet was located.

The study room, the walls were covered with bookshelves and counter space. Above the counters there were cupboards that were most likely filled with various ingredients. At the end of the room there was another couch, except this was a dark green sofa-bed with wooden railings. Lily immediately knew that was where Severus would be sleeping because the house-elves had left neatly folded bedding on the side.

"It's beautiful Sev." Lily gasped in amazement. She had clearly underestimated the living space that teachers received. Suddenly there appeared to be someone in the corner of the room, the two turned around to see none other than Albus Dumbledore. Severus gave a great heavy sigh as Lily let out a gasp and immediately walked over to greet him.

"Miss Evans, it's a pleasure to see you!" Dumbledore gave a welcoming smile.

"It's really great to see you" Lily gave a polite smile. There was not a difference from before during their school days except that both the hair on his head and beard was longer, but that was about it. "Thank you for allowing me to stay in Hogwarts, I truly appreciated from the bottom of my heart. If there is anything I could do please let me know."

"I'm always happy to have such a pleasant guest over" After a pause Dumbledore continued. "I was wondering if I could talk to you privately Miss Evans." Dumbledore's eyes twinkled over his moon glasses. Severus gave a quick sneer hoping that the old man would not say anything insensitive to Lily. "Severus, I will be sure to let her know of the password of this room. I'll see you at the staff meeting in approximately 30 minutes."

"Of course" Severus replied rather coldly. He watched as the two walked away, after the two were out of sight he walked back into the living room and gave a big sigh. He proceeded to walk to the study room, when he arrived he closed the curtains right away. People would probably comment on how that most likely did not help him, when it came to his pale skin. But for their information, having pale skin can be considered a good thing in some cultures.

He opened the cabinets to see what potions had remained from when he was last in the room. When he was last in the room (other than showing Lily the room) he would have only dreamed to have Lily in here with him. If someone had told him that Lily would be right here with him, he probably would have gone after them with a curse for saying such an impossible thing. He began thinking how much had changed over the past little while, it was like a miracle. He was beginning to appreciate James Potter's stupidity; if it weren't for that he most likely continue to receive Lily's hatred instead of her friendship. If it weren't for James Potter's stupidity, he wouldn't have even been able to run his hands over her body (even though it was only that one time.) He gave a quick smirk; he would have loved to see the look on the toerag's face if he sent an appreciation owl to him. When Severus had glanced at the clock, it was now ten minutes before the meeting. He trusted Dumbledore to let Lily know of the password for the door, if he left now he would get there just in time, with maybe a minute or two to spare.

When Severus had arrived, to his surprise Lily was there in the meeting room. She was talking to some of the teachers and how pleased she was to see them again. He figured that Dumbledore was going to make up a poor excuse to the teachers to why Lily was in Hogwarts. He sat down in his usual place which was unfortunately farther away from where Lily was sitting, who was sitting right next to Dumbledore. It was an interesting view because if one would just walk by it would look almost like Lily was one of the staff or possibly someone from the ministry attending the meeting. Severus gave a shudder at the thought of the ministry coming near him. As Dumbledore's usual old speech went on about how he was expecting this year to be a good year for the teachers Severus' mind had wandered off. He remembered that Lucius had mentioned getting into the ministry, but Severus was trying to think exactly how Lucius was planning to get into the ministry. It was nearly impossible for someone to break into the ministry; there was a possibility that Lucius had someone from the inside that was going to help him. Either way, Severus couldn't understand why Lucius was so confidant.

"…and I would like to introduce our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher to everyone." Dumbledore continued. This caught Severus' attention; he wanted to look at the wretched bastard who had taken Severus' dream job away from him. He was a bit worried that Quirrell was going to get the job, he had been doing the rats work and there was a slight chance he was going to get the damn job. Nonetheless, Severus would definitely give the new teacher something to fear.

"Miss Evans, has kindly accepted the job offer of become our new teacher." Dumbledore gave a direct smile to Severus whose eye shot open.

"What?!" Severus said aloud causing everyone in the room to look at him as his eyes glittered dangerously.

"Is there a problem Severus?" Dumbledore's gentle voice asked.

"...Not at all," Severus said in his most confidence voice. "I'm quite pleased."

"That's good." Dumbledore smiled and continued on about what else was new this year (which Severus could care less about.)

Severus didn't know how to feel, he felt threatened about his dream job being given to someone else but at the same time it was Lily…Severus clenched his teeth angrily, the old fart had told him that someone else had gotten the job. The wretched man lied to him!

"Well, I hope everyone has a pleasant year," Dumbledore said as he stood up. "I will see you all at the great hall in approximately 6 hours. Please go to your stations at least 30 minutes before the students arrive, which will be as usual at 4:45"

Everyone stood up, some stayed behind to talk with each other about the upcoming year. As he was walking away at a high speed Lily caught up with him.

"That was a big surprise wasn't it Sev?" Lily said slightly panting.

"Indeed" Severus replied. "Was that what the two of you were discussing?"

"Yeah, he said that I always was exceedingly well at everything…" Lily said shyly. "And since there was a shortage of a Defense Against Dark Arts teacher, he thought that I would be able to do well."

_A shortage?! _Severus angrily thought. _I was practically begging for the job and he told me there already was a teacher when there wasn't?_ Severus was fighting the urge of walking back and giving Dumbledore a piece of his mind Death Eater style.

"Dumbledore mentioned that you are very talented at the subject as well. Would you be able to give me a bit of a brush up lesson tonight so I can be prepared for tomorrow morning?" Severus a smile curled on his thin mouth

"I'd love to." Severus smiled a bit too enthusiastically, this was his chance to prove how well of a teacher he was to Dumbledore. He would teach Lily and Dumbledore would realize that Severus would have made an amazing teacher at Defense Against the Dark Arts. However, looking at how happy Lily looked Severus couldn't bear taking the job away from her. In fact, this would mean she would be around himmore.

Severus sighed to himself. He would teach her well enough to make Dumbledore realize exactly how much of an asset he was to the school but not enough to have Lily replaced by him.

"I'm happy though," Lily smiled. "Apparently there is also a shortage of space to stay so I'll be able to stay with you." Severus gave another smirk again, his urge to kill Dumbledore decreased. The old fart knew how to do a thing or two.

"I am also quite pleased you are able to stay with me too." Severus added. He was indeed pleased, _very_ pleased.

When the students had arrived, everything had gone over orderly like every year. The students arrived, Hagrid greeted them they got on either a boat of a carriage and made their way to the Great Hall as soon as they dropped off their stuff in the houses as the first years got the speech from McGonagall. The entire time Severus gave anyone who even dared to make eye contact a sneer. However when it came to a first year being sorted into Slytherin, he give them a smirk and a clap exceptionally louder. He was in his unusual foul mood until Dumbledore gave his introduction of Lily to the entire school. He happened to overhear a few students talking.

"Our new DA teacher is quite a babe." A male student said loudly. Severus immediately gave him a terrifying glare that would even scare Voldemort himself. The students jumped and kept quiet during the rest of the meal. Severus meanwhile, massaged his temples.

This year was going to be a long one, _very_ long.

* * *

A/N: Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please **R&R** and again **I will be unable to update till May 4 or 5th.** Thank you and I look forward to seeing the reviews hee hee!


	14. Chapter 14: Discrimination

One Night with Severus Snape

Hello everyone, I guess I lied. I'm able to update before May 4th/5th. I was planning to update than but since I am able to temporarily access a computer I will update today. However the chapter is short so I apologize beforehand. The next chapter I will update will most likely be between May 8th – May 11th. I would like to give my usual shout out/thanks to **IonicAmalgam**, **David Boreanaz's wife247**, **matrice**, **starsmile**, and **David Fishwick**. I know I've said this a million times but if it weren't for you guys I probably wouldn't update as much or even update at all. I appreciate all the reviews each and every one of you has given me, thank you! Japan has been pretty awesome, got to see family and friends (useless info about the author: half Japanese!) When I talked to my boyfriend over the phone the other day, he said something very James Potter like, I nearly beat him to a pulp (over the phone of course.) He said something rather cruel about a friend and I asked why he was so mean to him, and he replied 'it's more because he exists.' I immediately thought of what James Potter the pompous douche says about poor Severus…Now that I think about it…My boyfriend kind of looks like James Potter…NOOOO!!!! (Fun fact: in high school people said he looked like Harry Potter)

Anyways, enough rambling from me here's the new chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

It was mid-September and the rain was coming down harder than ever. The entire sky was filled with dark clouds; the sun was no where to be found. However, there was a much darker cloud cast over a tall rugged handsome man. His usual dark messy hair was matted down for once, but only because it was drenched with rain water. Everyone around had an umbrella but this man didn't even bother. Little droplets of water trickled down from his forehead down to his scruffy chin. As the man was rapidly walking his boot viciously hit a puddle which caused water to splash and made his pant leg wetter (if becoming wetter was even possible at this point.) The man continued to walk rapidly in the rain, it was clear that he was in a hurry to get to his destination. As he was nearing his destination, he walked through a dark empty forest, his foot would sink deeply into the wet mud but even that didn't stop him. He finally arrived at a small pub which looked like a shabby little shack. The man walked into the pub in an arrogant matter. As soon as he entered his eyes examined the inside of the pub; finally he spotted his best friend, Sirius Black.

"You're drenched!" Sirius loudly exclaimed even before greeting him.

"Nice to see you too" James sarcastically said and walked over to his friend, leaving mud foot prints on the wooden floor behind him.

"Excuse me," Sirius smiled at the bartender. "You wouldn't happen to have a towel or something my dear friend could use?"

"Do I look like a towel shop?" The bartender bitterly replied. "I sell alcohol not towels." He scowled before walking off.

"Geez…" Sirius muttered. "Pull down your skirt I can see your vagina from here." James let out a laugh and proceeded to sit down but Sirius stopped him.

"Come on Prongs," said Sirius pulling James towards the exit. "Let's get you to my house."

"But I just got here!" James protested. "At least let me have a drink!"

"You can drink all you want back at my house." Sirius sighed.

"But I can drink here too." James said. He was being difficult and he knew it. "Besides, there's nothing wrong with this place."

"Yes, but I didn't think you'd be this wet." Sirius said as he squeezed water from the back of James shirt.

"It isn't my fault that England's skies match the color of the bloody concrete all year round!" James exclaimed as he followed Sirius out the door.

"Well there are _some_ good days…" Sirius muttered as he continued to lead James through the forest.

"Why didn't we just apparate from the pub instead of walking to bum fuck Egypt?" James whined from behind.

"Because that was a _muggle_ pub FILLED with _muggles_. Merlin Prongs, you've really become quite reckless.'' Sirius sighed. "We're here, you apparate first."

Suddenly two loud cracks echoed the dark forest as the two apparated to the Black Manor.

"Besides," James continued as he immediately helped himself to the kitchen where all the alcohol was stored. "Why should I care?"

"Because," Sirius answered as he followed closely behind. "You're an Auror, you _should_ care!"

"I _should_ but that doesn't mean I do genuinely care." James said cracking open a beer. "I mean, what's the worst that could happen?" James said with no fear in his voice than continued to down his drink. "We get suspended from school? Oh no! Whatever shall we do?!" James yelled sarcastically followed by a loud laugh.

"No, but do you feel like receiving a howler from the ministry?" Sirius said sternly before taking a sip from his drink as well.

"No I do not mother dearest." James rolled his eyes and continued to finish his drink.

"You'll get suspended from work. I, on the other hand, have nothing to lose!" Sirius boasted as he threw some dry clothes at James.

"Being out of work isn't exactly something to be proud of." James laughed as he changed into Sirius' clothes. "Ah, much better."

"Who cares? Even though I was disowned as a Black, my poor old senile mumsy left me a nice fortune and this house. I have nothing to fear!" Sirius exclaimed as he propped himself on a chair.

"Who is the reckless one now?" James laughed.

"It must be from all the good deeds I've done through out my entire life!" Sirius exclaimed.

"Oh yes, here comes Snivellus, the King of the dark angels to give you your reward for being ever so kind!"

"Lovely!" Sirius laughed. "Is it a bucket full of grease?"

"Ha!" James laughed but than turned to Sirius and looked at him very seriously. "You know, he may actually get revenge on us one of these days."

"Like I said," Sirius grinned widely. "I have nothing to fear."

"Cheers!" James gave a hearty laugh as they both took a generous sip of their drinks. "He's too much of a coward to do anything." The two than proceeded to drink merrily and have fun at the expense of Severus Snape. 20 minutes later the two continued to insult Severus.

"He's probably too busy sticking his abnormally large nose in a book!" Sirius laughed.

"I bet there's grease marks left on each page from his nose touching the book." James added.

"Ha! Or too busy trying to pursue Lily!" Suddenly the room fell silent. Sirius realized the mistake he hand made, the subject of Lily was a big no-no.

"I…I…I'm sorry, I just….I…" Sirius nervously spoke feeling guilty for what he had done. James finally gave a smirk and looked straight at his friend.

"No need to apologize, Padfoot." James grinned darkly. "…Speaking of the bitch…"

Sirius felt oddly uncomfortable of Lily being called a bitch. However he could understand the resentment James held for her running off with someone as low as Severus Snape.

"I know it's been quite difficult, especially with the appearance of the git," Sirius began. "How are you holding up?"

"Fan-fucking-tastic. She slept with the bloody git, I absolutely _need_ to get revenge on her. It's all I can think about, the ways I can get her back for the humiliation she's caused me."

"Perhaps sleep with her sister?"

"Have you _seen_ the wretched woman-thing?" James nearly gagged.

"I kid, I kid!" Sirius gave a weak smile. "So how was work?" Sirius attempted to change the subject.

"Enchanting!" James replied sarcastically. The truth was, his reckless behaviour and rugged appearance was making women swoon over him more. He over heard his female coworkers labeling him as 'dangerously sexy.' However, those women didn't matter he had one woman in mind and he couldn't stop thinking about her. "I can't stop thinking about her…" James sighed.

"Oh Prongs…" Sirius said sympathetically. His friend was hurting quite a bit more than he expected.

"All I can think about is what the ultimate revenge would be." James laughed loudly as Sirius frowned. Sirius would than again, proceed to change the subject away from Lily, but James would keep going back on the various ways he could get revenge on the fiery red head. This cycle continued about 3 to 4 times until he came up with the perfect plan.

"I've got it!" James finally exclaimed.

"Oh?" Sirius nervously asked. He was beginning to worry about what his friend had in mind.

"I'm going to get her to sleep with me." James grinned. Sirius thought in his head how sad it was that his best friend missed his woman so much that he was trying to get back with her through sleeping with her.

"How good is that?" James gave a wicked smile. "Getting a one night stand out of the self righteous bitch?"

"Er…" Sirius wished that his friend was kidding but it was pretty obvious that he was dead serious. He didn't know what to say.

"It would cause grief on both her and the greasy git. It'll be two birds, one stone."

...

It was another rainy day at Hogwarts, but that didn't matter since it was a school day for the children, the suckers were confined within the castle walls. The past few weeks had been quite hectic for Severus Snape. He had taken a 'few' points away from many of the houses (mainly Gryffindor of course) because the male students continued to refer their new DADA teacher as 'hot' or state the fact that they wanted to sleep with her. Slytherin's on the other hand, absolutely despised her with a passion. As Severus continued to patrol the school corridors, he came across two 6th year Gryffindor's talking about Lily again.

"I couldn't stop staring at Professor Evans tits the entire class, she is such a babe!" One Gryffindor said to the other.

"What I'd give to put my cock in between those luscious tits of hers." The other said licking his lips.

"Woah man! TMI! Keep that to yourself!" The first Gryffindor laughed.

"Indeed." said a dark figure that slowly crept out of the corner, it was none other than Professor Snape. "50 points from Gryffindor" He smirked. "For being disrespectful to your teachers."

"Shit! It's Snape!" One of them muttered as they both scampered off. Severus massaged his temples; apparently taking points away was not enough. In fact the other day a similar incident happened except before he could step in, a group of Slytherin boys stepped in.

"Have you seen the new DADA teacher?" A tall blond Gryffindor boy whispered loudly to the other three. All of them loudly agreed and began describing Lily's body explicitly as they strolled along the castle corridors. Just when Severus was about to step in and take the usual 50 points away, a group of Slytherin boys came in.

"How likely of stupid Gryffindor's, to have bad taste in women" one of the 7th years said as Severus' eye twitched.

_Bad taste?_ Severus thought angrily. Having the hots for Lily was one thing he and the Gryffindor students had in common.

"What's that?" One of the boys from Gryffindor growled. "Interesting. How, clever and cunning can you be when your symbol is a virtually blind animal that has to resort to getting vague details of rodents through its nostrils in order to survive?" A few of the Slytherin's began hissing angrily towards the boys from the other house. It was the only time Severus was cheering on Gryffindor for once.

"Only you idiots would find a filthy mudblood like her attractive." One of the 7th years smirked, who appeared to be the leader of the group.

"Why you-" All 4 Gryffindor's yelled and began to raise their fists like angry male peacocks flashing their feathers as a warning to another.

"Silence" Severus' cold voice dripped over the students. "20 points from Gryffindor, for starting this ruckus" the Slytherin boys smirked as the boys from Gryffindor angrily protested.

"And," Severus cringed. "50 points from Slytherin. Such discrimination is not tolerated towards those who are muggle born." Than he quickly turned his heel and walked away from the group of unhappy children.

Severus continued to patrol the castle walls as he pondered what subject he would tutor Lily today regarding DADA. She was a fast learner and it was quite easy to teach her, in fact he found it rather enjoyable because in a way he was teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts. He neatly scribbled notes on each pages for Lily just in case she wanted to know something. Occasionally Lily would sadly wonder whether she was good enough for the post or not because the Slytherin students would continue to look down on her just for the pure fact she was a muggle born witch. For once in his life Severus felt sympathetic towards someone, he knew that she still felt pain from what Potter had done, he knew she missed him and still loved him (despite her denying it) and how the students would be disrespectful of her. However he respected her for keeping her head up and staying proud regardless what the students said.

Deep down Severus wished that Lily would walk by and hear how he lectured his own house for calling her a mudblood. Because that way, she would truly be able to understand how much he truly regretted calling her a mudblood.

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A/N: sorry for the weird ending, it's all I had time for. R&R please! See you all next chapter!


	15. Chapter 15: Dear Lily

So I lied again when I said May 11th, I guess its May 13th. I'm sorry I was having a bit of a slump trying to decide what was going to happen next; this chapter is **not** the last chapter. I would like to give my usual shout out to: **David boreanaz's wife247**, **MoveBitch**,**starsmile****, ****matrice** and **David Fishwick**. Thank you all for your lovely reviews I appreciate them all! I can't say thank you enough times! I'm sorry this chapter is short; I do have more things to come. I am no longer on my rut…buwahaha!

Well, as I say usually: Enjoy!

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Lily gave a deep sigh as she put an old rusty book with a fragile red book cover back on the old shelf.

"I can see why you're in the Restricted Section" she muttered. Lily had gone to the Library to learn more information that she could teach for her class. She was amazed by all the knowledge Severus had about such dark things, he taught her better than any other teacher had taught her over the years. However, being the strong independent woman that she is, she wanted to find out some things herself. Lately Severus had looked absolutely exhausted, his face being paler than ever. She knew on some nights he would be out somewhere, most likely doing a mission for Dumbledore, and he would come back just minutes before the sun would rise. So in order to ease his stress she came to the Library, she figured for Defense Against the Dark Arts, the Restricted Section would definitely be somewhere she could go to find information on Dark Arts that have changed history and cause fear among wizards in the past. What she found was absolutely terrifying, after one book she could take it no more. The book had shown people suffering from spells, the screams the people gave were echoing in her mind. She briefly glanced at what happens to the victims of the Cruciatus Curse, but quickly shut her eyes before abruptly closing the book before she could see any more of the nasty contents.

"_Lumos_" She whispered as she grabbed the other books that she had found in the innocent part of the school Library, clenching them as tightly as she could as she rushed through the dark castle walls as fast as she could. Dumbledore was kind enough to exclude her from patrolling duties for the first few months; however, after she saw the contents of the book earlier, she wasn't exactly looking forward to facing the dark by herself in the huge castle of Hogwarts. Lily hated walking through the dark corridor at night; there was nothing but the deadly silence. Every time she saw a shadow move she would grip her wand tighter, trying to remember all the deadly spells Severus taught her. In the end it would be one of the castle ghosts wandering around aimlessly, which still didn't put her mind at ease.

As Lily slowly opened the heavy door of Severus' chambers she quickly crept into her room, which was dimly lit by a few candles. She wasn't sure if Severus was back yet, as tempted as she was to go peak through the see through fireplace, she was too afraid of the dark. Looking through the glass of the fireplace, she might make eye contact with one of the green slimy things in the jars he had in that room. She could not understand how someone could sleep peacefully with a room full of dead mysterious things, but it seemed like Severus genuinely didn't care.

"Nox" Lily whispered before she slowly crept under her black silk sheets carefully hoping that nothing would grab her foot or pop up and scare her.

Lily whispered a quick spell and all the candles were put out, the room was now pitch black. She pulled the dark green duvet over her head, like a barrier from evil and shut her eyes in hopes to fall asleep soon. Suddenly a small tapping sound was heard, Lily gave a loud scream.

_Tap…tap…tap_

It was coming from the windows; Lily slowly crept out of the bed with wand in hand and went over to the window in question. Her heart pumped faster and faster as she quickly opened the curtain, it revealed nothing but a small brown owl with an envelope that was larger than the owl itself. Lily gave a sigh of relief and opened the window to let the owl in. Suddenly Severus rushed in through the door with a look to kill on his face.

"I heard a scream…" Severus said breathing heavily. Lily gave a quick blush and smiled.

"It was only an owl tapping on this window, I over reacted." She said turning a darker shade of red. Severus gave a sigh of relief and eyed the small owl suspiciously.

"Who is it from?" He asked catching a quick glimpse of who it was from.

"Oh it's only from…" Lily turned around to see the letter was from James. "It's from a friend." She quickly lied as she hid the letter behind her back. She felt absolutely horrid lying to Severus after he had been so kind. If he knew it was from James he would have had a fit.

"I see…" Severus said. "Good night." He said quickly leaving the room. Lily gave a sigh of relief; she was glad that Severus hadn't seen it was from James.

"_Lumos_" she whispered as she tore open the envelope. She was nervous of its contents; she was curious why James would write to her. Maybe he was begging for her back, maybe he finally realized that he needed her…or maybe it was the divorce forms she needed to sign. She took a deep breath before opening the neatly folded parchment.

_Dear Lily,_

_How are you? I'm sorry I was so rude the last time we met. Please apologize to Snape on my behalf; what I did was just out of rage but that still does not excuse my behavior. I understand my actions lately have caused large amount of grief on to you, apologizing wouldn't be enough. _

_Having some time to think, it made me realize how much you really meant to me. The amount of love I received from you, I was a lucky man. I'm sorry. I miss you Lily, I miss you so much. I miss the mornings where the first thing I see, are the lovely green eyes of the beautiful woman I love. I miss the time we spent rooting in front of the telli for different Quidditch teams and the bets we would make with each other. Now, when I look up, that person is no longer there because of what I have done. I miss you Lily, I know what I had done was completely selfish. I understand that you will not be able to forgive me quite as easily. Can we see each other for some tea? I think that a talk is needed no matter what the outcome is._

_Sincerely,_

_James Potter_

A giant tear hit the middle of the parchment as Lily read the letter. Each tear quickly trailed down her face than dropping on the parchment. She held the parchment close to her chest as she tried to weep as quietly as she could. With James, she could return to her old life and be happy with him, have children together just like they planned. But the only thing that stopped her was she could no longer mean it if she said she loved him with all her heart. Because her heart wanted someone else as well, it wanted Severus. Throughout the weeks, Severus had provided the love and caring for she craved. Before she knew it, she couldn't get him off her mind. That poor little boy, who lived on Spinners Edge, had grown to become a fine man. The problem was that she was probably nothing more than just a friend to him. She didn't have a secure spot with him. Somewhere in her heart there was a part screaming for Severus, she loved it when he would smile, in fact she couldn't wait to see him smile next. She felt protected by him, as cheesy as it sounded; he was her knight in shining armor that faithfully protected her.

However, now that her Prince had returned for her, the Knight wasn't needed. She quickly wiped away her tears and reread the letter once more. James was sorry and everything was going to be back as normal again, except better. She would have a family with James while being friends with Severus. And who knows, maybe the two would finally learn to get along. Lily smiled, she was starting to become more and more excited about life taking its course again. She quickly pulled out a roll of fresh parchment and replied with a set time and date.

"Thank you…" Lily smiled sweetly as she looked on as the small owl got farther and farther until she could no longer see it in the distance. She gently crawled back into bed; suddenly she was no longer afraid of the dark.

Severus stood by Lily's bedroom in shock. Potter had the balls to send her an owl…and Lily kept it a secret from him.

_Well it's none of your business _A dark voice said in his mind. _After all, she was never yours. _

Severus snapped back into reality as he heard Lily sob quietly.

"Please don't cry…" He whispered weakly, his heart ached that he couldn't go in and comfort her. His heart felt like it was in agony hearing her soft sobs. She was in pain, the git must have written something awful.

"Thank you…" Lily said unaware the Severus was listening. Severus' eyes jolted open; he felt his heart throb painfully.

_Those weren't sobs of pain, they were tears of happiness._ Severus thought as he stumbled back into his room. His chest felt heavy as a brick, his mind was filled with unanswered questions. She was going to leave him, _again_. He couldn't take it anymore. But he had no right to stop her, and that's what killed him the most. Potter had everything that Severus didn't have, including the woman of his dreams. He viciously turned on his side and closed his eyes. He fought the tears that were coming to his eyes.

_Stop it! STOP!_ A vicious voice yelled in his mind. _Emotions are for the weak_! However, Severus had a difficult time that night trying to contain his sadness. He was right from the start; life wouldn't grant him such a thing. No, he was destined to be miserable for the rest of his god damn life. _  
_

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**a/n: I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Next chapter will be sometime around May 20th 2010. Hopefully I will update before than. Please R&R! As some authors out there know, its quite lovely to receive reviews heh heh! See you next chapter!**


	16. Chapter 16: Love, James

One Night with Severus Snape

Disclaimer: Am I a woman? Yes. Am I insanely rich? No. Is my name JK Rowling? No. Therefore, I do not own Harry Potter.

Authors Note: Hello again people, chapter 16 is here! I believe that this is probably the longest chapter yet. I would like to make a note that in the book it is noted that Lucius is older than Severus but I would like to change that in my fanfiction and make it that he and Severus are the same age. I would like to thank: **suns and stars**, **David Boreanaz's wife247**, **Starsmile**, **Matrice**, **IonicAmalgam** and, **David Fishwick **for their reviews for chapter 15! Last chapter was painful to write (especially towards the end…) I apologize if there is any information wrong in this chapter; I blame it on my cold. At the moment, I sound like I have smoked 10 packs of cigs for the last 100 years (Sexy, I know. My voice makes all the boys come to the yard.) Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

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Severus Snape sat at his usual seat for breakfast, the scowl on his face was worse than usual. He stabbed his breakfast sausage violently as he thought of James Potter. He imagined in his mind that the sausage was James and the ketchup was blood. Severus' hatred for James had escalated in a mere 10 hours; as one could imagine his sleep was greatly affected by this. The only thing keeping him awake was a simple potion that he brewed earlier in the morning, but that still didn't mean his mood was going to get any better. Every so often he would glance towards Lily and notice that she looked happier than usual. He knew all too well that it was because of James and he absolutely hated it. Severus decided to cram the rest of the food down his throat and leave the table early. He needed to calm down and he found it extremely difficult to be calm while being surrounded by such idiots.

"You're leaving?" Dumbledore's piercing blue eyes twinkled at him as Severus got up.

"Yes" Severus said nonchalantly. "I have a few things I'd like to do before classes start."

"Oh… I see." Dumbledore smiled but he did not look convinced. Lily watched Severus turn his heel and leave before the Headmaster could ask anything else. She wondered why Severus had been in such a foul mood this morning; she could almost see the thundercloud above his head. She stared at his back as he angrily left the Great Hall. She hadn't seen him this angry, ever. Lily silently pondered for reasons why Severus would be so angry, she was absolutely sure that he hadn't seen James' name on the envelope. After a few minutes of thinking her stomach gave an uncomfortable churn.

_Oh no…_Lily thought fearfully. She still had the picture of him and the mysterious brunette that she had packed accidently. He had probably noticed that his precious picture was missing and was fuming about it. She looked down at her eggs and wondered how she possibly was going to explain having the picture.

It had been a minute after class had started and Severus violently paced towards his classroom. When he arrived he had slammed the doors open causing the students to jump. Each student's eyes followed their angry professor till he reached the front of the classroom. After a brief pause he quickly turned his heel and faced the class.

"Well?" His dangerous voice echoed the room. "Why haven't you opened your textbooks?"

Each student desperately opened their textbook fearing what would happen if they didn't obey their already enraged professor. No one knew what page to turn to; most students guessed what page would be the closest. After a while, a brave Gryffindor mustered the courage to ask what page they were supposed to turn to.

"Don't know what page to turn to?" Severus looked at each of his students menacingly. "How disappointing"

They all looked up at his dark black eyes hoping that he wouldn't get angrier than he already was.

"Page 11" Severus finally said. "For the lack of keeping up to your studies, your homework will be to write at least 14 inches on parchment about firedrakes. I expect them on my desk by next week."

Once he sat down he decided to be 'kind' enough to let the idiots start their homework early because he was definitely in no mood to teach. As he watched the students desperately scribbling away on parchment, he couldn't stop thinking about James Potter. He sat on his chair gripping his wand tighter and tighter as he thought about it more. He couldn't stand losing to the git anymore. For a moment, Severus regretted giving his students the homework because it just meant he would have to waste away time reading and marking their stupid little paper.

For the rest of the day he couldn't stop thinking about James, it made him sick thinking that James Potter was going to charm his way through another mess without dealing with the consequences. In Severus' point of view, James always managed to weasel his way out by just charming his teachers. In everyone's eyes, James Potter was nothing but the golden Gryffindor who was brave and a young handsome man who was skilled at everything, he was a celebrity. James Potter wasn't the kind celebrity that everyone thought he was, Severus saw right through him, he was nothing but an arrogant prick that did nothing but lie through his teeth in order to get what he wanted.

For both lunch and dinner, Severus quickly finished his food and stormed back into his chambers. Lily was a bit disappointed because it meant that Severus was going to be in his room, so she wouldn't be able to put the picture back in the book without him noticing. Lily gave a deep sigh, even though it had only been a day she felt rather lonely not to talk with Severus. She hoped that he would still be kind enough to give her the usual lessons on Defense Against the Dark Arts.

_Well,_ Lily thought to herself. _I guess I'll have James to talk to soon…_ She was a bit nervous about meeting James as well; she wanted Severus' advice on what to do. A part of her wished that he would stop her and tell her he loved her and couldn't bear seeing her go off with another man. She shook her head and reminded herself that there was no way that Severus would have romantic feelings for her.

_Stop thinking Lily_ she desperately thought to herself.

_It's getting harder to go back to James now isn't it?_ A wicked thought passed through her mind.

_No!_ Lily thought back. _Stop! _The wicked voice just laughed.

_The more you think about Severus, the more you realize your feelings don't you? Poor naïve little Lily, why would he bother with you? He's already got himself that gorgeous brunette from that picture._

_He hasn't gone out to see her! Maybe they broke up!_ Lily tried to convince herself but wasn't doing very well.

_Ha! I bet that during those times he slips away in the middle of the night he's off to see his precious girlfriend. Better get used to seeing her around._

At this point Lily found it hard to counter that thought. The negative thought was quite clever and made a valid point. She really didn't know where he was going off to in the middle of the night, and it wasn't like she had the right to ask.

_Well…There was that one time…where he…_Lily thought to herself and started blushing as she imagined Severus' lips on her neck again.

_It was nothing_ the thought hissed. _You were probably nothing but a piece of meat that was available for his pleasure!_

At this point Lily was starting to become really upset, she looked around the Great Hall for anything that could distract her. Her eyes went to the Ravenclaw table and saw a group of girls sitting around Cambyses. They were all smiling and on each arm he had a girl cozying up to him, Lily felt disgusted and decided that she needed another distraction. She turned to her side where there was a quiet man that she had never really talked to.

"So how was your day?" Lily turned to the awkward man who jumped from the sound of her voice.

"F-f-f-fine…" The man stuttered immediately. "…How about yours?"

"It was interesting; I'm really enjoying the job. I'm still trying to get the Slytherins to like me." She gave a nervous chuckle.

"…I see" The man smiled. After an awkward silence Lily decided to leave before being harassed by her old professor Slughorn who seemed more than eager to talk to her all the time.

"Well…It was nice talking to you…Can you please remind me what your name was?" Lily smiled awkwardly.

"Quirinus Quirrell" The man nervously shook her hand.

"Nice talking to you Quirinus." Lily smiled and walked out the Great Hall.

Severus was back in his chambers brewing another potion again, it was one of the few things that calmed him. Although he wasn't completely calm, it was doing a better job than anything else could do. For a moment he contemplated making a Love Potion for Lily but knew that it was unfair to Lily, impossible to create true love with the potion and would rather be caught dead than found making a love potion. He also contemplated making a hate potion so Lily could not be blinded by the charm of James, so she would finally realize how much of a git he really was. Severus found it very hard not to really do it because he knew that if Lily ever found out she would _kill_ him. Thankfully Severus was distracted by the sound of Lily returning. He began to wonder how he would approach her into reviewing over some of the subjects for Defense Against the Dark Arts tonight, he found it even more difficult to talk to her now that he knew about James' owl.

In the mean time, Lily went into her room and found another letter left by an owl from James. James had asked for possibly tonight or tomorrow night. Just as Lily was going to write back to James accepting the deal for tomorrow night she heard a knock on the door. She quickly hid the letter under the bed and walked over to the door. Unfortunately for Lily, Severus heard the cluttering and managed to sneak a peak of the letter through Occlumency (conveniently without her noticing, he felt incredibly guilty and sweared on his love for Lily that he would never spy on her like that again) and it only made his mood worse. Instead of asking her if she wanted to study for DADA he felt that he was supposed to leave her alone now.

"Severus!" Lily smiled.

"Good evening. I'm not interrupting anything am I?" He asked innocently.

"Oh no, of course not!" Lily desperately replied than gave her most convincing smile. She almost felt like he could read her mind.

"I see" Severus replied. "I was hoping to postpone our little…appointment, for tomorrow night." He smirked, he knew that there probably wouldn't be time for her to see James tonight and if he took up time tomorrow, she would most likely postpone her meeting with James later. Severus also figured that he needed time to calm down before he went to the Death Eater meeting tonight and getting close to her at the moment would definitely make _dirty_ things cross his mind.

"Of course" Lily replied quickly feeling a bit disappointed. "Are you leaving again tonight?" Severus' eyes had shot open; he hadn't realized that she noticed him leaving at times for meetings with the Dark Lord late at night. "…I'm sorry," Lily quickly said. "It's none of my business…"

_Look at him!_ The nasty thought hissed again. _He's flustered; he really is going to meet that girl tonight!_ Lily's heart clenched at the thought of Severus meeting with another woman. She quickly reminded herself that Severus wasn't her man and she needed to quit being so…protective over him.

"Yes, I am" Severus finally replied. "…Business for the school." He lied.

"Oh I see…"Lily's heart sank. He had lied to her, she fought back the tears, and she desperately wanted to stop him. She wanted him to leave the wretched woman who he was off seeing. "Well…Good night. Hope you have a safe trip…see you in the morning." She smiled sadly.

"…Goodnight" Severus replied before turning his back and walking away. Severus wondered if Lily knew that he was lying about doing business for the school. There was a possibility that Potter had written in the letter notifying Lily that he was indeed a Death Eater. Severus immediately regretted lashing out at James and telling his enemy something that could be used against him. He stormed back into his room and went to lie down on his bed which reeked of some of the potions he had made in the past few weeks.

Lily jumped on her bed and stuffed her face in the pillow, she felt the urge to cry but wasn't sure why. Actually a part of her knew why but the other half refused to admit it. She had _actually_ developed feelings for Severus but she didn't want to…She wasn't supposed to. She didn't want to ruin her wonderful friendship with Severus. They had just reunited their friendship and she had to go and start liking him. She couldn't believe what a burden she was; it wasn't fair to him or _that_ woman. Well, she could care less how _that_ woman felt but still, it wasn't like her to want another man who was in a relationship. No, Lily found those types of women disgusting, she thought of them as dirt and here she was, in that position. She was absolutely disgusted with herself.

_Why did he have to go see that woman anyways? It wasn't like she was all that pretty…Ok she was gorgeous but still. _Lily was immediately jealous of a woman she had never met…much like that Alexia girl James was probably with…Well…it was apparent now that Alexia and James never worked out.

She continued to lie there thinking more and more about Severus to a point where tears started coming out and dampening the pillows. She remembered that picture of Severus with the woman; _that_ woman's hands were touching him and his hands, the same hands he held Lily with that one time, were on the mystery woman. Oh and how could she forget that intimate kiss the woman had given Severus in the picture! That woman's red full lips were on his lips, and he looked like he enjoyed it. Severus had a rather loving look in his eye, a look that Severus had never given her.

_Tonight, _Lily thought. _He's going to go see that woman and they are probably going to have some romantic dinner. Severus would probably mention that their favorite picture was missing and that's why he had a bad day today. She would probably comfort him with 'why don't we take another one?' and then when he comes back, he'll probably frame it up somewhere, so he won't 'lose' it again. Then, they would go upstairs and…_Lily's heart gave a rather tight clench this time, he was going off to see another woman. She began to feel lonely; she missed having someone there to hold her when she was sad. She craved a comforting hug, not from a friend but from someone she loved. She continued to keep her face in the pillow so her sobs were silent. Suddenly (or rather conveniently for the authors sake), the same brown owl from the night before tapped on the window again. This time it held a small brown package instead of a letter. Lily looked at the package curiously and slid the window open for the tiny owl.

"Thanks little one" she sniffed as she pet the owl. She gently opened the package which revealed a white lily with a note on the side.

_It reminded me of you_

_Love, _

_James_

Lily gave a sheepish grin, she had James. That's how life had made it; Severus was to be with that other woman while she was with James. She slowly pulled out the parchment from under the bed and she decided to reply to James. After some thought she decided that it would take too much time, so she did the next best thing. She pulled out her best looking outfit and cast a quick glamour charm, grabbed her coat and left. Since apparating on school grounds was against the rules she decided that apparating once she was off school grounds would be alright.

Severus flinched as he heard the entrance of his chambers close. He rushed out of his room, through the living room and to the corridor to see the Lily had left. His eyes shot open as he began to realize what was happening. Lily was off to meet Potter and he could do nothing about it. However, Severus couldn't take losing her anymore; he lost her once and nearly lost his mind. He was no longer a naïve 15 year old; he wasn't the weak little loser he used to be, it wasn't like him to run away like a wimp anymore.

Severus ran out of his corridors and up the stairs to catch Lily, once he reached the long dark corridors he looked to his to his left than to his right, there was no sign of Lily. He quickly turned his heel and began rushing back to his chambers but ran into a familiar face.

"P-P-Professor Sssssssssnape!" Quirinus jumped. "How pleasant to…to…see you here."

"Evening" Severus bitterly answered he had no time to chit chat at the moment. With Quirinus' stuttering a 2 minute conversation would take up at least 5 times the time it should.

"G-g-g-g-getting r-r-r-r-ready for the meeting tttttonight?" He whimpered.

"…I don't know whatever you are talking about." Severus replied. As he learned in the past, Dumbledore's hearing was like a hawk. He could hear _everything_ and he knew _everything._ He was also pretty damn sure that Dumbledore _must_ be skilled at old fart denied it when Severus asked but he was pretty damn sure that Dumbledore was quite capable of it.

"T-t-t-the meeting with our L-l-l-lord, you cccccouldn't have forgotten?" Quirinus whimpered again as he shook.

"Lord?" Severus glared back. "I have no idea what you are talking about." Severus than rushed passed the confused Quirinus. He was on a much more important mission; he rushed back to his chambers and ran towards the window. At the far distance he could see a small figure walking away, than the figure apparated.

Severus angrily kicked the cupboards; he didn't know where she was going to. She could have gone to the bar to meet Potter, his house, Diagon Alley, some hotel, one of their friends' houses, she could be anywhere in England. Severus grabbed a glass of whiskey, who cares if he goes to the Death Eater meeting drunk? It wasn't like it was the first time someone had done it.

_How pitiful_ Severus thought to himself. _The love of your life is off to be with the man you absolutely hate and all you can do is sit here and drink whiskey. _

Severus laid back on his leather chair and looked up at the ceiling, and spaced out. He just kept drinking more and more whiskey. The only feeling he had left was the light brown liquid burning as it went down his throat.

_Bitter and an alcoholic, just like your father_ Severus thought to himself. He was becoming someone he swore he wouldn't be. _Another failure to add to my miserable life _he thought as he took another swig.

_Ah, Severus_ chipped in another dark thought. _How could you, who is a Death Eater and has a love for the Dark Arts, fall in love with something, someone so pure? Someone who is so innocent! A dirty man like you will remain tainted for the rest of your life. _

The thought was right, Death Eaters weren't exactly known to be muggle lovers extremists, and here was Severus Snape the jolly old Death Eater who had been in love with a bloody muggle for his entire fucking life.

Severus stumbled off his chair to get ready for the little meeting he was expected to attend. As he drunkenly pulled on his robes he wondered if his love for the Dark Arts was what was massively cock blocking him from being with Lily Evans. Severus quickly pushed the idea aside, Lily didn't know that he was involved with the Dark Lord and there was no way in hell that Lily would find him attractive. Severus was well aware that his looks weren't exactly prince charming, however he didn't care to become 'attractive' in societies standards. Yes, there were times where he did curse his luck for being as unattractive as he was but he never saw the use to 'clean himself up.' Lucius had even volunteered to help him (by him, he meant he would order the house elves to do all the work of course) look better to help pull in the ladies, but Severus gladly refused.

He had rather not take any interest than Lily, until he met one woman. Her luscious chestnut brown hair, skin as smooth as Lily's, green eyes (like Lily), and a beautiful smile (like Lily.) Her name was Alexia Boldrewood, she came from a powerful pureblood wizarding family, and she attended Beauxbatons for school. Alexia was good friends with one of the many women Lucius had flings with; Severus had been introduced to Alexia a few months after the whole 'mudblood' incident with Lily. They originally hung out during school breaks with Lucius and his fuck toy at the time, after a while, Alexia and Severus met with just each other. Towards the end of 7th year, Alexia green eyes looked right into Severus' dark eyes; she told him she liked him more than a friend. That was when she went and kissed Severus right on the lips, as one could imagine he was quite red, a shade that would have made any Gryffindor proud. That was when the two started dating, no one from school knew except Lucius who just kept grinning like an idiot towards Severus. Once Voldemort found out he was extremely pleased with the choice that Severus took. As time went by, Severus began loving her. Sometimes he wondered whether he was in love with the green eyes that resembled Lily or not. However, the moment they were engaged things started going downhill. Alexia was barely around, she wasn't as affectionate as before, she was more demanding and at some points he felt as if he were buying her love. They fought more often and she often blamed Severus for appearing distant, appearing as if he loved another woman (which was true but no one knew about it) and he was cold. Each time he thought he was done with her, the pair of seductive green eyes returned and after that he was back in his trance that people called love.

One day, Lucius had apparated into Severus' home in Spinners End with a look of panic. Lucius informed Severus that Alexia was working at a shabby muggle strip club for quite some time (Although Lucius never said why he was in a _muggle_ strip club.) Severus' couldn't believe it, but when he went to check whether Lucius was playing a sick joke on him or not, he realized that he was speaking the truth. After that things went ugly and Alexia left him, Severus' still had strong feelings for Alexia (not as strong feelings as his love for Lily) and searched for her. She had quit the strip club that she had worked in and after that he completely lost track of her. After that Severus scoffed at the idea of love, there was no such thing as true love. Look at his father, how could he treat someone he was supposed to love so poorly, Alexia said she loved him which was probably a lie all along, and as much as he respected his good loyal friend (although not so loyal to Narcissa) he said he loved Narcissa but Severus sometimes wondered whether those were empty words or not. Severus had learned that no matter how much one cared about another, that didn't change a thing. Narcissa cared about Lucius more so than herself, Severus had _adored_ Lily, and his own mother never gave up on his father. It was that moment and on Severus had purely understood from the bottom of his heart that the more you care, the more hurt you get and you were going to be miserable for your entire life. So than onwards, Severus put up a wall around himself, he refused to let anyone get close. After that women threw themselves at him, determined to be the one that 'saved' him or because they like 'bad boys.' Severus really gave less than two shits at that point; he just wanted to enjoy himself with the company of Lucius and a good drink. That night when Lily bumped into him, was like life was telling him to start caring again. Of course, here he was on his way to a fun little gathering as he let his ticket to happiness go.

Severus got up and left his chambers, he knew the schedules of all the teachers. Students were forbidden to be fumbling around the corridors at the time, and he knew exactly what paths the other professors were patrolling. Even if someone did come along, he could always cast a helpful memory charm and they would never know what hit them (literally.) As he left the castle he looked up at the sky through his mask, he wondered what Lily was up to. He wondered if she was safe and if she was happy. He looked forward seeing her the next day but at the same time he dreaded it. Severus glanced around the area to see that nobody was there and then apparated.

When Severus arrived, he was more than happy that his mask was covering his face. He really was in no mood to be socialized with. He just wanted to finish the meeting get back and have a few more drinks before passing out. However, his cover was blown the moment Voldemort walked in and specially requested that Severus sit next to him.

"Thank you master" Severus bowed and sulked over to his seat, a seat that every Death Eater aspired to sit in at one point. As Voldemort continued on about how he was predicting that somewhere out there, whether it be France, England, Russia, Germany, anywhere in Europe if not, somewhere in the world there was someone plotting his downfall. There was a chance that they would succeed and it was the Death Eaters job to prevent it. Severus knew that if anyone would be able to able to defeat Voldemort, there was only one person, Albus Dumbledore. As much as the old man appeared to be senile and fragile the man was capable of things that one could only imagine, the only difference between the two was that Albus was a peace loving pussy. Voldemort took it in his hands to get power, become the world's most powerful wizard. He had succeeded, but Severus knew just as well as Voldemort that once you are on top, there will always be someone who will knock you down, right back to the bottom. That is why Voldemort wanted Severus to stay in Hogwarts; to keep an eye on Dumbledore and so he could take over Hogwarts from the inside. Severus figured that Quirinus was working in Hogwarts for the same reason (even though he wasn't quite a professor yet he was 'training' to be one.)

As soon as the meeting ended, Severus rushed out so he could avoid certain people. However he was stopped by the exact person he was avoiding.

"My my Severus, you seem like you are in such a hurry to leave I wonder why?" Bellatrix asked as she closed in on him. "I haven't been able talk to you since our last _meeting_." She purred as she licked her lips. At this point Severus was against the wall and Bellatrix was nearly on top of him. "I've missed you."

"Get off of me" Severus growled pushing her away. "Don't know your boundaries, how like you." However, Bellatrix didn't give up that easily she got up close to him again and brought her face to his neck.

"Been drinking have you?" She whispered as she inhaled his scent as her lips brushed up against his neck. "Rudolphus is away again, I'm so lonely" she gave a rather naughty giggle. Severus cringed; he really didn't want her to be this close to him.

"It seems as if you misunderstood me the first time" Severus said rather coldly as he glared down at her. "Get off of me."

"Playing hard to get are we?" She smiled seductively. "You don't have to, Rudolphus and I don't have the passion we used to. I'm sure he would understand." Severus gave a rather loud groan; she really didn't get the point. How dense was she?

"Come on Snape," she whispered again. "Help out this poor little girl would you?" She said as she led his hand slowly down her chest. Severus really wasn't in the mood for this, he didn't deny that he needed something to get his mind off Lily momentarily but still refused to stoop as low as Bellatrix. Without saying anything he glared at her one more time and pushed her off of him. He began to walk out violently as Bellatrix made a mocking pouty face.

"I'll get you next time" he heard her saying just before he apparated. Severus gave a heavy sigh and began pacing back into the castle, back into his comfy bed. He really wanted his day to end (although it was a few hours past midnight, so technically it already was the next day.)

When Severus returned back to his chambers, it was still empty just as he left it. It felt like someone had punched him in the stomach when he realized that Lily still had not returned. At one point he wondered when she was going to get back, she had classes to teach and at this point she would be so tired from the lack of sleep the next day she would cancel the little tutoring session with him. Severus passed out on his bed, he decided to sleep his misery off, he was sure he would be in a better mood when he woke up. He heard the door of the entrance creak open just as he was nodding off, he wasn't sure whether it was a dream or not, but fell deeply asleep before he could find out.

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**A/N: Hope you enjoyed the chapter...Chapter 17 will be about Lily's meeting with James and other stuff. Next chapter will most likely be May 28, give or take a few days. As usual R&R please! Thank you! See you next chapter.**


	17. Chapter 17: PS

One Night with Severus Snape

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

Author's Note: So I did this chapter a bit last minute, the week went by super fast and seeing that I was supposed to update like…a weeks ago…yep…well…I figured that I shouldn't keep pushing it back. I was reading back last chapter to remind myself of what I wrote last time…I came across that I had written 'Severus angrily kicked the cupboards.' That's not really possible is it? Well, it kind of is but you would have to try really hard and I don't think that Severus is the type of person who would go out of his way to kick a cupboard in mid air. Anyways I would like to say why I am so late with updating, I am currently upgrading courses for college…so I am doing high school math…Math being my worst subject…I am attempting to cram a year worth of math in merely two weeks. I have come to conclusion that math is a legal way of torture that was invented by people who hate joy. Anyways, enjoy.

Special Thanks: **matrice**, **starsmile**, **David boreanaz's wife247**, **David Fishwick**, and the **Anonymous **reviewer! I enjoy the reviews quite a bit thank you.

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As I walked down the corridors for a moment, I swear I could have heard the doors of Severus' chambers open. I stopped for a moment and turned to see no one; I sighed and rushed out of the building before I changed my mind on meeting James. I walked out the castle and looked up at the dark starry sky; I wondered what fate had in store for me. The gentle breeze brushed up against my face felt comforting, it was reminding me that I was outside and I needed to go see James. Each step I took my heart was beating harder and harder, it felt like I was going to burst any second. Before I disapparated, I turned around to look at the castle and I swore I saw Severus looking at me from one of the windows. Than everything went black, I felt like something was crushing my body and then I arrived at my destination, outside the door of a place that was once called home in Godric's Hallow. My heart gave a painful twist, emotions started to release and I didn't know what to do. A simple task of knocking on the door was too difficult for me to do.

Questions filled my head, and the same emotions that I had from the night I left this house had arisen.

_Why did you become so cold?_

_What did I do wrong?_

_If something goes wrong again, will he go silent again?_

_Is he really going to take me back or is he just going to finalize things?_

As the questions continued to rush through, I remembered the short conversation we had before I had left a while ago.

That night, I was in so much shock, emotions were over flowing and I could no longer contain them. I wanted…no I _needed_ the answers. I wanted to persuade him to change his mind of not wanting to be with me anymore. I remember the strong stench of coffee filling the entire room, I had never liked coffee but James couldn't live without it. My legs shook and my mind became blank the moment I entered the kitchen.

"James" I called to him nervously. I couldn't read what he was thinking; he had always been able to control his emotions, much better than I could.

"…Hi." He replied. There was stiffness to his voice.

"Can we talk?" I asked, desperately hoping that he would agree to talk.

"…I'd rather not" He replied honestly while pouring cream into his coffee.

"James," I said with a hint of desperation in my voice. "We need to talk at some point."

"No we don't" he said, he hadn't looked at me once. "What is there to talk about?"

"We need to talk about our relationship!"

"I don't see a need to." He said now putting sugar into his coffee.

"I need answers James" I said in a voice forced of calm. "We need to talk about why things ended up like this." I was desperate to get him to talk, anything was good. A sentence would have been fine!

"I need time to be alone," He sighed, still avoiding eye contact with me. "Our relationship is over. What more is there to talk about?" I was beginning to feel frustrated, how could one be so cold towards someone they once loved?

"Things could have been fixed! I need answers!" I said a little more forcefully.

"Then talk." James said impatiently as he went to the fridge to return the cream.

"Why?" I said. "Why didn't you talk to me as soon as you started feeling like this?"

"Because I thought things would get better."

"What was it that went so wrong?" I asked hoping that my answer would be answered properly.

"I don't know. I just started feeling like this…Maybe I just became tired of you." He said after taking a sip of his coffee, still no eye contact with me.

"What exactly are you tired about?" I asked but he said nothing. "Why didn't you talk to me after a while?" I said realizing that he wasn't going to answer the previous question.

"Because it was bad timing, I mean you had that miscarriage and you were upset. Not exactly the best time to talk to you about our failing relationship." He replied coldly. He was right, it would have been a bad time to talk to me about something like that…but still, I would have wanted to know this relationship had meant a great deal to me.

"What about back in June? I kept asking you if there was something wrong and you kept telling me that you were fine!"

"I didn't really want to talk about it" he said rather plainly.

"Then there was no hope from the start?" I asked furiously, I bit my lip trying to hold back the tears. I couldn't cry right now, I had to be strong.

"…I don't know." He said in his annoyingly calm voice before taking another sip from his coffee.

"Then when was I supposed to ask? I can't read minds you know!" I had said fiercely. I remember thinking: _No Lily stop! Calm down, you have to stay calm! If you're angry there is no way in hell he would consider staying. _

"I don't know" James had said again. It was painful; it felt as if I were talking to a mirror. He knew the answers to my questions yet he refused to give me any.

"James," I began. "Please give this another chance. I'm doing better now, please." It had taken all I had in me to put aside the remaining pride I had and beg him to stay. If I didn't try then, than I would had wondered for the rest of my life if I would had been able to save this relationship from failing.

"Lily," He sighed. "I already have, and quite frankly I no longer feel the love that I felt for you before."

And at that point, I could no longer hold back from my tears. Tears were flowing down my face and I couldn't stop it. I turned away and tried hard to stop the tears but it wasn't possible, my heart was in too much pain. We both stood there in silence, I couldn't say anything. I was focused on calming down and trying to think of a plan, but nothing came to mind.

"Are we done now?" James said breaking the silence. I turned around and looked up at him to say something but that was when I met his eyes for the first time in this conversation. Without saying anything, he had caused so much pain. I felt like I could no longer breathe, like something was sitting on my chest and it felt like a brick had dropped in my stomach. I no longer saw the eyes that belonged to man who was in love, but instead I saw a pair of eyes looking at me pitifully. Right there was when I ran out of the kitchen in total shock.

And here I was now, sitting in front of the place I fled from, sitting on the stone step of the beautiful house. Somehow I wish that this would have happened earlier, because my heart was now torn into two. I reminded myself for probably for the tenth time in the past 5 minutes to stay focused that the main goal here was to make sure that my relationship with James is rekindled and this is my happily ever after.

I figure my crush for Severus was just temporary. Was it even a crush? My guess is that it will go away, after all he is just a rebound crush right? He was there for me when I felt disgraced and betrayed by James. But even for a crush, I couldn't get his name, his face out of my head. For so long, I had tried to erase him, escape the memories of him.

I got up and took a deep breath, it was already late and if I didn't hurry I would be even more inconvenient. I took another breath, _this was it_; my hand nervously shook towards the bell. Then I heard the lock unlock and the door opened to reveal a surprised James.

"Lily!" He said, I looked up and saw the same gentle features he had.

"Hi" I said nervously. "Sorry for showing up so late…I just…"

"Don't apologize, come on in." He said with a warm smile.

"Thanks" I said returning a smile. When I walked in I couldn't help but feel happy. Nothing had changed, it was _home_. The pictures of us together were still up on the wall, like nothing had changed. I followed James into the living room and we sat on the burgundy red couches.

Anyone who would have come in to look at us would have immediately known this was an awkward moment. The two of us sat there silent, not knowing what to say. There were so many things I wanted to say but I didn't know what I wanted to say first. The clock ticked loudly as we both sat there looking at the floor. Occasionally I would quickly glance at James and wonder what he was thinking. I wondered whether I was being a nuisance to him, after all I did come with no warning. Finally the silence was broken.

"I'm so glad you came" he said as he leaned towards me with a smile that looked like a mix of sadness. "I understand that you are probably angry with the way I have acted towards you…I mean…I would be upset too, I'm sorry…I just...I really would like to be together with you again, so I could have your trust again and that I could treat you the way you truly deserve...Gosh Lily…I missed you so much." My heart gave a leap of joy when I he said the last sentence.

"Oh James," I said tearing up immediately. "I missed you too…I couldn't stop thinking about you."

"The past few weeks I had time to think, I would keep catching myself hoping that things would eventually mend together again." He said in such a soft comforting voice, I couldn't stop crying, it felt as that the heavy stone on my chest had been lifted. "When you came to pack your things, I was childish…I'm sorry. I was foolish enough to realize how dear you are to me until you were gone." James stood up and sat next to me putting his arm gently around me. "I'm so sorry" he whispered as he pulled me into a hug me.

"I'm sorry too" I said in between tears. I didn't care if I had been crying too much at this point. My heart had been aching for this moment too long. I waited my part and now I was receiving my reward for being so patient.

"Can you give me another chance?" He had said the magic words that I had been aching to hear for so long. The words that I thought I would never hear him say; we were going to be back on track.

"Of course" I replied as I wrapped my arms around his neck and looked into his eyes. He leaned in for a kiss, at first my mind screamed no but my heart screamed yes.

"I think it may be a good idea to keep things slow." James said. "After all, we do have time." I smiled back at him, it was clear to me that he cared. No one could lie about something like that. I knew that we were going to be more in love than we were before. "Do you care for a drink? Maybe we can do some catching up."

"I really would love to but I have work in the morning…Maybe sometime over the weekend?" The offer was extremely tempting but tomorrow was an early start and I couldn't teach a class hung over.

"Work?" James said looking confused.

"Yeah, I'm currently teaching at Hogwarts." I said with a smile, it truly was a great job.

"Hogwarts?" James exclaimed. "Blimey Lily, that's awesome!"

"Thanks" I said quietly turning a bit pink. "I should get going…" In a way I was afraid of leaving, I was afraid that James would have some alone time and realize that he actually didn't want to get back together.

"Right," he said looking a bit disappointed. "I'll send you an owl to possibly make plans this Saturday."

"Alright" I said awkwardly it was like we were setting up a date for the first time. "See you" than I disapparated back to Hogsmeade.

When I had apparated to Hogsmeade, I looked around at the dark empty place. It was usually filled with people and the shops were brightly lit. At night, it seemed like a place where the victim in a horror movie would go to get murdered. My mind was filled with my meeting with James but at the same time I couldn't help but jump when I saw a shadow moving. I looked around as I walked cautiously but quickly back to Hogwarts. As I got closer and closer to Hogwarts my heart started thumping faster and faster, I was afraid that someone would mug me. I was afraid that the moment I was a step away from the castle, someone would kill me. I couldn't die now, my life had just begun. My life was starting be filled with happiness.

When I finally entered the castle, I crept down the dark corridors. It was eerily quiet and I could barely see a thing, even with my wand. I looked around expecting something to pop out, I prayed that Peeves wasn't feeling particularly troublesome but that was just as possible as getting Severus to dye his hair bright pink or change his wardrobe to the Gryffindor house colors (although that would be amusing to see.) As I continued to pace down the dark corridor, I kept my eyes on the floor. I was glad that Professor Dumbledore had given me an exemption from having to patrol the school at night. Although having been a student at Hogwarts for 7 years, the thought of ghosts still irked me. I was hoping with all my heart that the Bloody Baron or Nearly Headless Nick wasn't taking a midnight stroll. I quickly looked around in the corridors that were usually packed with students talking loudly with each other, but at this time I was the only one who was there. My steps echoed through out the hallways instead of the chatter of students. I finally returned to the chambers and saw that Severus was already back, either that or _that_ woman was probably here (which was highly unlikely.) My heart gave a quick jump when the doors I was closing gave a rather loud creaking noise. I climbed into my bed and looked at the white lily that James had sent me earlier that evening. Things were finally better; things were working out just the way I wanted it to.

When Lily had woken up in the morning there was a large brown owl tapping on the window, it was James again. She had remembered that he had mentioned something about going for a drink over the weekend and catching up. She gave a loud groan and fumbled out of bed to open the window. The owl gave a loud screech sounding eager to leave so it could go back and catch some more sleep. Lily untied the parchment from its foot and read the letter. James had asked if it was alright to meet her around 10 at night at the Three Broomsticks on Saturday night. He also mentioned bringing Sirius and Peter along over the weekend and possibly Remus providing that he had recovered from the full moon two nights ago. Lily smiled happily to herself knowing that she was going to see her friends. She was so hurt the night James had rejected her because she felt that at the same time she had lost Sirius, Remus and Peter as friends.

...

Lily fumbled around her room looking for a quill and a piece of parchment as the owl impatiently hooted at her. When the owl had finally left, she looked at the time to see that she had about 2 hours before everyone headed to the great hall for breakfast. In a way she was slightly irritated that James had sent her an owl so early in the morning but she was so excited to hear from him as well. Lily walked out of the room and into the hallway to take an early morning bath.

Lily stripped her clothes off and walked down the green marble steps into the clear grass green water that smelled like of a forest after the rain. This was Lily's favorite room. It was a large misty room with green marble flooring with a ceiling bewitched to look like the sky just as the Great Hall did. There was the grass green water flowing out of the two great white marble serpents on each side of the steps. When she had asked the other teachers, she was told that the bath rooms were built to accommodate each of the houses. According to Minerva McGonagall, since she was the head of Gryffindor, she had cool white marble flooring with light red colored water coming out from two large lions. As much as Lily was a proud Gryffindor, she didn't completely find the idea of bathing in red water as appealing as the tranquil green water that she got to bathe in. She wondered if the head of Hufflepuff had lemon yellow water which sounded even more unappealing to bath in, but the deep blue colored water for Ravenclaw sounded pretty nice.

After an hour or so she felt rejuvenated, she slipped into her robes for the day and decided to go into the living room to see whether Severus had awaked or not. Lily lately had developed an odd guilty pleasure of peeking through the glass fireplace which was completely see through into where Severus was sleeping. She opened the great wooden doors and walked into the living room with high stone walls with beautifully aged wooden flooring, the velvet green curtains were closed as always making the room appear darker than it actually was. She closed the door slowly behind her hoping that he would not wake up.

Meanwhile, Severus was sleeping cozily on his nice queen sized couch bed. He was having a rather nice dream, some sort of dream with joyless children. When he had woken up he glanced up to see that he had at least another hour before he needed to get to breakfast. He didn't want to come out of bed because his bed was so comfortable and his dream was so wonderful. He turned on his other side to get comfortable again. He opened his eyes and met a pair of large green emerald eyes staring at him. He slid up quickly only to see that the pair of eyes belonged to Lily who was smiling at him. She had found it a bit amusing that for a moment, he had a look of fear in his eyes when he had saw her (as sadistic as that sounded.)

Severus stared at her momentarily before realizing that everything was safe. He noticed that she seemed much happier than yesterday and it hurt to realize that it was most likely because of James Potter. He wondered if they got back together the night before and that was why she was in such a good mood. Was there a possibility that they had gotten back together for good and that she was up to tell him that she and James were going to be happily together forever and that Severus need to get the hell out of their happy picture. Lily was taken aback by the pained look that he gave her; he seemed reluctant to leave his room. His eyes staring deeply into her like he was trying to read her. They sat there still for a moment, neither saying a single word. Severus longed to have her, but he didn't know what to do, he could feel her slipping through his fingers. He hated how the brain shut down when people were losing the one they loved. His eyes searched her face for hope, but for once he couldn't read people or intimidate information out of them. Severus' heart pained deeply, they were happy and he shouldn't get in the way. For once, his heart and his mind were torn into two and he couldn't tell which what the logical answer was. For years he had ran on his little treadmill in hopes of happiness but even now there was not a drop of happiness in store for him. Everyone was happy except him and now, he was going to lose the one he truly loved, again.

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**A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I will try to update sometime in the next two weeks! Please review, they make me happy!**


	18. Chapter 18: Watch out

One Night with Severus Snape

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

Authors note: Hello everyone I apologize for this chapter for taking forever. Taking some courses for school, which is practically killing me. Sometimes during the teachers ramblings I would write ideas for the chapters on the side of my notes...Severus would be disappointed in me...-cries- Anyways, I may have more time to write now seeing that I have a leg injury that makes it so I have to have bed rest for 2 weeks. So no school for me, and plus since my parents are going away and want my boyfriend to look after me, we get to play house. But he'll be at work a lot so I'll be using that time to maybe write some chapters. For people who are reading Amaranth I promise that I haven't forgotten it, I will update soon. Oh yeah, have people seen the poster for the next Harry Potter movie, the one with the doe...That is AMAZING. It sent chills down my spine...I love it. I find it a suitable poster.

Thank you's: **David Fishwick**, **David boreanaz's wife 247**, **starsmile**, **matrice**, **Alethea27** and all the other readers reading/favorited/alerted this story. Thank you, it means a great lot to me and it makes me happy that people enjoy reading this story.

Enough rambling from me, I present you...CHAPTER 18!

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It was a bright sunny day, with a cool autumn breeze in the air. The Whomping Willows leaves had turned a brilliant shade of red and yellow. By Hagrids hut were great big orange pumpkins ready to be carved or cooked for the great Halloween feast that was just around the corner. Lily was taking a walk around the grounds where the students were lying lazily taking in the last bit of sunshine before the weather declined. Lily gazed upon the Whomping Willow where none of the students even dared to go near. She often wondered if there were other students before or after Remus that used it to seek protection before or after he attended Hogwarts, to protect not only themselves but others as the full moon shone above to reveal their fearful figures.

The magical world was something only muggles could imagine; they were completely unaware that something such as a werewolf would be lurking around at night waiting for their next unknown victim. She could only imagine how lonely Remus felt before the Marauders decided to have an animagus form to accompany him during the full moon. At the time she didn't appreciate the amounts of laws and school rules they were breaking, especially as head girl, she was worried for their safety. However by the end of the night, they would all return with slightly exhausted but joyful looks on their faces, as if they had the greatest adventures of their lives. The Marauders friendship was something that most students envied, they were willing to stick with each other through the thick and the thin. There was James who was the leader of the group, Sirius the unfailing sidekick, Remus the brains of the group and Peter, their number one fan.

When Lily had become good friends with them, she would often tease them that she would spill it all to Dumbledore, the look of terror and their pleading faces were really quite entertaining. However, at times, Lily suspected that Dumbledore was fully aware of what they were doing just by the twinkle in his eyes. Whenever the full moon was nearing, it almost seemed as if he were smiling at them from the front of the Great Hall.

She thought back to those times and remembered glancing towards Severus and every so often they would both catch each other gazing upon the other wondering how they were doing. Whenever that would happen, she would turn right back around and pretend that she saw nothing, but the pained look in Severus' eyes was etched deep into her mind. As time went by she had noticed that at times he looked happier, and she wondered to herself if he had forgotten about their friendship. She should have realized then how much their friendship had meant to him. He had apologized repeatedly and even threatened to camp outside the Gryffindor common room from time to time. She didn't realize it than but it required a lot of courage to do that considering that he would have been an open target to the Marauders. She wondered if she were there for him he would have been less bitter, if she could have saved him from the darkness within. The past few months she had spent with him, she noticed that not once had he been close to utter the word mudblood. She smiled to herself knowing that he had probably put in a lot of effort to fix his mistakes. She was however, quite curious with what had happened to his friendship with Malfoy, Avery and Mulciber. He seemed pretty close to them and even more so after the whole incident. At times she would glance towards the Slytherin table and see that Severus looked quite happy, and every time she would feel a dagger go straight to her heart, she was truly afraid that he had forgotten about her.

Even after the whole incident, she decided that she would try to protect him from afar, in the shadows. However, there was a part of her that wished that he would find out about her secret actions and learned that she still cared and that she didn't completely abandon him. However, her pride was one of the main things that stopped the friendship from ever reconciling things, plus she was supposed to be angry with him. Truth was that the day after the incident when she woke up, she wasn't as angry. But, he had called her the unforgivable 'm' word in front of everyone, of course she felt humiliated! She couldn't just look up and smile at him, no she was hurt. She felt betrayed, she had made excuses in the past for him, how she was different from everyone to him or that he didn't really think badly of muggles. But at the time, it felt like to her that no matter whom you were, a celebrity, a priest or the greatest wizard alive or his best friend, if they were a muggle born, they were nothing but a mudblood in his eyes.

After graduation, Lily came to conclusion that was really the end of their friendship. Even if she lived near him she couldn't bear to even go near his house, what would he think of her if she did? Did he hate her? All these questions filled up her mind and when she married James, but he was all she needed. For a while she neglected her other friendships with people such as Mary and Selena but everyday she fell more and more in love with James. He filled her heart with joy but there was one place that he couldn't fill was the place that Severus always had. Even though she had given up, when she would get her make up on, or go to the library or grocery shopping she hoped deep down in her heart that she would run into him. He would than apologize again, and that would be when their friendship would be reconciled. But as days, months and years passed she began to give up. Than, that fateful night happened. It was destiny for them to become best friends again…Well he was her best friend but she didn't know what he thought of her.

In just two months her surroundings had drastically changed and things were going quite well. Her eyes were dry from tears and for once in a long time, her heart felt full because she had both James and Severus by her side. Her life was now complete.

xxxx

James slid down comfortably on his blood red arm chair with a look of satisfaction plastered across his face. In front of him sat his confused friends, Sirius, Peter and Remus. James had looked as if he achieved a great goal, almost as if he solved world hunger. None of his friends had ever seen him look as satisfied since their last grand prank before leaving Hogwarts for the last time.

"You're glowing" Sirius said as he sat on the sofa across from him. James gave a mischievous smirk towards the gang.

"I assume that you have resolved things with Lily?" Remus said noting the pictures around the house but he had a hint of suspicion in his voice. James was glowing with happiness, but not the type of happiness one gets after reconciling with their loved one. No, his smile was much darker than that.

"Indeed I have" James said with a hint of malicious intent in his voice. Sirius sat there trying to organize his thoughts, he couldn't help but think of the conversation the two had a few days ago. He had a bit of difficulty trying to figure out whether James was serious or not. He wanted to believe that his friend would not do such thing, but his peculiar behavior was making Sirius think otherwise. Sirius quickly glanced towards Remus who seemed to have caught on quickly to what James real intentions were.

"That's wonderful!" Peter said happily as he clasped his pudgy hands together. It appeared that he was the only one who hadn't caught on to James' acrimonious behavior.

"Thank you Peter" James smiled, looking towards Remus and Sirius to say something similar but the two were too busy trying to figure out exactly what James had in mind. "Lily and I are planning to go to the Three Broomsticks on Saturday night, as a celebration of getting back together. We would like it if our three best friends came along."

"Oh if it is alright with you two, than I would love to!" Peter smiled.

"The Three Broomsticks?" Remus exclaimed. "In Hogsmeade?" James gave a swift nod in reply.

"Why all the way there?" Sirius asked. Peter looked at his two friends with confused looks; he imagined Sirius and Remus to look happier for James but the two seemed distant.

"Because Lily is currently teaching at Hogwarts." James said with another smile.

"Hogwarts?" Both Sirius and Remus blurted out.

"Blimey, that's amazing!" Peter said happily.

"What is she teaching?" Sirius asked curiously, becoming momentarily distracted from figuring out what James was planning.

"I didn't ask, but I'm sure if you two came along you can ask." James said nonchalantly. "So are you two in? Or is it just going to be just me, Lily and Peter?" Sirius and Remus looked at each other hoping the other would answer first, after what felt like a minute or two, they both reluctantly agreed.

"Excellent" James grinned. "We'll meet there at 10!"

"I'm so excited!" Peter said happily, he was glad that Lily was no longer the enemy.

"Well," Remus finally said. "I need to return, after all, I am still recovering from a few nights ago."

"Oh I should too!" Peter said in his chipper voice. "Shouldn't extend my stay"

Remus looked at Sirius expecting him to come along but the man didn't budge.

"I think I'll have another cup of tea before leaving" Sirius said as Remus looked at him questioningly.

"I see," Remus said blankly. "Well, see you all on Saturday." He said than left through the door with Peter.

Once the door shut, James turned towards Sirius with a smile that would even send chills down Voldemorts spine.

"James," Sirius started but was immediately interrupted.

"You wouldn't believe how easy the bitch was!" James laughed.

"What?" Sirius exclaimed. "You already slept with her?"

"Of course not, I'm taking my time. Get her all comfortable and happy, than drop her. That'll cause pain to both her and Snivellus agonizing pain." James laughed as Sirius looked at his best friend helplessly.

"My dear Prongs, listen to me. You do not want to do this, this is going too far." Sirius looked into his best friends eyes hoping to get through to him.

"My, my, I never thought that I would be lectured by you Padfoot." James smirked. "Anyways, I do want this; I want her to feel the same pain and humiliation she caused me. Oh Padfoot, you have no idea how easy it was. Just a simple 'I miss you' and 'I'm sorry' and some ass kissing and the deal was made."

"Prongs…" Sirius said uncomfortably as James continued.

"Really, women are easy. Evans isn't as smart as you think" James said getting up and starting to pace around the room. "You just add in a few cheesy comments and their already ready to give their life for you. All you need is some props for the set and they trust you with their lives." He said as he picked up a picture frame, smirked and threw it aside. "You should have seen it Padfoot, it was beautiful, and I was amazing. Just throw in some 'I couldn't stop thinking about you' and 'I was foolish enough to realize how dear you are to me until you were gone!' and she was in!"

"That's sick Prongs; even you know that's too far my friend. If you hate her so much why can't you just move on?"

"Move on?" James laughed. "I can do whatever I please. Besides," James said maliciously. "I thought you were my friend?"

"James, I am willing to do anything for our friendship but this is just wrong. It's immoral, so she slept with Snivellus. I admit she really stooped low there but come on! Be the bigger man here, Snivellus did unfairly attack you first but this is just low!"

"I've made up my mind." James said stubbornly. "I expect you to help out as well."

"What do I get out of it?" Sirius finally said with a smirk.

"Eternal friendship?" James smiled innocently as Sirius laughed.

"I think I already have that my dear friend."

"Tickets to the upcoming Quidditch world cup?"

"You are stubborn…" Sirius sighed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" James pouted.

"It's supposed to mean that I'm a bloody great friend you git." Sirius smiled. "Well, I suppose I should get going. Leave you to your _nasty_ plans."

"You're just as bad to part take Padfoot."

"Shall I not help than?"

"I guess that means no Quidditch world cup tickets."

"Oh shut it. See you Saturday." Sirius said and left through the door.

As soon as Sirius exited and walked down the street, he was immediately grabbed by the collar by Remus.

"Sirius," Remus glared. "I expect you to tell me exactly what you know about what James is planning."

"Moony!" Sirius smiled. "Fancy seeing you here! Where's Wormtail?"

"Never mind Peter." Remus said. "I know that you are aware of what James is planning."

"I do not!" Sirius said defensively.

"Sirius Orion Black, I have been your friend for how many years? Do you expect me to be dimwitted enough to not see that James is clearly up to something and you are aware of it? I saw the guilt etched on your face. Now speak!"

"Okay, okay." Sirius said looking into the angry werewolves eyes. "James is just a tad bit angry still, that's all. I'm sure it will pass!"

"What is James angry about?" Remus questioned.

"Did James not tell you?" Sirius said with a surprise. He figured Remus would have been up to date with all the events. Sirius gave a sigh as Remus let go of him. "How much do you know?" Sirius asked being careful with every word.

"I am aware that Lily and James had split and now they are back together."

"Well you see…" Sirius said nervously. "After the whole fiasco, James came home from work early only to find Snivellus and Lily in the house."

"Snape?" Remus said with a surprise. "What was he doing there?"

"Well, they were packing and…the greasy git attacked James."

"What?" Remus said slowly trying to take in the information.

"James found out that Lily was now sleeping with Snivellus, and that Snivellus is a Death Eater and-"

"Death Eater?" Remus spluttered. "Severus Snape a Death Eater? Are you sure about this Sirius?"

"Yeah" Sirius said. "I mean come on we all knew he hung out with _that_ sort of crowd. Anyways, When James tried to defend himself from an unfriendly spell from the git, Lily came in and defended the grease ball."

"Oh dear…" Remus said rubbing his temples.

"Yeah, and I guess James felt betrayed and humiliated."

"Why am I always the last person to find out about stuff like this?"

"Sorry mate, I guess James wants to pretend that it never happened."

"Sirius, can't you see?" Remus said. "James is already pretending that something didn't happen."

"Well, I can see why. I mean if I had a wife, I wouldn't want everyone knowing that she went and slept with someone I bullied through out my teenage years."

"Sirius," Remus said. "Can you not see? James is lying."

"Moony," Sirius said with a hint of hurt in his voice. "James is our friend. He's our _best_ friend, he wouldn't lie to us."

"He's lying to himself." Remus sighed.

"It'll pass…" Sirius said trying to help calm Remus down.

"If you haven't forgotten, Lily is also our friend. I would hate to see James' pride get to him and ruin their relationship again."

"Yeah…" Sirius said guiltily. "I would hate to see that too."

xxxx

Severus Snape had another unpleasant day, Potter had made Lily happy and all he was stuck with was teaching the dunderheads of Hogwarts. He wanted at least to do something more pleasant to do such as, spending more time with Lily, teach DADA instead of potions, talk with Lily some more and kill Potter. He wanted nothing more but James to be the next victim of the Dark Lord, which would eliminate the enemy for sure. Maybe he could convince the Dark Lord that James Potter is the enemy…After all, James was an Auror…he was getting in the way of the Dark Lords plans. The only thing Severus looked forward to at the moment was teaching Lily more about DADA tonight. The weekend was coming up and he would get to spend more time with Lily instead of teaching the idiotic children of tomorrow.

"Now if you would turn to page 254 you will see the ingredients for making a sufficient hair-raising potion, those who fail to conjure up an adequate potion will write three pages of parchment on why they failed to make this simple potion by Monday." Severus said, Monday was more than enough time.

"But sir," a brave Gryffindor in the front had said. "You have already assigned us the parchment on writing the solution to calm Firedrakes, surely we cannot fi-" Severus walked over and angrily slammed his hands on the student's desk causing the entire class to jump.

"Well, Mr. Fenwick. Than you better hope that you are competent enough to produce an acceptable potion." Severus said. As he turned his heel, he made sure to add: "And that will be 20 points from Gryffindor for interrupting." All the Gryffindors gave a loud groan but Severus turned back and looked back at the students. "Quiet" He said with poison in his voice. "That will be another 20 points from Gryffindor…What are you doing? Hurry up on your potions before I take off another 20 points."

All the students shuffled nervously but quickly to gather the ingredients from the front of the class. He couldn't believe how stupid some of the students were, the hair-raising potion was something he was capable of doing in first year. He had made Slughorn notice that he could easily complete any potion since day one. It irritated Severus beyond belief that these students couldn't appreciate the beautiful art of potions. If they weren't such blithering idiots, they would be capable of brewing glory, fame and even a stopper to death. But no, they had to be a bunch of clueless pinheads that didn't even bother reading ahead. The few students who did read ahead still lacked the intelligence that was needed to see what the knowledge of potions could do for them.

Severus sat at the front of the classroom as his black eyes bore into the back of the heads of students who were desperately trying to make a suitable potion so they wouldn't have another pile of homework to add to their list. It had only been 5 minutes since the students started and Severus could already spot the mistakes some had made. He briefly wondered whether or not he should make a snide remark towards certain students to give them a hint that they had added the wrong ingredients. In the end Severus came to conclusion that it was their own fault for not paying attention, and that they should learn from their mistakes. He got up and slowly paced around the tables; the nervous looks students would give as he walked by their cauldron was the only form of amusement he had. He studied the faces of each student, some were paying attention to their cauldron and some were not. He could calculate the percentage of students that would be writing the extra assignments just by observing the classroom. As time went by the percentage increased, until there was only 3 or 4 students who actually succeeded. Those students were the only students that read their textbook ahead of time.

By the end of class, Severus was emotionally exhausted of being surrounded by idiots all day and looked more forward for the day to finish so he could spend time with someone intelligent. By intelligent, he meant Lily. He would occasionally glance at the clock on his desk to check how much longer he had to wait until he was able to spend time with Lily.

By the end of the day he felt like he needed her like one would need oxygen. She was the only thing in his life that made it worth living; the time she was around he didn't give a rat's ass about the things that happened. He hated how easily Potter got her, him with his charming smile and charisma…Severus possessed neither trait. When she would leave him this time he would have her friendship, but he didn't want to be a friend in waiting. At times he would slip and wouldn't be able to hide his strong emotions for her, he just prayed that she wouldn't find out…and if she did he hoped that she wouldn't reject him. He couldn't stand to lose her again, no this time he couldn't take it. Just the thought of it caused him pain and he could literally feel the emptiness he would feel if she left. He was worried that if she was back with Potter that he would forbid her to see him, but that wouldn't stop Severus…No; he was willing to die for her.

As the sun went down, it was finally time for supper at the great hall. Dumbledore had seated Lily away from Severus so she could develop friendships with the other teachers. For obvious reasons, Severus did not like this at all; he shot a menacing look towards Quirrell who was talking to her. Quirrell gave a loud whimper causing Lily to look back to see what scared him and conveniently she didn't suspect Severus at all. Severus excused himself early so he could return to his chambers and prepare for the lesson on the dark arts that he was going give Lily.

Lily eyes followed Severus as he left the table early; she could see the fear in the eyes of students as he walked passed them. From what she had heard from students, he was a strict teacher and was quite harsh when it came to detentions.

"…_I've got another detention with Snape again." Ian Cramer complained loudly to his fellow Gryffindor classmates Douglas Kilgard and Allen McDermott. _

_"Poor you" Allen had said. "I haven't even started the paper that's due today…Douglas, can I copy off you?" _

"_No, if you get caught, I'm going to land myself a detention. I don't want to do that." Douglas replied. _

"_The miserable git is such an arse." Another Gryffindor, Drew Cayley piped in and the other three nodded in agreement. _

"_It's even worse with the fact that he is so biased when it comes to houses. It's obvious he prefers Slytherin, taking away our bloody points." Claire Bransford added. Lily's heart sank at the idea of how much the Gryffindors loathed Severus. She didn't want to believe that Severus was that cruel. _

"_I absolutely hate him." Ian plainly stated. . _

"_Now, Professor Snape is not as mean as you think." Lily interrupted them. Every single one of them looked at her with confused looks. _

"_It's true though," Drew said. "He's really unfair to us, always taking points off every chance he gets."_

"_That's right!" Claire exclaimed. "He says nothing but cruel things Professor Evans." _

"_He's actually a shy person," Lily added defensively. "He's actually a really sweet person, it's expected as a Professor that you be strict towards your students." To that, every student in the classroom scoffed. _

"_I bet she says that because she fancies Professor Snape" whispered one student loudly. Lily desperately tried to conceal that fact that she was blushing. _

"_As a fellow Professor I cannot ignore it when students are speaking ill of my colleagues." Lily quickly said. _

"_He's still a git" said Allen. Lily couldn't believe that the students loathed him that much. When he had tutored her, he explained things to her in detail and helped her in any way possible. The students were just blinded by hatred. _

Lily sighed and continued to pick at her dinner, she was worried for Severus. She desperately wanted students to realize that Severus was not a bad man. She decided to quickly finish her dinner and return to the chambers so she could see Severus faster.

When Lily had returned to the chambers, she found Severus scowling at scrolls of parchment and circling words with red ink.

"Hi Sev," Lily said gently. When Severus looked up he was taken in by her beauty, he gazed up her fiery red hair and emerald green eyes. Her smile was like an angel.

"Good evening" Severus replied.

"You looked stressed" Lily said almost whispering as she walked over towards him. Severus gave a deep sigh as he put another parchment in a pile. Lily walked over and read over one of the already marked parchment. It was a student's homework, as she read over what they had written she gave a chuckle.

"It's ridiculous" Severus said in a tired voice. He couldn't stand to read another stupid response on why the Swamp Potion was hazardous. "An utter waste of my time, it would have been better for certain students to not hand their papers in because it's so ridiculous."

"Sev," Lily said with a frown. "Some of these comments you put are really harsh."

"It's for their own good" Severus replied defensively.

"How?"

"If they don't read up properly, they are just going to end up harming themselves. Potions is dangerous, some potions will leave one permanently damaged if not careful."

"I guess so."

"I'm sorry; I just find it frustrating when students do not take their studies seriously. It…I don't know how to put it…I…"

"It's okay Sev" Lily said hugging him. Severus was taken aback by the hug; he wasn't used to another humans touch but it was rather comforting. He took in the smell of her sweet fragrance; he longed to have her, he wanted her desperately. Severus looked up to say something but changed his mind. He looked down at the chicken scratch the students had written and sighed.

"What is it?" Lily asked curiously. She was worried about her friend, he looked so depressed all the sudden.

"Nothing" Severus mumbled desperately trying not to open his mouth and spill it all. Lily went in to give her best friend another hug. Severus tightened up for a moment and sighed again. He was happy that Lily couldn't see his face because, he was sure that if anyone had seen the expression on his face, they would have known exactly what was going through his mind. Her face was fair, her personality was kind, her temper amiable, and her heart was kind. She was beautiful beyond any mans imagination; Severus couldn't help but glimpse into her jade green eyes and her fair complexion with a hint of pink. She was the most beautiful creature that he had ever set eyes on, he wanted her with all his heart, and he had never felt as much passion for anything or anyone, except for her. She was different. She was a whole new species, she was an angel. Here she was slipping through his fingers like the sands of time. No matter how hard he would try, there was no way he could stop her from leaving. Because there was someone else for her, someone else like James Potter.

He was going to lose to James Potter all over again, just like destiny had planned.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I will see you next chapter. TTFN!


	19. Chapter 19: Don't Let Go

One Night with Severus Snape

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Thank you's: David boreanaz's wife247, matrice, David Fishwick, starsmile, geasagobble, Vero and, Snape4ever,ujemaima.

Thanks for the reviews! I'm so sorry it took so long to update!

Author's Note (aka, the part you don't care about): Dear readers, sorry for the update that took absolutely forever! So much for updating soon huh? Anyways, the reason it took so long was because I hit a pretty bad stage of depression. Went in and out of hospital blah blah blah. It was wonderful!I've also been working and have a LOT on my hands. I hope everyone had fun on Halloween! This chapter originally was much much longer...like another 2000 words longer, but for me to work on it again would take me a lot longer to update so, that's why this chapters short. I've been meaning to update for a while...But I have been pretty busy/lazy haha. I've also been hit with a "writers block"...Not a writer but I'm sure you get what I mean lol! Again, sorry about the delay... Anyways hope people like this chapter!

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Severus Snape gently rolled down the sleeve of his left arm covering up the Dark mark, a mark he was ever so proud of but ashamed of at the same time. This mark branded onto his left forearm was a sign that he was one of them, within the inner circle of the most feared wizard; it was an honor to receive this mark. However, for once in his life, Severus was deeply ashamed of it. His stomach gave an uncomfortable squeeze as he imagined Lily's reaction upon realizing that he was something she begged him not to become, a monster, a Death Eater. For a moment, Severus could literally feel the pain and agony of losing her again. He took a deep breath attempting to calm his anxiety. He knew that he needed to cover this mark at all costs; he needed to make sure she never found out. For if she found out, it would cause Lily to lose all of her trust in him. He would lose her for sure and there would be no way out. What would he do? Skip over to Voldemort, hand in his resignation letter, have a sad good bye party, cherish the memories and keep in touch? If one decided to no longer be a death eater, Voldemort himself would _personally_ make sure that you disappear.

_You're already close to losing her_ a voice called in his mind. Reminding him of the unfortunate fact that she was most likely going to meet James Potter tonight and have a romantic get-away with him. Lily had briefly mentioned that she would be away Saturday night and wouldn't be back till late. Although he did not ask, he was damn sure that she was going off to see James. The thought of James _touching_ her made his blood boil, how was it that life allowed the man that had caused her so much pain to easily get her back.

He traced his finger gently over the dark mark that was now covered by his sleeve; he had never wished more that this mark did not exist. It was a mark that was condemning him towards a life of sin. It was a constant reminder that he will never have Lily Evans. She was angry for a long time after the fateful moment the words mudblood slipped out of his mouth. She would disappear from his life for sure this time. Would she cry? Would she claim he tricked her? Would she think he was luring her in so she could be the next sacrifice for Voldemort to use? So many questions ran through his head.

Suddenly he saw the face of his love peeking through the 2 sided fire place. It made Severus jump, had she seen the mark on his arm? How long was she there?

The look of fear on Severus face worried Lily, she wondered if something was wrong so she quickly went over to him. When she entered his room the look of fear had some how increased, like he was afraid of her. Each step she took made him flinch; she carefully studied his face in hopes to find at least a hint to what was wrong. Neither said a word, they both stared at each other; it was so quiet that both of them could hear the clock ticking away from the other room. Lily began to worry more and more, for a moment she contemplated staying with Severus instead of meeting James tonight. She had a weird feeling that she should not leave Severus alone for the night. The moment she thought of giving James a rain check a voice angrily screamed no. If she didn't go now than James may not give her a second chance. After all James was taking _her_ back after all the crap. Lily's stomach clenched for a moment, all the emotions she felt the night James decided he no longer wanted her felt so real again.

"Severus?" Lily called as Severus flinched at his full first name being used. He raised his head again, trying to read her. Did she know? Was he about to lose her? Her eyes didn't give anything away; she was still the beautiful Lily Evans.

She came up behind him and held him gently in a comforting matter. She was so close Severus could smell the sweet faint fragrance of the lavender perfume she was wearing. Her soft, touchable skin…Did he dare to touch? He desperately wanted to run his hands through her soft thick red hair and taste her full red lips. He wanted to hear her moan his name passionately, feel her soft body caressing against his body; he desperately needed her to quench his thirst. If he had turned his head slightly, he would have been so close…_too_ close. But would he mind? Probably not. Would she mind? Obviously she would, but he couldn't help but hope for otherwise.

"Severus?" She called gently again, her warm breath tickling his left ear. He deeply inhaled her arousing fragrance once more, a deep breath of ecstasy filling lungs. He had almost gotten a high of her smell, she was that wonderful.

"Yes?" Severus replied in his usual cold manner in hopes to cover up his arousal for her.

Lily was surprised that he had replied this time. She was beginning to worry; she wanted to know what was going through his mind. What was causing him this silence? Discomfort? Or was he possibly getting frustrated by her. Whatever it was he seemed like he needed comforting. She slowly walked around him and bent down on her knees and looked at him once more in the eyes.

"Are you alright?" She whispered, scared to talk any louder. Severus swallowed hard as she gently placed her hand on his thigh in a reassuring way.

"Yes" Severus said continuing to push certain thoughts aside. Her lovely green eyes staring at his cold black eyes, he could feel his body fill up with warmth. It was beginning to be impossible to resist her. Lily continued to stare at him, it was beginning to become difficult to remain eye contact with her, and he was starting to feel himself melt away. Her eyes were beginning to look concerned. For a moment Severus quickly wondered if Lily had learned Legilimency, he didn't doubt it for a second…she was a bright and skillful witch after all.

Lily gave out a sigh and ran her fingers through Severus' hair; she could tell that he was hiding something. But who was she to pry into his life? Was his girlfriend bothering him?

_Maybe they split up?_ A hopeful voice said in her mind. For a moment Lily was disgusted by herself for hoping for something that would cause her friend pain, but at the same time she couldn't deny that she was a bit hopeful that things had ended between him and _that_ woman.

"I don't know what time I'll be back tonight…but I may be late." Lily gently said as she continued to run her hand through his hair. Lily's heart skipped a beat as Severus' dark obsidian eyes met hers. There was something about it the way he looked at her, almost like jealousy. Lily began to seriously wonder if something happened between the mysterious beauty and him. She noticed that Severus was biting his lip, that was when she noticed the pained look on his face. He looked as if he was in agony, like he trying to contain himself, like he was battling inner demons.

"Oh Severus…" Lily said gently touching his face with her hand. She didn't say a word as she slowly caressed his face.

There was silence in the air as Lily held Severus closely until Severus finally opened his mouth:

"I'm sorry" Severus muttered. Before Lily could ask any questions, Severus had wrapped his arms around Lily's hips and pulled her in close for a kiss.

'_NO!_' Screamed a voice in her mind as Lily pulled back a bit to struggle but she found herself unable to let go. The sensation of his warm lips touching hers, his breath and silky tongue made her feel euphoric. Severus' arm crawled up holding her head and slowly leaning down until he had her against the floor. He pulled away from the kiss to look right into Lily's eyes, when their eyes met Lily was mesmerized by the dark onyx eyes. Still holding her close to his body, he began kissing her neck, gently and slowly. It took everything Lily had to keep her composure and not bite her lip or god forbid, let out a small moan as his lips roamed across her collarbone. A gasp escaped her lips as he rubbed her thigh firmly but gently, each touch felt amazing. Her breathing was becoming labored as she fell deeper and deeper into pure ecstasy. He gently bit her neck and she let out a moan of ecstasy.

"Oh Severus" she whispered. Every part of her seemed to shiver beyond her control, writhing desperately against the sense of his touch. As his lips pressed softly against her throat she let out shudder of breath. It seemed like forever before she could fine the strength to open her eyes. Where had he learned all this? She wondered. Each touch of his was sinfully sensuous.

_'STOP!' _screamed a voice in her mind, painfully pushing away the feelings that she had fought to keep hiding for so long. That was right; she was in love with Severus Snape. Did that she meant she loved James any less? Probably not... She loved James just as much…but maybe less? No, Lily didn't want to think of that, but the answer was pretty obvious. With Severus there was no promised path that life would take was a mysterious blur, no one knew what it held, but with James she would immediately regain her status of his wife, and possibly have a child. With Severus…she didn't even know if he took her seriously as a potential girlfriend…maybe wife…or as just…a rebound, play thing, whatever you wanted to put it as. Lily was reminded of the disturbing fact that he belonged to someone else and she belonged to James. A part her didn't care, she could careless about James and whoever the mysterious brunette Severus belonged to was, there was a part that wanted to see what would happen, feel him, love him and never let go, but the butterflies in her stomach began to fade away. Was he using her as a rebound? The more she thought about the more pain she felt. It felt like her heart had dropped to her stomach; that was when Lily's world began to fall apart. Tears began to form and she could feel her heart shatter into pieces. Did Severus only see her as a play thing?

_Of course he does _said a bitter voice. Her heart ached more and more. She was beginning to be angry, betrayed. How could he do this to her? She had cared for him so much. He knew that her heart only belonged to James, she couldn't believe it. The more she thought about the more hate she began feeling for her best friend.

Lily violently pushed Severus off of her causing him to awaken from his trance, seeing the tears form in her eyes caused a painful squeeze at his chest. Severus was never a man who took chances; he knew only miscalculating fools took chances. He often smirked at the look of disappointment people had on their faces when their idiotic plan had failed. But perhaps, Severus had really lost it, had made an action which he had only dreamt of, an action he always wished he would have the courage for, an action he couldn't take back, he had taken a chance. Here he was breathing heavily looking straight into the confused eyes of his true love. The eyes he knew he was never going to forget the first time he saw them. It was almost as if his mind had switched off and his body went after what his heart truly wanted most. He didn't know what made him do it, had he finally had enough of hiding his feelings? He could still feel her soft warm lips against his cold thin lips. A part of him had to think whether or not if he had actually just kissed her, whether it was just a day dream but the look of hatred in her eyes said otherwise.

Lily closed her eyes, her heart felt heavy as a soft sob escaped her lips. She felt light headed and had this awful feeling as if she had been in deep slumber for ages. She kept her eyes closed not wanting to look at him as a lone tear miserably trailed down her cheek.

Severus desperately searched his mind for words, but couldn't find anything. There was no logic answer he could give her. His mind refused to work, and instead came up with new and increasingly strident ways to tell him that he was an idiot. The look in his eyes said it all: he had betrayed her trust. She had put her faith in him and he had brushed it aside and selfishly acted, ignoring her feelings. But him acknowledging this was not enough to stop her from leaving.

As Lily took a loud deep breath Severus felt an overwhelming sense of grief pouring out of his heart. What had he done?

"I have to go" Lily whispered, her voice shaking.

"Lily!" Severus cried wishing desperately she would stay but she continued to walk away…not even bothering to turn back while a voice screamed inside her head. Shouting and prodding her to turn back and return to Severus…but all she did was keep her head down as the door closed shut behind her.

A searing pain came deepest from her stomach as a voice darkly whispered in her head-

_"…Maybe it's best now to let go."_

_

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A/N: _I apologize for the short chapter, this chapter was a bit longer but I decided to keep it for the next chapter, so I guess you know there is going to be a next chapter and some of it is done! Again, I apologize for the time it took for this chapter to come out. See you next chapter!_  
_


	20. Chapter 20: Sucker

One Night with Severus Snape  
Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter, if I did, the Harry Potter series would have been known as crap (Le gasp!)  
Thanks: David boreanaz's wife247, ujemaima, matrice, TheLPaddict, David Fishwick, abutterflysoul and Emma  
Thank you for your reviews! They continue to fuel my need to write fanfiction (sorry it took forever this time!) Thank you :)

Authors Note: So for a while I had unknowingly titled the fanfiction at the top of my page as: **Online with Severus Snape**…That would have definitely been interesting haha! Any who, yes, it took long again (sorry –cries-) I have started typing up the continuation for **Amaranth** as well for those who are wondering…Um…Yes. It'll be up within a week. I promise, if not…you may hunt me down with an army of people with torches.  
This chapter is really busy but yes…-starts talking like Trawlney- The ending is neeeeeaaaaarrrrrrrrr. –Ahem- But yes, the end of this story is coming soon, it'll be either another chapter or two…maybe three at most unless more dumb ideas come into my head. But the ending I have planned is coming soon so…-sob- thank youuuuuu!

Enough with the emotional author, and on with the story! Huzzah!

* * *

It was night outside and Severus Snape sat in his room full of regret and fear. He regretted everything he had done. He shouldn't have touched her. He shouldn't have laid a single finger on her. She was off limits from the start. His anger was fueled by thoughts of regrets, thoughts of what he should have done. He was highly disappointed in himself; he failed his number one rule to never become too emotionally involved in anything. However, with Lily it was a whole new story. One could simply not become involved, there was something about her that would pull you in and want to know more. He had been in love with her, no he still was in love with her but she was like the forbidden fruit. She was like water for someone who was lost in the desert, you felt like you absolutely needed her even a drop would be satisfying.

Severus wondered what she was doing at the moment. He desperately hoped that something would go wrong with her meeting with James. He hoped that his time with Lily had an effect on how she saw James; he sincerely hoped that Lily would realize James Potter was a complete prat.

He was suddenly reminded that he had caused tears to come out of the emerald eyes of hers, the memory of the tears that had gently streamed down the unbearably beautiful face of hers gave his chest a violent squeeze. He had caused her pain by selfishly forcing his feelings on her. He yanked at his hair, pulling at it as hard as he could, enjoying the pain; but it didn't help him forget. Nothing could. His head was pounding with pain, his stomach in shreds. His entire body ached. He knew from the start that she only sought his friendship, and now he had crossed the line. What was he thinking? What was he expecting? These were answers he himself could not answer. He tried desperately to wrap his mind around the logic of his actions.

"There is no logic to love Severus." The old voice said simply from the corner of the room. Severus quickly turned his head to see none other than Albus Dumbledore.

"Headmaster" Severus acknowledged the elderly man with a scowl. Despite his pitiful state, he was able to compose himself immediately. "To what do I owe this pleasure?" He certainly did not appreciate the old croon sneaking through his mind. Bitterly, Severus made a quick mental note to polish his Occlumency.

"The weather is truly beautiful isn't it?" Dumbledore smiled but Severus didn't even bother replying. He truly despised how the old man was dancing around the subject.

Dumbledore slowly paced around the room trailing his long frail fingers against the elegantly aged oak cabinetry. With Lord Voldemort on the rise, this old man looked much older than he was. The ministry had begged the man who should be retired to put an end to all this. After all, Albus Dumbledore was the strongest wizard of all time. However, when Albus politely declined to get involved saying that in order to beat the wretched creature known as Tom Riddle, he would have to sink to his level and perform Dark _dark _magic unimaginable to the average wizard or witch. This made Albus a 'few' enemies, few members of the ministry began to verbally attack the old man fiercely saying that he was old and senile, in denial of what was happening in reality. The media called him cold and heartless for just standing there and letting innocent lives perish. Headlines like "Albus Dumbledore: Friend or Foe?" were plastered all over the Daily Prophet. People eventually began questioning his powers. Was Albus Dumbledore really the strongest wizard alive? People were unconsciously stroking the ego of the Dark Lord. Now that the only one who could stop him was out of the way, Voldemort was now free to do anything he pleased without fear. What most people did not know was Albus Dumbledore had begun forming something known as "the Order of the Phoenix." Voldemort had heard rumors of this group and since than he became paranoid, convinced that people were plotting his downfall. It drove Voldemort insane; he vaguely held a resemblance of an elderly woman petting the corpse of a cat, completely in denial of its death. He began to obsess more than ever with the idea of immortality and now that he has murdered a few muggles, he seemed at ease. Crazy…but at peace.

"Where is Miss Evans?" Dumbledore asked with the twinkling eyes that seemed to see past everything.

"No clue." Severus replied bitterly.

"I see" Dumbledore replied quietly. "Lemon Drop?" He offered but Severus politely declined. "It really interests me how Miss Evans has changed you Severus"

To this all Severus could do was look at the old man in horror. The man knew that Severus had hurt Lily and he felt guilty. And like an injured Gazelle in the wild, Albus Dumbledore was the cheetah that was going to finish him off.

"You have softened," Dumbledore had continued. "You look happier."

"Thank you" Severus replied hoping to end this conversation as soon as possible. "Was there something you wished to speak to me about?"

"Oh nothing at all Severus" Dumbledore smiled. "I just wished to visit you."

"I see." Severus sneered. He had simply come here to bother a man in misery, how sweet. "I do not wish to be impolite Headmaster, I am busy at the moment."

"Ah, I see!" Dumbledore exclaimed. "I shall be on my way then!"

Severus sighed in relief as Dumbledore turned his back and headed towards the door.

"Oh, and Severus?" Dumbledore said one last time before leaving.

"Yes Headmaster?" Severus replied with a hint of exasperation in his voice

"I would chase after her if I were you" With that Dumbledore exited leaving Severus on his own in more pain than before.

**HPHPHPHP**

At first glimpse, James felt his heart beat rapidly. She was breath taking, she had class unlike any other women he was with the last few months. The tension between the two he felt when she visited few days ago confirmed that love was still in the air. He knew she still loved him, but the question was: How much love was there left? Two voices continued to argue on whether or not he still loved her or not. But it was obvious that the side that was claiming he no longer loved her was losing. He just refused to admit it. His eyes followed each step as she seductively walked towards him. It almost felt as if they were only ones in the room. He felt himself becoming hard just by staring into the familiar bedroom eyes. His body craved making love with her; he had become well aware of the difference of sex with love and sex with out it. With out it, it felt incredible but it couldn't even begin to compare to sex with love. With love you both slipped into a state of pure euphoria, like as if everything stressful and upset feeling you ever had were erased from your soul, each gasp took in another breath of happiness as two souls became intertwined.

He desperately searched to find a single flaw but failed to do so. The attraction between them was inevitable. He needed her.

As she took a seat he found it impossible to keep his eyes off her. His eyes were glued to her eyes, the emerald green. He watched her talk as she greeted everyone and began conversing with others. He desperately wanted revenge but at the same time he knew that his idea of sleeping with her for revenge was both childish and the only reason he was doing it was so he could have her again. It was light versus dark in his mind. Was there a chance? Yes, yes there was…There had to be. But a part of him was so angered by the fact she was with stupid Snivellus.

"Is it true Snape actually teaches at Hogwarts?" Peter grinned wickedly, failing to realize that he had brought up a dangerous subject. Sirius eyed James nervously, afraid of what might happen. James had lightly smirked but there was darkness to the smirk which made Sirius feel incredibly uncomfortable.

When Severus' name was mentioned Lily's heart nearly skipped a beat. Her heart sank down miserably remembering the event that had happened earlier. How was she going to face him? No need to worry, she told herself. She had James now.

"Yes" Lily replied with a weak smile. She really wished she didn't have to talk about him; her stomach gave a pull as she tried ever so hard to keep the tears falling down her face. She was afraid of him but so pulled in by him at the same time.

"What does he teach?" Peter continued to ask.

_Stupid Rat_ Remus thought darkly as he continued to keep an eye on James. He didn't know how he was going to react and that was what scared him the most.

"Potions" Lily smiled again.

"Potions?" Sirius finally laughed out loud! "The greasy git finally got a professional career playing with his chemistry set!"

"Now, now Padfoot" James said with a smile. "We shouldn't talk so badly of someone who has taken _great_ care of my wife."

With that the table fell silent.

"So Lily…" Remus finally said. "If Severus does teach Potions, whatever happened to Professor Slughorn?"

"Oh!" Lily exclaimed. "He actually retired! Last year I believe…Sweet man he was."

"Indeed he was" Remus smiled gently.

"Bah!" Sirius sneered. "You two only love dear ol' Slughorn because he _collected _you!"

"Do I sense a hint of jealousy?" Remus retorted with a smirk.

"Of course not!" Huffed Sirius "I was just merely stating a fact."

"Just as I was" Remus gave another smirk.

"Bloody wolf…" Sirius muttered as the rest of the table gave a chuckle.

"Do you remember when you and James blew up that cauldron in fourth year?" Peter said excitedly.

"Which time are you talking about Wormtail? That was nearly every day." Remus said causing James and Sirius to grin mischievously.

"Those were the days" Sirius grinned. "Before James decided to get all _mature_ for you Lils."

"I simply decided that playing pranks was not a good idea for my future" Protested James.

"Liessss"

"Oh shut up! I won't let you forget about that time you failingly attempted to seduce the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher…who was it…Professor Spencer?" James smirked before taking another swig of his drink.

"She was hot!"

"I don't think I've ever seen Sirius comb his hair before that." Giggled Lily.

"Not you too Lily! Don't betray me!"

"He even tucked in his shirt" Remus snickered.

"Aww Moony! Come on!"

"He even tried to steal flowers from Herbology class!" Peter chimed in.

"Aww guys shut up!"

"Cheers to Padfoots attempt!" Yelled James merrily as everyone but Sirius (who mumbled "She was pretty hot") clinked their glasses.

The rest of the night went smoothly and quickly, Lily at times found herself trying so hard not to mess up, afraid that James was judging every movement she made. She felt relieved to be back in her place, where she was destined to be, with James and as Lily Potter. The night ended when the bartender all kicked them out because it was passed closing, it truly had been a fun night indeed. It almost felt as if that she and James never were apart that all this time that they had been together and the last few months were just a nightmare and finally she had woken up. It was the most refreshing thing ever. She found mind occasionally wandering, and caught herself replaying the incident earlier in the day. But that didn't matter anymore; she was with the Marauders and her husband. What had happened between her and Severus almost seemed like a life time ago, it didn't matter much, no it did not. The night could have not gotten any better after everyone disapparated back to their homes and just before James had left himself he had asked Lily to try once more and her to come back home. Without a second thought she agreed, this was what she needed. All of the previous stuff never happened. This was how things were meant to be.

"I love you Lily" James said giving her gentle kiss before leaving.

"Love you too James" She smiled as she watched James disapparate. She almost felt like she was young again, couldn't wait till she could see him again, and her heart desperately beating on and on about James kissing her. Tears of joy were starting to spill out as she just hoped that things would last this way.

**HPHPHPHP**

"Oh please god" Cried a shaking voice of a young blindfolded woman. "I promise I'll be a better person, please."

"_Crucio_" whispered a voice as the woman shrieked again and let out a loud sob.

"Please, I'll do anything" the thin woman pleading desperately as tears trailed down her face. "Please!"

The figure let out a soft laughter as they circled the victim. They were clearly enjoying this woman's misery.

"_Crucio_" The hooded figure repeated. As the woman screamed, a woman cackling loudly was heard.

Bellatrix Lestrange grabbed the woman violently by her hair and pushed her wand into the woman's neck.

"Please master," Bellatrix seductive voice echoed the room.

"Let me kill the filthy muggle." Bellatrix's sweetly purred as she licked the woman's neck.

"Now now," Voldemort smiled. "Let's not treat our wonderful guest as food."

"Please!" the woman let out another loud sob. "I promise to be better. I'll be better! Have mercy on me!"

"It's always the same." Voldemorts smooth voice echoed the large corridor. "I'll promise I will be a better person, please don't do this, I'm too young or, when I untie myself I'm going take the stick of yours and shove it up your ass!"  
A roar of laughter followed with the last bit as Voldemort chuckled at the sweet sweet memories.

"I promise! I promise!" Voldemort cried in a mocking tone. "I'll be better!"

Bellatrix eyes followed the dark lord circling around the muggle woman like a shark ready to catch it's prey. She licked her lips in anticipation, with her breathing becoming shallow, feeling goose bumps of pleasure dance up her spine, the kill was coming.

"What's that? You'll be better?" Asked Voldemort. He lowered his voice and looked at the victim with pure disgust. "Well it doesn't matter does it? It won't change the fact that you muggles are dirty little cockroaches. _Avada Kadavra_."

Severus stood there behind the mask with a look of disgust as Nagini slithered her way towards the muggle woman and Voldemort praising her as a good snake and to eat right up. It was still early in the morning, and Lily had not returned by the time he needed to leave when Voldemort conveniently summoned the Death Eaters at…4 in the bloody morning. Severus had begun to wonder if Voldemort aminagi form happened to be a snake. He was certainly cold blooded enough.

"Meeting adjourned" Voldemort said with a smile as everybody yawned and looked eager to get back to bed.

Bellatrix's eyes flickered excitedly as Severus marched out of the room angrily. The look of madness in his dark eyes drove her wild. She inhaled the fragrance of Severus as he walked right by her not even glancing at her. The idea of breaking, no, _corrupting _someone was her pleasure. Her deepest desire.

Her immanent insanity was what repelled Severus; he needed to get away from the disaster fast. But she wouldn't give up that easily, Rudolphus seemed more than pleased to turn a blind eye. He eyed Bellatrix with disgust, he didn't know what emotion she possessed but whatever it was he did not like it. He felt safer around the Dark Lord on a bad day than spend time alone with her.

"_Seeeeverrusss"_ Her wild voice called after him as she clinged onto his arm happily.

"Bellatrix" Severus sneered. His cold gaze sent shivers down her spine.

"Where are you going?" She smiled.

_Oh Merlin_ Severus bitterly thought. He tried to shake her off but she only seemed to cling harder almost cutting of circulation.

"Severus" Her voice sung. She pulled onto his arm hoping to make him feel her breasts. "Where are you going?"

"That, my dear Bellatrix, is private." He said looking like he had just eaten something sour as he looked at her with pure disgust.

"You can tell little old me." She purred "I wont tell a soul"

"Even if you tried I'm sure nobody would want to believe you seeing how you are no where close to the definition of sane" He scowled.

"Severus" Bellatrix pretending to look hurt. "I'm not crazy"

Severus rolled his eyes attempting to shake her off again but she refused to let go.

"If you do not let me go," Severus finally said shoving his wand into the side of her throat. "I can assure you that I will happily curse you with _dark_ magic."

Severus frowned as he saw this had no affect. If anything her eyes lit up with pure excitement, like she would accept the challenge. She licked her lips hoping to receive this _dark _curse. _Anything_ would suffice; she wanted him to pay attention to her.

"Rudolphus!" Severus barked. "Control your damned woman."

"Bella" Rudolphus said with a sigh. "Come now"

Bellatrix scowled and finally let go. But as he walked away she tauntingly called "I'll get you soon" with that he disapparated.

**HPHPHPHP**

It had been a week since the whole incident and still Lily had refused to talk to him.

It seemed as if there wasn't a glimpse of hope in sight, it felt like a repeat of the mudblood incident. Lily was now acting like he didn't exist unless it was completely necessary...and that wasn't very often. Most nights she would disapparate and return early in the morning to teach classes.

His heart ached as he briefly glimpsed at Lily conversing with students, how he wished that she would bless him with that smile again. But she would no longer even glimpse at him, like he did not exist. He bitterly scowled as he noticed male Gryffindor students attempting to impress her. Severus turned his heels sharply and walked of in a sea of anger.

How could he have been so foolish? He thought to himself angrily. Of course she wouldn't like him in that sense; he was far from the definition of handsome.

He slammed the doors open to the class room. Students flinched and would stop whatever they were doing and pay attention.

"Dramatic, much?" whispered Gryffindor student Sean Taylor.

"10 points from Gryffindor" Severus said sounding bored. "Turn to the section on brewing the essence of the everlasting rose." Severus sighed; he hated this particular potion almost as much as he hated Potter.

"But-"

"No buts Mr. Taylor, 5 points from Gryffindor for interrupting the class." Severus said pulling the projector out.

"Now can any of you dunderheads provide the answer to how many times you are supposed to stir your cauldron before you put three drops of liquid troup?"

Silence filled the class.

"For your information it is 4 and a half." Severus said with another sigh. "Can any of you tell me what exactly liquid troup is?"

Silence filled the class again.

"Nobody?" Severus smirked darkly while studying the classroom. "Pity...You all should have learned this from first year. Clearly your minds are filled with Quidditch rather than your studies." He sneered; it was going to be exactly the same like every year, no, the same as every damned day. If they'd even pay attention to their book they would have immediately noticed it was the first step on the page. Nevertheless, he still had the enjoyment of watching students try ever so hard on something they were going to fail. If any of them had been observant enough, they would have realized that this potion was in the advanced learners section, which was again written right on the very top of the page.

He hated this; he just wanted her to look his way again. To even have a conversation! Every time at dinner, Dumbledore would look his way as if mocking him for not be on pleasant terms with Lily by now.

Severus just wished blasted Potter wasn't in the way. Even if she wasn't with him, at least she wouldn't be _stuck_ to Potter who would make her feel absolutely miserable. He truly felt like he was a sucker.

Severus had lost again, this was what destiny had chosen.

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A/N: Whew. Done that chapter. I apologize about the abrupt ending! I am hoping to update soon but please don't take my word for it (sorry) Any who, toodle loo! See you next chapter!


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